I knew he'd have a Jigglypuff! Those things are freaky!

And 'necessary paedophilia thoughts'? You're giving Derren Brown a real run for his money on the adorable-meets-unsettling thing, aren't you?

(That's not true; he's definitely got you beat at being unsettling, and you win at adorable. But if you team up, we're all doomed. Possibly you included.)