rionaleonhart

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RAGE.

So. I've been following Doctor Who, missing Captain Jack hugely but secure in the knowledge that at least he'll be in the 2007 series. And then the BBC releases this.

Returning cast members include John Barrowman who will be making an appearance in the series finale.

What?

No, seriously. What?

I have no idea how I managed to fall completely and hopelessly and utterly in love with a character who only appeared in five episodes, but I did. I spent the entirety of the 2006 series desperately hoping that he would put in an appearance despite the BBC's claims to the contrary, but he didn't. Admittedly hoping for something that the BBC had explicitly denied may have been a bit silly, but I hoped for it regardless. We had been promised that he would return in 2007, however, so I was patient.

And now we find out that he's only going to be in the finale?

We're not even promised anything remotely substantial! 'Make an appearance' is an alarming phrase - as other people have mentioned, Tennant 'made an appearance' in Parting of the Ways. At best, it sounds like he'll show up at the very end, say 'hi' and then the credits will roll and we'll have to wait until 2008 for any real Captain Jack-ness. At worst, it sounds like he'll show up briefly and then leave Doctor Who again, never to return.

I AM INDESCRIBABLY DISTRESSED BY THIS. I LOVE CAPTAIN JACK AND CANNOT ENDURE BEING SO CRUELLY DEPRIVED OF HIM. I didn't like this year's series nearly as much as last year's, and, while that may be mainly because of the change in Doctors, Captain Jack being present would undoubtedly have improved it.

I WANT HIM BACK I WANT HIM BACK DAMMIT. THE OT3 BEING DESTROYED WASN'T ENOUGH? YOU HAVE TO MAKE US WAIT UNTIL THE FINALE FOR JACK TO RETURN? ONE EPISODE, TWO AT THE MOST, AND HE'S JUST 'MAKING AN APPEARANCE'? SO NOT FAIR.

Martha had better be the awesomest companion ever. And also Mickey and Jake should come back even though that would make no sense whatsoever. Come on, BBC, enough cruelty. Do something unexpectedly nice for once.

If Torchwood is not fantastic, I will destroy the BBC offices.

In less rage-filled news, I am now really very curious about how many fandoms Top Gear can be crossed over with.

kadrin's written the beginning of a Top Gear/Utena fic,

dracothelizard is working on Top Gear/Stargate/Doctor Who (the Stig is a Timelord whose TARDIS has the form of a Reliant Robin! Genius!), and I've written a quite alarming amount of a Top Gear/Harry Potter fic and may have sort of written a Top Gear/Silent Hill snippet for

gayjunglefever's birthday. I've never known such an unlikely crossover fandom.

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Dammit. This is really disappointing, but also exactly what I've been expecting all along. I had a feeling the stuff about him being back for season three was too good to be true.

That is unbelievably LAME. I can't say I'm entirely surprised, though. Rubbish BBC.

Don't panic, dearest. Torchwood will be awesome. Awesome awesome awesome. And that's thirteen whole episodes of Jack!

In less rage-filled news, I am now really very curious about how many fandoms Top Gear can be crossed over with.

...even as your crack-y crossover friend? WOMAN, YOU'RE COMPLETELY INSANE.

Oh yes, I forgot the Top Gear/Silent Hill crossover! I'll just OH MY FUCKING GOD THE INTERNET JUST CUT OUT AFTER DOWNLOADING THE LOM EPISODE FOR TWO HOURS WITH SEVEN MINUTES TO GO OH GOD I AM SO ANGRY AND UPFILE WON'T LET ME DOWNLOAD ANY MORE BECAUSE IT'S SAYING 'ONLY ONE FILE PER SESSION, RIONA, HA-HA'.

I sometimes feel like the only one in fandom who doesn't love Jack. I don't dislike him, he just does nada for me in the interest department. Then my brother watched Doctor Who and felt the same, so perhaps it's a genetic thing.

Can you think of any particular reason? Obviously I'm not going to obsessively try to convert you to the Jack-love, because a) it's really very silly to expect everyone to share my opinions, and b) it would be cruel given this latest bit of news; I'm just curious, because I think you really are the only person I've encountered in fandom who doesn't love him. (I actually didn't like him at all in The Empty Child/The Doctor Dances, but he utterly endeared himself to me in Boom Town with his manic enthusiasm and how well he fitted into the TARDIS crew.)

Half the people who hear this news seem to have anticipated it already, but it took me completely by surprise. I didn't realise I was such an optimist in relation to the other Doctor Who fans.

Well, er, at least we'll have 2008? And Torchwood, of course, but I'm really rather nervous about it. I have absolutely no idea whether it's going to be any good or not.

NO

NO NO NO NO

THAT IS RUBBISH. RUBBISH. WHAT THE HELL, SERIOUSLY. I HATE YOUR INTERNETS SO VERY, VERY MUCH.

Erm. Erm. Plan B? Can you use torrents? Because at least with those you can resume the download, and whatnot...

Oh, cripes. That is hard to answer - would be easier if I actually dislike him, which I don't. I'm just... Indifferent, uninterested. He's good-looking, sure (but not actually attractive to me) and yay on BBC for challenging some ideas on sexuality with him, but the character just doesn't interest me. I wish I could say why, but my brain can be a mystery to me too. To be fair, he's not the only character I have that sort of not-like, not-dislike to. Aragorn in Lord of the Rings, Nick in CSI, they all result in the same sort of reaction in me. This is why I don't write them much in fic either.

I'm more upset at the Doctor's stupid blue suit. It looks stupid. I liked the brown. Loved the brown. Wanted to do dirty things to the brown. Er, with him in it, obviously.

And what's all this about Top Gear/Silent Hill? Because it worries me. Not as much as Jeremy Clarkson/Stephen Fry, but still quite worrying!

I hadn't actually noticed it. That is a stupid suit.

The Top Gear/Silent Hill thing was a tiny silly snippet of a fic that I wrote, along with House/Doctor Who and, er, Clarkson/Hammond/May snippets, for

gayjunglefever. If there is a God it will never be continued, and it ran as follows:

"I don't know if you can see properly, because - as you've probably noticed - it's a bit foggy," Jeremy said loudly, addressing the camera, "but this is a very, very pretty car. If you'll remember it didn't do that well on our track, but we've decided to give it a second chance by seeing how well it performs on the road. What we wanted was a townish sort of place, but without any of those traffic jams and cyclists and pedestrians that make actually driving in a town so annoying."

He leant against the side of the car. There was an irritating crackling noise coming from somewhere behind him, but he ignored it.

"And that," he continued, spreading his hands, "is why I've come to Silent Hill."

The Stig as a Time Lord? As you said, genius. I expect to see at least one of these.

Also, I trust that there is the Anglia involved in the Harry Potter fic. And now I am wondering how well flying cars do at Quidditch, which... has kind of amused me, really. To understate it a bit.

(I am in denial about the Jack news as of right now. Mind you, I suspect that it will be their season finale trump card, much as Cybermen and so on have been. Possibly the Face of Boe will be this next season's.)

I actually haven't included the Anglia, but

littlemoose's suggestion of how Clarkson would react to it entertained me so much that I think I may have to.

Most of it is about Clarkson-on-a-broom racing Hammond-and-May-on-a-flying-carpet to Tokyo. If you're at all interested, what I've written so far is posted in a series of increasingly ridiculous snippets on this thread. There are some clips of

dracothelizard's Top Gear/Stargate/Doctor Who crossover in there as well.

Torrents completely defeat me, but fear not, for I have managed to get it downloaded! I will watch it... at some point!

Honestly, Riona, swearing? Shame on you. All it meant was waiting another two and a half hours. I thought you had more patience than that.

Well, you've used up your swearing quota for the next three years with that one word. I hope you don't regret it when something really swearable-at happens.

I do hope nobody actually sees me talking to myself here. Maybe I should screen this comment.

You are hilarious. This probably means that you disapprove of my constant mindless profanity, doesn't it?

Hoorah! I approve, and shall almost certainly prod you repeatedly until you do! *g*

"If there is a God it will never be continued, and it ran as follows:"

*hopes there is a God, even if that snippet was amusing*

Flying car Quidditch...

That would be AMAZING.

It's so true. Hee.

Oh dear. *goes off to read, with amused anticipation*

*surfaces*

...

That thread wins everything. Ever. *muffled giggles*

Seriously, though, Top Gear works with almost everything. Ehehe.

Er, right. I retract my 'if there is a God...' statement (as I may end up continuing it and, despite not believing in any, would not like to be responsible for destroying any sort of deity that might exist), and replace it with 'if Riona has any sense whatsoever'.

Y'know, I don't even want to know what sort of monsters would be in Jeremy's Silent Hill.

Well, actually I do, but I'm just going to pretend I don't to salvage what remains of my sanity.

"Seriously, though, Top Gear works with almost everything."

Scary, isn't it?

He would be haunted by the ghost of Rover. And someone who looked almost exactly like Hammond, but with less white teeth.

I'm just picturing one of them in the Anglia, trying to perform Quidditch moves, in order to test speed and maneuvering. And of course the car starts to fly by itself, because they don't actually know Quidditch.

*shakes head* Pure crack. But visually awesome.

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