EXPLOSION OF LOVE.

[rionaleonhart]

Dear Anonymous Benefactor:

asfdgddjjhgadkjghagjfgjdfhgjfgjhgh thank you so much! PLEASE STEP FORWARD SO I CAN HUG YOU A LOT AND, I DON'T KNOW, WRITE YOU FANFICTION OR SOMETHING. Seriously, is there anything I can do for you?

(The icons! The polls! The advertlessness! The ability to edit comments! Oh, paid account, I have missed you.)

Because I feel like spreading the joy: please comment, whether you are my anonymous benefactor or not, with a concept you would really like me to write, and I shall attempt a sentence or a snippet or something of it. If I cannot manage it, I shall just tell you something I like about you. Possibly I shall do both.

(♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥)

Comments

[brewsternorth.livejournal.com]

Okay! Glad to hear your LJ-mojo is back!

Top Gear RPS/Derren Brown RPS, Hammond meets Derren. Lots of squee but no hypnotism occurs.

[rionaleonhart]

Richard's not sure what to think. On the one hand, Derren Brown is fascinating, and Richard loves watching his shows. On the other, after his experience with Paul McKenna, Richard sort of never wants to be near another hypnotist again.

"I wouldn't really call myself a hypnotist," Derren says, thoughtfully, when Richard tells him this.

"You can mess with people's minds, though," Richard points out.

"Well, yes," Derren concedes. "Yes, I can do that."

The conversation is a bit awkward, because Richard automatically flinches away whenever Derren looks like he might be about to touch him. Derren has said he won't do anything to him, but Richard can't stop himself. Derren has the tact not to comment on the jumpiness, although he does smirk a bit.

Richard tries to keep himself from asking, because it seems a bit evil, but in the end he can't resist. Jeremy did leave him to the mercy of McKenna, after all. "Could you do something to Jeremy?"

-
Somehow, although Derren freely confesses that he has no licence and runs off the track three times, he ends up at the top of the leader board.

That evening, Jeremy orders a Reliant Robin on eBay.

Richard decides that hypnotists aren't so bad.

[amy-wolf.livejournal.com]

Yay, you! Yay paid time! You are awesome and you deserve it.

Also, TGS stuff - Richard is pregnant. By Jeremy, by the Stig, by a car, or anything.

(And if you want to give me a hint about how to get fic into the "Uncategorized for reasons I cannot reveal here" category, it would not go unappreciated. Or, you know, share information about disability organizations that really want to collaborate with My Two Friends In Mongolia. Whichever.)

[lasayla.livejournal.com]

I thought that was the category for 'This totally fits into one of the existing crackfic categories, but I can't say which category without spoiling the awesome twist ending' stories.

[wanttobeatree.livejournal.com]

:O NOW YOU CAN REUPLOAD PANICKED DUMBLEDORE. AND ALSO THE DISGRUNTLED RUSSIAN BABY.

I kind of think you should write a fic in which the 66th seal is broken and Lucifer is released, BUT WAIT WHAT IS THIS he's Derren Brown.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_afterism/]

I SECOND THIS.

[(Anonymous)]

Glad you like it. You are wonderful, and deserve it. Be happy and enjoy it. That's all I want.

- Your anonymous benefactor

[brewsternorth.livejournal.com]

...may I just say you rock even if I don't know who you are?

[uk-sef.livejournal.com]

You appear to need some semi-colons on those hearts.

[rionaleonhart]

So I did! Thank you! They were showing up in Firefox, oddly enough, but not in Internet Explorer.

[invisiblecake.livejournal.com]

Yay anonymous people! Yay paid account of awesome!

I have no idea for a snippet except for something with Top Gear, which seems to be the norm for me. I just love it so much!

[apiphile.livejournal.com]

Creepy creepy fic about Derren Brown bloodbending, added points for doing it in RL rather than Avatar?

[rionaleonhart]

Sarah has always been half-convinced that Derren Brown uses stooges in all of his work, but apparently not. She rather wishes she were finding out in some other way.

"You can get down any time you like," Derren says. "You just have to believe you can."

Sarah tries very hard to believe that she can get down. It's not easy. She can feel her entire body straining against gravity, as if some inside force is pulling her upwards, and the longer she stays up here the weaker, the less able to resist it she feels.

"You don't really believe it," Derren says. "That's not going to work."

"I'm believing as hard as I can!" Sarah shouts. She feels dizzy and ill. Her vision is starting to blacken around the edges.

Derren tilts his head. "Yes," he says, although Sarah is feeling no more confident in her ability to fight her suspension, "that's it," and a moment later Sarah drops to the ground.

Sarah stays there, curled up on the forest floor, until her vision begins to clear. Derren puts a hand on her back, and when she looks up he smiles at her.

"You see," Derren says, "it's all suggestion. You expected to be pulled in a particular direction, and so you subconsciously moved yourself. There's nothing telekinetic or supernatural about it."

He actually seems to believe what he's saying. Sarah has a suspicion that no amount of suggestion could have made her subconsciously pull herself into the empty air and hang there for three minutes, but she is a little afraid of contradicting him.

"You said you could only do this at the full moon," she says, cautiously, getting to her feet. "Was that just for effect, then?"

Derren looks slightly surprised, as if the reason should be obvious. "Well, the full moon makes people more suggestible."

"Ah," Sarah says. "Of course." She attempts to move surreptitiously away, but Derren raises a hand and she stops.

"I imagine you'll want a cup of tea after that," he says, with a smile that is probably intended to reassure her.

Really, what Sarah wants to do is get as far away from Derren as possible, but she cannot move. Derren appears unaware of this. She doesn't want to bring it up.

"This way, then," Derren says, starting away through the trees, and Sarah's body follows him of its own accord.

[bouncywild.livejournal.com]

Anonymous never pays for me. ;____;

That's really kind, though! WHOEVER YOU MAY BE - YOU ARE A STAR.

Please tell me that you're donning fancy dress for Asylum Con's parties!

[th-esaurus.livejournal.com]

Here is my comment. I would like. A sentence or snippet. Of John Winchester/Dean Winchester. Yes. I went there.

(These are my thoughts on incest.)

[nomelon.livejournal.com]

Anonymous benefactors are truly marvellous. I've had the same and I WANT TO KNOW WHO THEY ARE BECAUSE THEY MADE ME FEEL ALL SQUISHY INSIDE.

Ahem. Enjoy the perks of being awesome, and I hope to see DRB in the future.

If you're taking prompts from just anyone, I'd kind of love a few lines of teeny!Sam. It's been far too long.

[rionaleonhart]

Pfft, you are not 'just anyone'!

I actually wrote these snippets a little while ago as part of a fic I never finished, so tell me if you've seen it before and I'll try to write something new.



There's a knock on the door, and Bobby comes in, stepping easily over the salt line. Jo smiles; it's been a while since she last saw him.

"Hey, Bobby. What can I get for you?"

"Most alcoholic thing you got," Bobby says, and that's when she notices that he's holding something.

"What's that?"

"Take a look."

The life of a hunter, Jo knows, can be a pretty weird one; she's seen people come into the Roadhouse with ailments from goats' horns to uncontrollable bursting into song. Still, she really can't say she's expecting the thing in Bobby's cupped hands to be a tiny Dean Winchester.

"Um," Jo says.

"I want beer," tiny Dean says. "And don't give it to me in a thimble or any crap like that. I want a glass I can swim in."

"I'm guessing this is the real Dean, then?" Jo asks, staring. "Not some kind of... miniature shapeshifter?"

"Far as we know," Bobby says. "No reaction to salt, holy water - "

"I had a reaction to holy water," Dean interrupts. "My reaction was 'what the hell, stop throwing holy water at me'."

"Anyway," Bobby says, setting Dean carefully down on the countertop and taking Sam out of his pocket -

Wait. Back up.

Bobby just took Sam Winchester out of his jacket pocket. Sam Winchester, who's about eleven feet tall and could probably eclipse the sun with one of his gigantic hands. Except, apparently, not any more.

"Sam?" Jo asks.

Sam looks completely miserable. "Hey, Jo," he says, in a voice even quieter and more broken-down than she'd have expected from someone of his inexplicable size.




Hunters tend to be a pretty superstitious bunch, because a sceptic's never going to last long in this line of work, and so they generally try not to say or think anything that would be tempting fate. Things like Easy job or Well, at least it can't get any worse. If there's one thing Sam's learned in all his years of being a Winchester, it's that it can always, always get worse.

Sometimes, though, you just can't help yourself.

Well, at least it can't get any worse, Sam thinks, three seconds before someone brings a bag down over his head.

-
When Sam wakes up, he is in a cage.

There is a hamster wheel directly in front of him.

Sam hates everything.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_afterism/]

:D!

I'd love to see fic where Derren Brown teams up with The Real Hustle people. Especially as it's already happened (http://derrenbrownart.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2008/12/p-640-480-6a77cd1d-e0d5-4d4e-bd8f-75dc1101a44b.jpeg).

[emmarrrrr.livejournal.com]

I MAY HAVE SORT OF VERY NEARLY SQUEALED ALOUD AT THIS PICTURE.

[make-a-move.livejournal.com]

I think that a Derren Brown/Scrubs crossover would be rather fantabulous.

[emmarrrrr.livejournal.com]

I AM HAPPY FOR YOU. (i am not your anonymous benefactor, because i am skint. broke. bankrupt. alas.)

I CAN HAS SOME TIME-TRAVELLING SKY PIRATES? I miss them. IF YOU FEEL LIKE THROWING DERREN BROWN IN THERE (HE WOULD FIND A WAY TO GET TO IVALICE, SOMEHOW) I HAVE NO OBJECTIONS. [/subtle]

[rionaleonhart]

When Derren's vision begins to clear, he finds himself lying on a metal floor. There are two men standing over him. One of them is wearing extraordinarily silly shoes.

"Jack," the man with peculiar taste in footwear says, "your teleportation device was supposed to call Fran here."

"Uh," the other man, presumably named Jack, says. His accent is American. "That's right."

"Unless I am very much mistaken, this gentleman is not Fran."

"I can send him back, or I can give it another go," Jack says. "Only enough power to do one. It'll take a few hours to charge it up again."

"Try Fran, in that case," the man who is not Jack says. "I can't imagine she's having much fun in prison. And do try to pick up the correct person this time; I only have so much room aboard my ship."

The less silly pair of shoes moves away. Now that there is only one mysterious man staring at him, Derren feels slightly more ready to tackle the situation. Whatever this situation is.

"Er," Derren ventures, "hello."

"Ah, you're awake," not-Jack says. "And Archadian, from the sound of your voice. Would you like to stand, or are you comfortable as you are?"

Derren takes not-Jack's hand and manages to pull himself to his feet. "Archadian?" he asks.

"I suppose you would say so," not-Jack says, "but I don't have any particular political affiliation. My name's Balthier, if you've heard of me."

Derren has a vague feeling that there has been some sort of misunderstanding, but he doesn't really feel mentally capable of pursuing meaning at the moment. "Derren."

"I take it you haven't heard of me, then," Balthier says, with a slight smile. "That will probably make our acquaintance easier."

Now that Derren is no longer at his shoe-level, he can see that the entirety of Balthier's attire is in fact fairly strange. He notes the colourful jewellery on Balthier's left hand with mild interest, before remembering that there are more important issues to consider. "Can you tell me what just happened to me?"

"Who is this?" a strangely-accented voice asks, before Balthier can answer.

Derren turns to see a woman standing behind him. She is tall and dark-skinned and, more strikingly, has two enormous rabbit ears rising through the black helmet she wears. She also appears to be clad almost entirely in sparse pieces of metal.

"Er," Derren says, which isn't terribly charming but is all he can really come up with when unexpectedly faced with an almost-nude rabbit-woman.

"This is Derren, our latest unintentional acquisition," Balthier says, with what Derren feels is a most unfair level of amusement audible in his voice, "and, Derren, this is Fran." He smirks. "Not familiar with Viera?"

Derren looks in slight desperation over at Jack, who has returned with Fran. At least he is slightly normally dressed.

"Where'd you come from?" Jack asks.

Derren is tempted to say that surely they would know, as they have apparently kidnapped him from there. "Well, I was walking down Oxford Street a moment ago."

"You're gonna have to be more specific. Town, city, political territory?"

Derren blinks. "...London?"

"Earth?" Jack demands.

Ah, so the man in fairly ordinary dress is also a lunatic. Fantastic.

[iwrotethissong.livejournal.com]

Hee, lucky you!!

[lotus0kid.livejournal.com]

The Top Gear Trio out in the boonies of Florida, zipping around on racing lawn mowers, please! Also, congrats and enjoy your paid account.

[misskass.livejournal.com]

Derren Brown on Derren Brown sexytimes, because a trick where he's in two places at once goes horribly wrong.

Also I want to know what you like about me~

[honeymull.livejournal.com]

This is sadly unrelated to the anonymous awesomeness with which you have been blessed, but I may or may not have about fifteen tabs of Derren Brown youtube clips open in the window next to this one.

And. I may or may not be totally charmed/utterly terrified after watching three clips so far.

Oh god.

[rionaleonhart]

I am utterly, utterly delighted. Victory! Please tell me your thoughts!

Also, I like you because you are a lunatic who makes entries about Jensen and Jared being trapped in educational children's games at two in the morning. I feel that such things enrich my friendspage. I KNOW THAT YOU DID NOT LEAVE A FIC PROMPT, BUT I AM TELLING YOU THIS ANYWAY.

[dracothelizard.livejournal.com]

Team Top Gear in Avatar world! There would be so much destruction :D

And YAY paid time :D

[rhosyndu.livejournal.com]

Why has no one asked for a snippet where Albus Dumbledore meets the Creepy Russian Baby (and it's secretly Derren Brown) yet?

Your f'list is slipping, Riona. (Though also rather wonderful.)

[serriadh.livejournal.com]

YAY! What wonderful friends you hav

If you could manage some Derren Brown self-doubt of any sort at all, I'd love you forever. Particularly if he thinks a trick is going wrong. Or it involves his slightly sick kinks.

[timydamonkey.livejournal.com]

Obviously there needs to exist a Supernatural/Fullmetal Alchemist crossover. Even if only in snippets!

[vzg.livejournal.com]

My first impulse was to ask for Dr. Girlfriend/Iron Man but I'm afraid you might not know who Dr. Girlfriend is. :[

My second impulse was to ask for Derren Brown/your brother but, while I may sometimes be mean, I am not that mean. Usually.

So I shall go with my third impulse, which was "ANY ONE OF THESE PLEASE"—

Derren Brown/Sokka (possibly with Derren as some sort of teacher to him)
Derren Brown/Sam Winchester (I am in none of these fandoms what is wrong with me)
Sam Winchester/Sokka (mostly because I don't want all the options to include Derren Brown or else I might feel a bit crazy)
Derren Brown/Neil Patrick Harris

[newbie1990.livejournal.com]

Rionarionariona it happened to me toooo!

Um, do you know anything about Merlin? If so, ANYTHING ABOUT MERLIN. If not, um...Top Gear bantering?

[vzg.livejournal.com]

I change my request to be also Merlin! MUAHAHA!

[bubbles-san.livejournal.com]

Is three days late too late? Because my computer's not working, but I'd still love to see you attempt one-sentence Kutner/Cole. (They're lovemuffins! Loooovemuuuuffiiiins!)

Also, congrats on the paid time.

[bubbles-san.livejournal.com]

Also, having just read your previous entry, how about Derren Brown teaming up with Test Card Girl?

[wanttobeatree.livejournal.com]

I SAW THIS IN TODAY'S F!S AND I THOUGHT OF YOU:

[rionaleonhart]

WELL, THEY CLEARLY ARE.