And All You Can Taste Is Iron At The Back Of Your Throat.

[rionaleonhart]

I just had a conversation with moogle62 that included the phrase 'necessary paedophilia thoughts'. It has left me massively, ridiculously happy. (Not just, I hasten to clarify, because of the necessary paedophilia thoughts.)

Here is an illustration of an aspect of the conversation:




Yeah, it was pretty much the best thing ever.

(Other topics of conversation: Derren Brown swearing is hotter than it has any right to be; Derren Brown and the Doctor are the best duo ever (they freaking are. Our collaborative fic is now eight thousand words long and nowhere near finished and I love it so much. DERREN BROWN GETS INTO RIDICULOUS TROUBLE WHEREVER HE GOES. THE DOCTOR CANNOT TAKE HIM ANYWHERE); Derren Brown is a gigantic freak who hammers nails into his nose for fun. I have worried about the 'hammering a nail into the nose' act ever since seeing Something Wicked This Way Comes, because I can see absolutely no point at which the clearly real nail can be exchanged with a trick one, and now moogle62 has informed me that the 'trick' is, in fact, 'Derren Brown hammers a solid nail into his head'. WHO DOES THAT, DERREN BROWN? WHO THINKS 'I KNOW WHAT I SHALL DO EVERY DAY ON MY TOUR: I SHALL WALK ON GLASS AND DRIVE A NAIL INTO MY SKULL'? YOU ARE A RIDICULOUS MASOCHIST.)


(EDIT: Oh! The official Derren Brown blog is offering MP3 files of the commentary on Trick of the Mind Series One, so if you had problems accessing the commentary on your DVD (or if you just feel like listening to Derren Brown giving commentary out of context, I suppose) you may want to check that out.)

Comments

[amy-wolf.livejournal.com]

I knew he'd have a Jigglypuff! Those things are freaky!

And 'necessary paedophilia thoughts'? You're giving Derren Brown a real run for his money on the adorable-meets-unsettling thing, aren't you?

(That's not true; he's definitely got you beat at being unsettling, and you win at adorable. But if you team up, we're all doomed. Possibly you included.)

[rionaleonhart]

I should probably make it clear here that neither of us were the ones having paedophilia thoughts, necessary or otherwise.

Well, I did bring up the topic of Derren Brown kissing Will Parry from His Dark Materials, but that was because of a mishearing.

[amy-wolf.livejournal.com]

I believe you. It was mostly your weird glee about the phrase that stuck out.

Also, in my continuing effort to make everyone in the world like Top Gear, I have now resorted to watching Conan O'Brian with my friends and going "You like it when he destroys chunks of the set with axes and big hammers? You know what other show you'd probably like?"

[cryforthemoon.livejournal.com]

I realise that the scale is a bit messed-up, but I'm hoping you will find this amusing nonetheless.

(http://smg.photobucket.com/albums/v622/cryforthemoon/?action=view&current=poke.jpg)

[rionaleonhart]

THIS IS ENTIRELY AMAZING. I love it! (A pocket-sized Abra would probably be able to explain some of Derren's tricks.)

[cryforthemoon.livejournal.com]

:D Derren Brown + Pokemon = something that can never be wrong. (Damnit, now I have a mental image of an Abra doing things like reading the Daily Mail.)

[serriadh.livejournal.com]

I do not know about pokemons. WOE

the angle of his head in that pic is very... striking. *Wants*

[cryforthemoon.livejournal.com]

Get thee to a Pokedex. ;)

I am not encouraging you at all. (http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v622/cryforthemoon/006d4r6y.jpg) The man has a neck made of porn, I swear.

Proving things with SKIENCE!

[serriadh.livejournal.com]

I want to see this fic!

I can see how you could hammer a nail in without doing, er, lasting damage, I think. It's like sword-eating (did you know they ACTUALLY do that!)

Apparently, according to a friend of mine who's done it, if you do it right, glass-walking doesn't hurt (Ha!). She says the really difficult thing is staying aware enough to step on the deepest bits of glass, scrunch your foot down before putting your weight on, whilst simulataneously being calm and trance-y enough not to totally freak out. (Also, I read somewhere, Derren was a bit ill one night - coughing and spluttering earlier - and cut his feet doing the glass thing. I suppose that's why it's near the interval. OMIGOD HE'S SUCH A FREAK)

I think Andy Nyman came up with those ideas for a sick joke or as revenge for something horrid Derren did to him. 'Hey, Derren! You know what would make your new tour script really great? If you inflict loads of pain on yourself while I watch and laugh a bit'

Re: Proving things with SKIENCE!

[rionaleonhart]

I want to show the world this fic! But so far only the bit in the Pokémon world is finished. We've got another, oh, at least six fandoms to get through, and all the connecty bits, and basically I have no idea when the Time-Travelling Cross-Fandom Adventures of the Doctor and Derren Brown will be in a postable state.

Even if glass-walking doesn't hurt, I do not understand why someone would do it. It is bizarre! Derren Brown is a strange, strange man.

(Also, I read somewhere, Derren was a bit ill one night - coughing and spluttering earlier - and cut his feet doing the glass thing.

...my first thought upon reading this probably should not have been 'adhgjfhdgh hot'.)

Hee, I rather like the Revenge of Nyman idea.

Have you seen the behind-the-scenes bit on the Something Wicked DVD? With the crisp-walking?

Re: Proving things with SKIENCE!

[serriadh.livejournal.com]

That was my thought, too. And, yeah, very very strange to want to do it. (I was providing anecdotage rather than trying to explain how DVB is TOTALLY NORMAL REALLY).

Well, probably that shouldn't have been your first thought, no. On the other hand, at least it makes two of us.

I have not seen that! I have, er, acquired Something Wicked rather than buying it because I am evil. I DID NOT KNOW THERE WERE EXTRAS

[deirdre-c.livejournal.com]

*pops in utterly random*

Ha! I have absolutely no idea what's going on in your post, but that picture automatically had me thinking of this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A_B5UrI7nAI

[rionaleonhart]

That... that is the most tragic video I have ever seen. (Hee!)

[dracothelizard.livejournal.com]

So, how many crossovers does the Doctor'n'Derren fic involve?

[rionaleonhart]

In the present plan? Derren Brown and the Doctor drop into Pokémon, Merlin, Sherlock Holmes, Supernatural, The League of Gentlemen, His Dark Materials and Silent Hill. The Pokémon section is the only one that has been completed so far.

[dracothelizard.livejournal.com]

Where's the Top Gear crossover?

I am also vaguely interested in what Derren sees in Silent Hill. "Hey, Pyramid Head! Yeah, sure, stab me, I don't care."

And hahaha, does Sam do a bit of OMG YOU ARE A MAGICIAN OF SORTS awesome fanboying? He should! And Dean should want to shoot Derren with rocksalt, and attempt to sneakily mutter Christo around him and throw salt at him secretly.

[vzg.livejournal.com]

Meeerrrlin! Well, now it's settled: I have to read this. (His Dark Materials is also a heady tempter, but Merlin would get me to say yes to many ridiculous things.)

[lo0o0ony-lauren.livejournal.com]

God, the nail thing, yes. The magician I lived with in Edinburgh was training himself to do it while we were up there, putting vaseline on chopsticks and forrrcing them in; it's just an entirely freakish willpower thing. The trick to it, of course, is that people think your nasal canals go UP when of course they go BACK, so it looks even wronger when you're watching it, though actually it's just a case of making things go in holes that aren't entirely designed to accommodate them. Like anal sex. (Something I imagine DVB is equally impressive at.)

[amy-wolf.livejournal.com]

actually it's just a case of making things go in holes that aren't entirely designed to accommodate them. Like anal sex.

Nails up your nose: like anal sex, in a way.

[saaski-moql.livejournal.com]

Posts like this should probably not make me laugh this hard XD

[nixwilliams.livejournal.com]

this reminds me to ask you if you know about obama's elf (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A_B5UrI7nAI)?

[shark-hat.livejournal.com]

Actual true fact: Sylvester McCoy can also hammer nails up his nose (there is FOOTAGE. He used to be part of Ken Campbell's Massively Disturbing Circus[1].)

Soooo... A, do skills that the Doctor's actors have become things that the Doctor can do? B, do they then carry across regenerations? Because, frankly, a scene where Ten and Derren sit around and hammer nails up their noses would be AMAZING.

[1]Not its real name but should have been.

[rionaleonhart]

Because, frankly, a scene where Ten and Derren sit around and hammer nails up their noses would be AMAZING.

This mental image utterly delights me. It probably should not, but it does.

[make-a-move.livejournal.com]

If Derren Brown doesn't have a Jigglypuff when I go and see him in May, I will genuinely be sorely disappointed.

[rionaleonhart]

I think it will probably be for the best if he does not have a Jigglypuff, because if he does it will probably send you to sleep and you will miss the performance.