Because I now kind of associate Zombie Piers Morgan with Scofield From Prison Break: there is a character in Unforgiven also called Scofield, and I watched the film pretending that PB!Scofield had broken out of prison to become a cowboy with Clint Eastwood and Samuel L. Jackson (*black ears*). It made the two hours a lot more bearable.

(It is a problem because obviously I would become drunk on my power and possibly go on an illusionist rampage and eventually Torchwood would have to put me down. Ineptly.)

(IT'S TOO LATE NOW.)