Trabia Garden

I've seen The Comedy About Spies twice in the last month, and I enjoyed it a lot! It would obviously be ludicrous to go for a third time. But the play is leaving the West End within the next couple of days, and, well.

(I stare into the camera for slightly too long.)


( The Comedy About Spies, 24 September 2026, including cast encounters at the stage door. )


At home, I gave Rei the Peter Pan Goes Wrong script and explained it had been signed by the actors of Robert, Chris, Trevor and Vanessa, along with Adele James.

Pause.

Me: AND JONATHAN'S ACTOR, I FORGOT JONATHAN AGAIN
Rei: If I ever meet this guy, I'm going to tell him you forget about him every time you meet him at the stage door.

Some more responses to Goes Wrong questions I've received on Tumblr!

Anonymous: what do you think cornley would make of the play in ff7?

Imagine how livid Robert would be when Cloud and his date got the lead roles just for being the hundredth couple at the play. These people are not actors!

“Excuse me!” Robert snaps, rising to his feet in the audience. “Chris and I entered before these two! We were clearly the hundredth couple; those roles are rightfully ours. You simply assumed we weren’t a couple because we are both men, and I will be filing a discrimination case unless we are given our rightful place on that stage.”

“We’re not a couple!” Chris hisses at him in a panic. “And we don’t know the script!”

Robert, undeterred, bullies the organisers until they give him the role of the Evil Dragon King just to shut him up. (If Cloud chooses the ‘kiss the Evil Dragon King’ option, Robert really goes for it.)

At the climax, the entire set collapses, exposing a sheepish-looking Trevor, who has secretly been moonlighting as the stage manager at the Gold Saucer. Robert and Chris stare at him, incredulous.

Anonymous: If Cornley were in a JRPG what do you think their fighting styles would be in combat?


Annie fights with her fists; Robert alternates between body-slamming the opponent and putting them to sleep with a long monologue; Sandra inflicts status effects (Charm being her speciality); Max makes silly faces at the screen and ignores the enemy; Dennis attempts to befriend the enemy or hide; Trevor will occasionally hurl a bomb into the fray from offscreen, sometimes injuring you and sometimes injuring the opponent; Jonathan... wait, where’s Jonathan? He was right behind us. Why isn’t he on the battle screen?

Chris doesn’t fight himself, instead giving the others instructions that half of them will ignore. Vanessa consistently follows Chris’s instructions and will panic if Chris is out of action.

Anonymous: Here is a prompt and/or a thought experiment. After long and considered reflection, Chris Bean decides that getting an assistant may be the best way to tamp down on the Drama Society's tendency toward chaos. Unfortunately, the assistant he finds is certified (and possibly certifiable) chaos gremlin Alex Horne.

Although I'm delighted by this bonkers concept, I struggled at first with how to picture it because it's so hard to envision Alex Horne - or, more specifically, the character of Alex Horne as the Taskmaster's assistant - outside Taskmaster! Without the Taskmaster, who is the Taskmaster's assistant?

Conclusion: he needs a Taskmaster. Alex latches on to Chris, obeying him unquestioningly and homoerotically. Chris is slightly uncomfortable to realise that his new assistant is prepared to go above and beyond to an 'I'll buff your feet for you' extent. Robert is intensely envious and makes multiple attempts to poach Alex for his own assistance.

During casting, Sandra flirts a little with Alex in the hope of getting him to put in a good word for her with Chris. She's affronted by his complete lack of reaction and starts turning up the flirtation, trying to get him to act even slightly less like a block of wood. It becomes common to see Alex impassively working away on his iPad while Sandra drapes herself over his lap.

Dennis is relieved by the presence of an assistant: someone who can remind him of his lines! Whenever Dennis requests a line, Alex's response is just 'All the information is in the script', which Dennis faithfully repeats. This happens multiple times per play.

In the 2016 radio special The Christmas That Goes Wrong, Jonathan loses his wallet, containing the only photograph he has of himself with his daughter. I felt so bad for him! Here's a fic following up on that.


Title: The Annie Twilloil School of Problem-Solving
Fandom: The Goes Wrong Show
Rating: G
Wordcount: 1,300
Summary: Annie, after learning Jonathan has lost his only photo with his daughter, enlists Robert to help fix this problem in the most normal and sensible way possible.


( The Annie Twilloil School of Problem-Solving )

Every so often, I post an analysis of how I chose my recent fic titles! Titling is something I've always struggled with, and the vast majority of these were chosen in an 'oh, no, I've got to call it something' panic right before posting.

In reverse chronological order, my fic titles since the last roundup:


( Rambling about why I chose fic titles. )


I originally started doing these analyses in the hope that it would make me better at coming up with titles. I'm not sure it's really helped, but it's interesting to think about, at least!

Some more responses to Goes Wrong-related messages I've been sent on Tumblr!

the_anime_idiot: thoughts on Robert & Chris & Trevor just existing in the same space? those three are incredibly weird about each other

Oh, wow, it's hard to know where to begin with these three!

I suppose the short version of Chris and Robert's relationship is that they're acting rivals with some very weird things going on underneath. Robert views Chris simultaneously as his enemy - the unreasonable, unqualified director standing between Robert and true acting greatness - and as his closest friend. Chris views Robert as a bomb that could at any point destroy everything around him. There's conflict, but there's also respect; the two of them strive to outdo each other on stage, and Robert explicitly considers Chris one of the better actors in the company.

By contrast, there's no respect between Robert and Trevor. From Robert's perspective, Trevor is not an actor, so what does he add to proceedings? However, despite his lack of respect for Trevor's role, Robert does trust and rely on Trevor, and will call on him for help in an emergency.

We don't see a lot of Trevor's attitude to Robert, but I feel Trevor probably doesn't have a lot of time for him, going largely by the fact that, when Robert calls for his line during his death scene in Haversham Manor, Trevor's response is 'Just die already.' Other people have also made the interesting observation that, in Summer Once Again, Trevor is nowhere to be seen: because Robert decided that a stage manager was unnecessary, or because Trevor doesn't want to support Robert as the director?

That said, I was recently rewatching the footage from Dennis's birthday party in the televised version of A Christmas Carol Goes Wrong. There's a point where Jonathan tells Chris, 'I think Robert would make a great leading actor.' I'd never noticed before, but Trevor nods at that, almost imperceptibly! So perhaps Trevor does have a little respect for Robert, or at least for his acting ability.

The main impression I have of Trevor and Chris's dynamic is that Trevor works very hard for Chris but also finds him frustrating, because Chris has a tendency to take him for granted and push him well beyond his job description. Trevor can be blithely destructive in a way Chris finds stressful, but can also sometimes act as a grounding voice, perhaps because he's not an actor and therefore isn't as intensely invested in their productions as most of the others.

When you put Chris, Robert and Trevor in the same space, I think the main dynamics that emerge are:

- Robert resents having to compete for Chris's attention with Trevor. The man's not even an actor!
- Trevor is frustrated by Chris and Robert's demands; both of them take these plays way too seriously.
- Chris has to deal with the simultaneous stresses of Robert being too intense and Trevor being too casual.

Eventually, everyone explodes.

Anonymous: sorry but you will not convince me that robert is vanilla, when in summertime once again he wrote in his diary about another spanking from mother :P i wonder what would happen if chris misjudged a choreographed fight maybe, or robert tripped and got a spanking on accident?

(This was presumably in response to my earlier declaration that 'The trouble with Grovebean, and I say this as an enormous Grovebean fan, is that I feel Robert is romantic and vanilla in bed, whereas Chris has a masochistic streak a mile wide and just wants someone to tie him up and whip him.')

You make an intriguing point!

As we see so little of the characters offstage, a lot of Goes Wrong characterisation is an exercise in extrapolation. When I say I think that Robert is romantic and vanilla in bed, I’m largely extrapolating from:

- Robert’s insistence that it’s impossible to depict sadness without tears.
- Robert really wanting to make sure that, during his romantic getaway with Chris’s mother, there will be flower petals on the bed.

My conclusion: Robert is a man who thinks there is a Right Way to do things, and that ‘right way’ is usually the most obvious, surface-level way you can get. If you’re sad, you should cry; if you’re happy, you should smile. If you’re making love - and I’m convinced Robert uses the phrase ‘making love’ - it should be what you’d see in the most clichéd romantic film you can imagine: tender and slow, lots of kissing, flower petals, candles, maybe some violin music if you can browbeat Jonathan into standing in the corner and playing the violin.

However! I think you’re right; there’s a part of Robert that just wants to get dommed by a mother figure, hence the multiple times he’s slept with the drama society’s literal mothers. Celia definitely tied him up, and he loved it.

This is unfortunately of limited use on the Grovebean front, because Chris could not dom anyone if his life depended on it. Chris misjudges a choreographed fight and strikes a genuine blow, Robert groans in an inescapably sexual way, and Chris promptly changes his name and leaves the country.

Anonymous: sry if it's not your interests, it's not grovebean, but i wonder that annie might actually love to dom robert, lol. she wouldn't be serious domly dom, but more i think she'd find it amusing/fun to push around a big guy like robert, more in a fun acting kind of way but also gratifying? and of course robert, very weird. i think if chris found out about it he'd immediately wish he hadn't. and then spend too much time thinking about it. anyway i love reading your thoughts on these weirdos, thank you~

Please be assured that this is five hundred percent my area of interest and I love it. I’m so here for Robert/anyone.

You’re absolutely right; Annie would have a great time domming Robert. What I’m envisioning:

- Robert is an arsehole in some way (hard to imagine, I know); maybe he says something over the line to Dennis.
- Annie scolds him.
- Robert starts repeatedly transgressing in the same way, looking hopefully at Annie every time he does.
- Annie eventually goes, “What’s wrong with you? It’s like you want me to yell at you.”
- “Would you mind?” Robert asks.
- Annie brightens. “Wait, you actually do want me to yell at you? I can definitely do that. You don’t have to be mean to Dennis for it.”
- They experiment! Things escalate!
- Eventually, Chris walks in on Annie using a nude Robert as a footstool. He is deeply uncomfortable and tells them it’s incredibly inappropriate to use the playhouse for sexual purposes.
- Both Annie and Robert look at him like he’s lost his mind. Sexual?? What’s sexual about this??? You’re imagining things, Chris.

I really enjoyed the 'Woodbead thinks Janet is here to audition him for James Bond; Janet thinks he's flirting' subplot in The Comedy About Spies, and I was delighted when Purple_vulture gave me an excuse to write fanfiction about it. Farce is so difficult to write, though! I have a newfound respect for anyone who's ever tried.


Title: Angling for the Part
Fandom: The Comedy About Spies
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: Janet/Woodbead
Wordcount: 1,000
Summary: Janet’s here on business, but there’s no reason not to mix business with a little pleasure. Which is why she’s ended up at the door of Douglas Woodbead’s hotel room.
Warning: Absolutely stupid.


( Angling for the Part )

Yesterday, I went to see the Comedy About Spies matinée at the Adelphi Theatre! The Comedy About Spies is not a Goes Wrong production, but it is a Mischief Theatre production, and it stars most of the cast of The Goes Wrong Show.

Several other members of the Goes Wrong fandom were attending the same performance, so I met up with Purple_vulture, LancashireGirl and you-know-your-name for a meal before the show! Both Purple_vulture and LancashireGirl told me that they previously hadn't much liked Robert, but my fanfiction had helped them like him. I was absolutely thrilled to hear I'd helped to bolster Robert's popularity within the Goes Wrong fandom. No higher praise.

We took our seats before the show; you-know-your-name and I were sitting together. The stage had a silhouetted backdrop of the London skyline. you-know-your-name suddenly pressed a hand over their face and started laughing.

you-know-your-name: Not me seeing Big Ben and thinking, Oh, it's that thing from Peter Pan.
Riona: I suppose you're not wrong!

Henry Lewis was very handsome and his hair looked great. That alone could have carried me very happily through a couple of hours, but, as a bonus, The Comedy About Spies is a very fun, very slick play, with great performances all around and a lot of ambitious physicality. I really enjoyed myself. What a lovingly done, absolutely committed performance of farce.


( The Comedy About Spies, 30 August 2026. )


And then, emboldened by being in the company of another Mischief fan, I went to the stage door! I've never met actors at the stage door before, and I was slightly nervous, but it was a really good experience overall. you-know-your-name was increasingly vibrating with excitement after every person we met, which was a delight to see.

I'd brought my Christmas Carol Goes Wrong script along, just so I had something that could potentially be signed. I wasn't sure until the last moment whether I'd actually ask for autographs; I knew I wanted to ask the actors whether they were willing to be hugged, and I thought that requesting autographs on top of that might be too much! But, when Greg came out with his own pen poised and ready, it immediately became clear that the actors were very relaxed about autographing things, so I did indeed get signatures in the end.


( Meeting the Goes Wrong/Comedy About Spies cast at the stage door. )


When I got home, I told my housemates (who enjoy the Goes Wrong Show) that I'd shaken Henry Lewis's hand, and that I'd hugged the actors of Vanessa, Annie, Chris and Trevor.

I wandered out of the room, and then paused. Something didn't feel right. I flipped my Christmas Carol Goes Wrong script open and double-checked the signatures.

I poked my head back into the room. "I've just realised that, appropriately enough, I forgot that I also hugged Jonathan's actor."

I feel bad about it. I'm sorry, Greg! You were so nice!

I made this image for my Goes Wrong website and, unfortunately, I think it might be the best thing I've ever done.

While I'm thinking about stupid Death Note crossovers, here's my response to an anonymous question I received on Tumblr a month or so ago: what if light woke up in hope peak academy? what if, he didn't have the death note?

It’s interesting to contemplate Light in a Danganronpa situation! He’s willing to kill, obviously, but he’s used to killing in the distant, detached way the Death Note enables.

Without the Death Note, I think Light would end up trying to set up traps, trying to find ways he can kill without being in the room himself at the time. He reasons that this is the logical thing to do because, if he’s not at the crime scene, it’s harder to pin him as the culprit. And he’s not wrong! But it’s also because he doesn’t want to kill someone with his own hands; he finds the thought of stabbing or strangling someone disturbing. He wants something detached; he wants to keep himself clean.

He doesn’t like to acknowledge this; it’s a weakness in his eyes. So he’ll just keep telling himself that he’s taking the most logical course of action.

(He might also be willing to use poison as a method, come to think of it.)

Light’s first choice of victim would be someone whose death he can easily justify to himself. He’d target someone like Mondo. A violent delinquent, a gang leader; who’s going to miss him?

If he struggles to kill Mondo, though, he’s willing to switch his victim to someone he considers easy to kill, like Chihiro or Naegi, or to whoever poses the biggest risk in trials, i.e. Kirigiri. He justifies this to himself by telling himself it’s essential for him to get out of here. After all, it’s his duty to rid the world of crime, isn’t it? Sometimes sacrifices must be made.

There are two ways I envision things going if Light ends up in the first Danganronpa game:

1) Light uses a trap to kill Kirigiri and assumes he’s home free; nobody else has the intelligence to pin him as the culprit. He’s outraged and incredulous when Naegi unravels his plan in the trial.

2) Light spends several chapters planning the perfect crime, assuming nobody’s capable of taking him down, and ends up getting murdered by someone else before he can carry it out.

The day after we saw Death Note: The Musical at the Barbican, Tem turned to me and asked, 'Do you want to go back and see it from the front row?'

And I did. I really, really did.

We went to yesterday's matinée and had a great time. Going from 'far enough to see all the choreography' to 'close enough to see all the expressions' was such an interesting contrast!

I'd heard that the stage was on the tall side, and I was a little worried that it would obscure what was going on, but it was absolutely fine! We couldn't always see everything that was happening in the shinigami realm, which was on a higher level above the main stage, but, to balance that, having the gods physically high up above us was pretty cool.

(There was a moment I was very worried about the height of the stage. Instead of a curtain, the Barbican has an unsettling shiny black monolith, with a prominent horizontal seam about eight feet up. I was looking up at it, thinking '??? surely the stage cannot be eight feet tall???? I've heard it's tall, but surely it's not so tall that nobody at the front can see anything.' Fortunately not!)

Death Note feels so well suited to the stage. At its heart, it's almost a Greek or Shakespearean tragedy, particularly with the musical's revised ending. I really hope it has a future in London beyond this short run.

In the queue for the loos at the interval, a woman in perhaps her sixties asked me whether it was originally an American production, so I had the opportunity to speak a bit about the odd history of this musical. Although the songs were originally written in English by an American composer, over ten years ago, they were translated into Japanese for the first performances, and this London run is the first time the musical has been performed in full in English.

'It's such an incredible production,' the woman commented. I'm glad to see this musical winning over newcomers to the story!


( Death Note: The Musical, 20 August 2026. )


Ryuk's first appearance in the human world is impressively done: the lights in Light's room start to flicker, then go out for just an instant, and when they come back on Ryuk is standing on Light's bed. The first time I watched the show, I couldn't imagine how this was done! Light's bed was too far from the wings for Ryuk's actor to have run in during that brief blackout; how had Ryuk appeared?

Coming back to watch from the front row, one of my main thoughts was that perhaps I'd be able to solve this mystery at last. How does Ryuk appear on Light's bed during that second or two of darkness?

The answer is perhaps the best thing I could have hoped for: turns out Ryuk was already in Light's bed, hiding under the covers. I just caught a glimpse of him starting to emerge as the lights went out.

It's an impressive bit of stage trickery, but I like to believe that 'Ryuk was hiding in Light's bed to screw with him' is also canon. If the blackout hadn't happened, Light would have been very startled to discover Ryuk when he pulled back the covers to go to bed.

The Murder at Haversham Manor, 2012 (dir. Chris Bean)
I'm sorry, everyone. I had the sudden realisation that Galuf of Final Fantasy V was basically a ready-made pixellated Robert Grove, and there was only one thing I could do. Someone should make The RPG That Goes Wrong.

While I'm posting stupid Goes Wrong things, here are a few ficlets! (Not all the ficlets I've written lately; I'm keeping a couple in reserve in the hope I can combine them into a single fic.)


( Three Goes Wrong ficlets. )


I don't often stick around in a fandom long enough to become recognisable, so I'm delighted to have found myself accruing a reputation in the Goes Wrong fandom. Multiple people have referred to me as 'the Robert guy' or 'a Robert connoisseur'. It's the name I've always wanted to make for myself.

Yes, I've only known Robert Grove existed since December. I stand by it. It's the name I've always wanted to make for myself; I just haven't always known it's the name I wanted to make for myself.