Riona (
rionaleonhart) wrote2015-04-29 07:05 pm
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Minstrels From Italia? I'm Going To Enjoy This.
The entire 'The Prince's Banquet' mission in Assassin's Creed: Revelations is incredible. You beat up some minstrels (much to Ezio's delight, because he hates minstrels, and so do you, because they've been getting in your way for the past two games). You disguise yourself in their clothes. And then you distract people from all the murder taking place behind them by singing terribly.
Here is my favourite of Ezio's songs:
I am a tactless minstrel.
I sing off-key for coins.
If you spot me in the street,
Please kick me in the loins.
That alone would be enough to establish it firmly as the greatest mission in the history of Assassin's Creed, but then it ended with interaction between Ezio and Prince Suleiman, which I'd been craving since their first scene on the boat. I don't have enough hands to give this mission all the thumbs up it deserves.
I'm loving the weirdly flirty relationship between Ezio and Prince Suleiman. I thought their very first scene had an interesting sense of attraction running beneath it, and I was hoping for further conversations between them, but I really wasn't expecting Suleiman, on recognising Ezio in his minstrel disguise, to greet him with, 'It is a relief to see you again, my handsome minstrel.'
And yet, as far as I can establish, there is absolutely no Ezio/Suleiman fanfiction in existence. 'My handsome minstrel'! Vast fanbases have been built on less! And the game's been out for over three years! And it's not as if this is a small fandom! I feel genuinely betrayed.
I'm also sort of 'shipping Ezio with Sofia. And with my favourite of my Assassin recruits, an acrobatic young lady named Levi. (I've criticised some of the alterations to gameplay in Revelations, but the opportunity to go on missions with your recruits is a fantastic addition. I can get emotionally attached to my recruits and then work together with them and have conversations!) There definitely won't be any fanfiction pairing him up with the randomly-generated Assassin recruit unique to my game, tragically. BUT AT LEAST THERE'S AN EXCUSE FOR THAT. THERE IS NO EXCUSE FOR THIS LACK OF EZIO/SULEIMAN THE MAGNIFICENT.
(Whilst I'm talking about ill-advised Assassin's Creed 'ships: is anyone else half-convinced that Shaun, Lucy and Rebecca ended up in some sort of weird three-way romance while Desmond was in the Animus during Brotherhood? I - I need to know I'm not alone in this.)
Here is my favourite of Ezio's songs:
I am a tactless minstrel.
I sing off-key for coins.
If you spot me in the street,
Please kick me in the loins.
That alone would be enough to establish it firmly as the greatest mission in the history of Assassin's Creed, but then it ended with interaction between Ezio and Prince Suleiman, which I'd been craving since their first scene on the boat. I don't have enough hands to give this mission all the thumbs up it deserves.
I'm loving the weirdly flirty relationship between Ezio and Prince Suleiman. I thought their very first scene had an interesting sense of attraction running beneath it, and I was hoping for further conversations between them, but I really wasn't expecting Suleiman, on recognising Ezio in his minstrel disguise, to greet him with, 'It is a relief to see you again, my handsome minstrel.'
And yet, as far as I can establish, there is absolutely no Ezio/Suleiman fanfiction in existence. 'My handsome minstrel'! Vast fanbases have been built on less! And the game's been out for over three years! And it's not as if this is a small fandom! I feel genuinely betrayed.
I'm also sort of 'shipping Ezio with Sofia. And with my favourite of my Assassin recruits, an acrobatic young lady named Levi. (I've criticised some of the alterations to gameplay in Revelations, but the opportunity to go on missions with your recruits is a fantastic addition. I can get emotionally attached to my recruits and then work together with them and have conversations!) There definitely won't be any fanfiction pairing him up with the randomly-generated Assassin recruit unique to my game, tragically. BUT AT LEAST THERE'S AN EXCUSE FOR THAT. THERE IS NO EXCUSE FOR THIS LACK OF EZIO/SULEIMAN THE MAGNIFICENT.
(Whilst I'm talking about ill-advised Assassin's Creed 'ships: is anyone else half-convinced that Shaun, Lucy and Rebecca ended up in some sort of weird three-way romance while Desmond was in the Animus during Brotherhood? I - I need to know I'm not alone in this.)
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Okay, I haven't even played the game, and I already want Ezio/Suleiman fanfic.
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"Ezio, do you have some time to spare...in bed? I would like your opinion on something...in bed." "Meet me when you are ready...in bed." (This is me being totally logical!)
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If you do pick up the series, be aware that the first game is rather repetitive and the second is a huge improvement in just about every respect. I had fun with the first, but I don't think I'd ever be able to go back to it after playing the other games in the series. The good news, if the first game doesn't work for you, is that you can jump in at the second without really missing much story-wise, as the bulk of the second game is in a completely different setting with a completely different main character.
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Enjoy it! You say 'trilogy'; do you mean the Assassin's Creed II trilogy (II, Brotherhood, Revelations), or do you mean I, II and III? If you mean the latter, I'm afraid the order of games goes I, II, Brotherhood, Revelations and then III. This series makes no sense at all.
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Man, i want someone to sing ezio's sing there at my damn funeral, it's perfect.
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