But being a git is precisely what one would want from Brooker!

(Your dreams are sort of absorbing the anonymeme. Wow.)

I've got stairs.

I vaguely remember from lazy stalking when I watched Who Do You Think You Are? that he has stairs outside his front door. Er. I'm not sure that actually counts as having stairs, never mind being a good excuse to use that as a chat-up line. Would you screw him on possibly non-existent stairs, Riona? Is that appealing to you?