(Um. I think the lateness is de rigueur for me now.)
Top Gear Dog is a very kindly dog. Oh, dear, Jeremy. To be fair, I doubt Hermione would be too fond of him anyway. Yippee that you still like this! (Er, after reading the earlier comments, it has occurred to me that when you said 'I already laughed about it in the fic' you meant your fic-self was laughing at it and not that I was stealing things from myself. Erm, yes, that was the most pointless thing I have ever said. And it is perhaps a little weird that I decided to re-read the beginning of the demented bodyswap for no reason. Oh well.)
Suddenly, an idea occurred to May. He nudged Hammond in the ribs with his elbow and hissed, "You know, Richard, since these strange people have wands, they might be able to reverse this bodyswap and get us out of this mess."
Richard looked suddenly rather cheerful at the prospect of not going to jail, but then his face fell. "No, May, I don't think I really want Clarkson back to his normal self considering the things he's been threatening." Richard shudderd.
James looked at him curiously. "Hammond, I really think you need to explain what exactly it is that Clarkson's been threatening you with."
Richard scowled. "Do the words; 'You really don't want to know' mean nothing to you?"
"Rich, I don't think I can fully assess whether it's worth giving Clarkson the oppurtunity to act like a teenage girl just to avoid this threat being carried out without you telling me what it is."
"May, just trust me, it's awful."
May sighed. "I suppose I'll just have to ask Jez then."
Hammond's eyes bulged in horror. "What? No! No no no. You stay away from him."
At that precise moment, Jeremy had decided that now was perhaps the time to find out more about his new-found friend Harriet, to make his impression of a teenage girl even more convincing.
"Harriet, I'd like you to tell me what life is like as an eighteen-year-old girl in Britain today."
Hermione stared at them incredulously. "What?! Why on Earth are you asking a man in his forties what it's like to be a teenage girl?!"
"I think," muttered Ron, "you ought to be more concerned about why a man in his forties is called Harriet."
"Your surname is Weasley," Jeremy pointed out, and then realised that since he wasn't actually called Harriet, there was no reason to retort.
Ron looked hurt. "Weasley is a proud family name that's been carried down over generations! It's very well known in the wizarding world!"
"That doesn't mean it's not ridiculous."
Hermione cleared her throat, and was about to defend Ron with a speech about the origins of the Weasley family, their contribution to international wizarding and their help in the war against He-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named, when May appeared, smiling nervously. "I think I have an idea that could fix this."
"No you don't!" said Hammond desperately. May ignored him.
no subject
Top Gear Dog is a very kindly dog. Oh, dear, Jeremy. To be fair, I doubt Hermione would be too fond of him anyway. Yippee that you still like this! (Er, after reading the earlier comments, it has occurred to me that when you said 'I already laughed about it in the fic' you meant your fic-self was laughing at it and not that I was stealing things from myself. Erm, yes, that was the most pointless thing I have ever said. And it is perhaps a little weird that I decided to re-read the beginning of the demented bodyswap for no reason. Oh well.)
Suddenly, an idea occurred to May. He nudged Hammond in the ribs with his elbow and hissed, "You know, Richard, since these strange people have wands, they might be able to reverse this bodyswap and get us out of this mess."
Richard looked suddenly rather cheerful at the prospect of not going to jail, but then his face fell. "No, May, I don't think I really want Clarkson back to his normal self considering the things he's been threatening." Richard shudderd.
James looked at him curiously. "Hammond, I really think you need to explain what exactly it is that Clarkson's been threatening you with."
Richard scowled. "Do the words; 'You really don't want to know' mean nothing to you?"
"Rich, I don't think I can fully assess whether it's worth giving Clarkson the oppurtunity to act like a teenage girl just to avoid this threat being carried out without you telling me what it is."
"May, just trust me, it's awful."
May sighed. "I suppose I'll just have to ask Jez then."
Hammond's eyes bulged in horror. "What? No! No no no. You stay away from him."
At that precise moment, Jeremy had decided that now was perhaps the time to find out more about his new-found friend Harriet, to make his impression of a teenage girl even more convincing.
"Harriet, I'd like you to tell me what life is like as an eighteen-year-old girl in Britain today."
Hermione stared at them incredulously. "What?! Why on Earth are you asking a man in his forties what it's like to be a teenage girl?!"
"I think," muttered Ron, "you ought to be more concerned about why a man in his forties is called Harriet."
"Your surname is Weasley," Jeremy pointed out, and then realised that since he wasn't actually called Harriet, there was no reason to retort.
Ron looked hurt. "Weasley is a proud family name that's been carried down over generations! It's very well known in the wizarding world!"
"That doesn't mean it's not ridiculous."
Hermione cleared her throat, and was about to defend Ron with a speech about the origins of the Weasley family, their contribution to international wizarding and their help in the war against He-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named, when May appeared, smiling nervously. "I think I have an idea that could fix this."
"No you don't!" said Hammond desperately. May ignored him.