You've Got To Dress To Depress.

[rionaleonhart]

My quest to introduce Tem to the Kingdom Hearts series is almost at an end; we've made it to Kingdom Hearts III!

It's weird that these games think there always has to be a plot reason for characters to change clothes. Riku can't just decide he's in the mood to wear gingham; he's required to put on special gingham clothes that protect him against darkness.

The Toy Story world opens with a fake advertisement for a game called Verum Rex. It doesn't match Kingdom Hearts either visually or tonally, and it is incredibly disconcerting. 'What is happening??' Tem demanded. 'Riona, stop laughing and answer me!'

When I first played Kingdom Hearts III, I genuinely thought for a moment that Square had decided to stick an advertisement for another game in the middle of it. I wouldn't put it past them!

When the Toy Story world kicked off, I ran around Andy's room, testing what I could play with. Could I move the balls? Yes. Could I ride on the skateboard? No. But, hey, I could push these letter blocks around! The physics were a bit awkward and it would take some finesse, but maybe I could spell something out with them?




Proud of my work, I took an in-game photograph and sent it to th_esaurus over the PlayStation chat function. 'RD won't like this,' I commented aloud. 'Toy Story is her most beloved childhood film.'

'I like that you just sent it with no explanation,' Tem said, 'particularly as the last message in your chat was from 2022.'

(I don't think RD has seen the message yet, alas, so I can't report on her reaction! That or she's decided to respond with stony silence, which would be extremely fair.)

Having spent a good ten minutes rearranging the blocks, I finally embarked on the actual plot.

Riona: Okay! Let's help these toys find their missing loved ones.
Tem: Imagine if someone came to our house, and we went, 'Oh, thank God you're here; Rei has been kidnapped,' and they went, 'Don't worry, I'm here to help.' And then they spent two hours spelling out rude words with our fridge magnets and giggling.
Riona: Taking photos to send to their friends, with us in the background.

Tem absolutely lost it laughing when 'Let It Go' started up in the Frozen world. Elsa singing passionately over visuals of Donald Duck and Goofy trudging through the snow.

Sora comes across as weirdly in love with Elsa. I suppose that might just be a consequence of him doing his 'hi! we're friends now!' thing to someone who isn't receptive to it at all. Usually, the Disney characters he meets goes 'yep, we're friends!' and then they hang out. It feels very different when he goes 'we're friends now!' and Elsa goes 'no, I need everyone to stay away from me' and then Sora spends several hours worrying about her from afar.

It must be very weird for Kristoff to have Donald Duck and Goofy shipping him with Anna. 'If Donald Duck showed up and started shipping me and Rei,' Tem commented, 'I think we'd have to break up immediately.'

Comments

[wolfy_writing]

Riku can't just decide he's in the mood to wear gingham; he's required to put on special gingham clothes that protect him against darkness.

Is that not how you pick your wardrobe?

'I like that you just sent it with no explanation,' Tem said, 'particularly as the last message in your chat was from 2022.'

True friendship!

It feels very different when he goes 'we're friends now!' and Elsa goes 'no, I need everyone to stay away from me' and then Sora spends several hours worrying about her from afar.

Aw!

[rionaleonhart]

The plot reasons for changing clothes in Kingdom Hearts vary from 'your old clothes are too small for you and also don't have the power to magically turn you into a lion cub' to 'you need to wear more gingham or you'll be corrupted by darkness' to 'the villains hijacked your clothes and put an X symbol on your T-shirt because that lets them... track you... somehow?' and, I'll be honest, you're right: that is exactly how I choose my wardrobe.

[wolfy_writing]

And it works! You haven't been corrupted by darkness, have you? That proves you're wearing the correct amount of gingham!

[storme]

If you don't know the backstory of Verum Rex, it started as Final Fantasy Versus XIII (and part of the FFXIII broader universe). Eventually--very, very eventually--that game became FFXV.

There's a necessarily-long explanation of that here: https://verum-rex.fandom.com/wiki/Final_Fantasy_Versus_XIII

The TL;DR version is that Nomura's Versus XIII was thematically very dark (to the point of edgelordiness, frankly) with a lot of black, skulls, several pivotal betrayals, and protagonists who worshipped a goddess of death. When Versus was reworked into XV (partly so it could then be launched on the new PS4 platform, partly because the scale of the open-world had outgrown the XIII engine anyway) most of that background was ditched, as was Nomura as director and any connections to XIII or Kingdom Hearts. Nomura has been bitter ever since. Verum Rex is very close to his original vision, Yozora is the 'original' version of Noctis, and so on.

More importantly: Versus XIII was intended to be *explicitly* linked to Kingdom Hearts, with Kingdom Heart's Sora as one of the, sigh, thirteen main characters in Versus XIII. That makes the tonal dissonance when Verum Rex shows up in Kingdom Hearts SO much weirder to me.

[storme]

(basically, once you know what Verum Rex is doing in Kingdom Hearts, it does not get even slightly less weird.)

[rionaleonhart]

I was aware of the link between Verum Rex and Versus XIII, but I had no idea Sora was intended to be a character in Versus XIII! That is absolutely bizarre. As is so often the case in Kingdom Hearts, it turns out that the situation is much weirder than I could ever have imagined.

[lokifan]

Sora being meant to be a character in it is one of the main things I've retained about Versus, heh. It's so weird and hilarious.

I personally choose my clothes based largely on whether I want to fight darkness or attract it. Today is a fluffy pink-and-white jumper day, so I think I'm with the forces of light!

[necrophilia]

Man, I have such grim memories of the Frozen level. A full (and, it must be said, wholly unnecessary) performance of Let It Go! Having to climb the same visually uninteresting ice tower four times! The Olaf search and rescue! I had to get tipsy to finish that part of the game.

Also, why aren't we friends on the PSN? I am deeply hurt now.

[rionaleonhart]

I've frequently found myself thinking about how much you hated the Frozen level on this replay!

We should definitely be PSN friends! My username on there is rixareth.

[necrophilia]

Added! You'll know it's me because of the terrifying witch userpic.

[seleneheart]

Kingdom Hearts 3 was a complete letdown in our household. Although the bar was set pretty high but it seemed like it was rushed out without much care or thought to what went before.

I know something that took 13 years seeming rushed is a weird statement, but I don't know how else to put it.

[rionaleonhart]

I have a complicated relationship with Kingdom Hearts III. I love so much about it! The animation is great; the dialogue is lively; the environments are gorgeous. And yet it also disappointed me in a lot of little ways, particularly the way it handled the relationship between Sora, Riku and Kairi. It really does seem rushed in some aspects.

[rosa_heartlily]

I'm enjoying you enjoying KH :D

[rionaleonhart]

Ha, I'm glad! It's always such a fun series to revisit.

[ryulynn]

yay for more KH updates! I wonder how Tem will feel about KH3 when you guys finish. I can't believe it is years ago at this point...

And like I never thought about it until now but yeah I really don't want Donald Duck actively shipping me with someone, that's just so strange lol

[rionaleonhart]

It's been so much fun to introduce these weird games to someone new!

Don't tell us we're as perfect for each other as you and Daisy, Donald. You and Daisy have only had one scene together in the entirety of Kingdom Hearts, if I recall correctly, and she was scolding you in it.

[apiphile]

I would not have picked Gingham as the darkness protection clothing, personally, but okay.

[rionaleonhart]

Long black leather coats also offer darkness protection, apparently, so at least you have some fashion options if you're trying to avoid being corrupted by the darkness.

[apiphile]

Well, thank goodness for that

[ai]

I am learning so much about KH from your posts (and perhaps they aren't the right things to learn, who knows, but they are extremely entertaining things to learn!)

Sora x Elsa sounds like it would be a cute little ship though... I never entertained the thought of Sora hooking up with anyone from the Disney side of it, but I'm reminded of all those meme images of Goofy comforting villains so that kind of peaks my interest.

I don't know much about Frozen other than what I glean from Disney Dreamlight Valley, but Kristoff seems to have a high tolerance for shenanigans. I think he could probably handle goofy animals shipping him with other living beings. Maybe?!

[rionaleonhart]

I'm glad you're enjoying the second-hand Kingdom Hearts experience!

I can't find any fanfiction tagged with Sora/Elsa on AO3, and I find myself weirdly disappointed by this. I'm probably not going to write one-sided Sora/Elsa myself, but it really feels like it should exist!

Kristoff seems to have a high tolerance for shenanigans. I think he could probably handle goofy animals shipping him with other living beings.

You make a good point! He pretends to converse with a reindeer on a regular basis; he's probably better equipped than most to cope with being shipped by a duck.

[ai]

I know I'm emotional right now, but I'm dying of embarrassment I put peaks instead of piques... I'M EXPIRING.

It surprises me to hear there's no Sora/Elsa when both are involved in pretty in-depth crossovers (FF/KH and whatever that Rise of the Brave Tangled Dragons things is)!! But huh, I didn't know they had some KH background together... it kind of explains their DDV history since you unlock Kristoff via a quest involving Donald Duck!

[horselizard]

delighted with your letter block achievement XD

[rionaleonhart]

Thank you! At first I was just gathering letter blocks, trying to work out what could be done with them; I was delighted that this was the first possible word I spotted.

[julijournal]

It feels very different when he goes 'we're friends now!' and Elsa goes 'no, I need everyone to stay away from me' and then Sora spends several hours worrying about her from afar.

sad marshmallow music in the distance

EDIT to add link after realizing its description only made sense to me: This plays when Mallow is told he is not a tadpole.

[rionaleonhart]

He really seemed to be pining! I'm sorry, Sora, but I don't think Elsa is into you. You've had exactly one interaction, in which you introduced yourselves, she asked you to leave, and then she attacked you with ice and ran away.

[newbie1990]

Irrelevant to this entry & possibly you have already seen, but this fic has a fascinating theory on waffle parties I thought I'd share!

[rionaleonhart]

Ooh, thank you for the recommendation! I've enjoyed some of the author's other Severance fics; I'll take a look.