See, I agree with you, but not quite for the same reasons. I think there was intended to be subtext there- the comment about harassment in the first episode, Ianto saying he didn't care what Jack's sexuality was (which to me was a silent "I'd fancy him anyway")- but like you say, it wasn't enough, and also it wasn't consistently done. The subtext level was the same as on any show where people end up slashing the nearest two attractive male characters, which in my opinion is not high enough to justify an actual relationship, i.e. the writers are telling us that we have to cope with the same level of subtext as with any other show (at least, one that acknowledges the gay), and also telling us that it means more. Which is something I've only just decided is happening, and which now irritates me.
Also, I am much more interested in the first time two characters kiss than, say, the fourteenth. I like the feeling of potential, and we really got that in 'Captain Jack Harkness'- everything worked, the build-up, the slow realisation, the way the real Jack and the audience could see the other meanings in what our Jack was saying. Sudden revelations of sex-having only really work for me when it genuinely seems impossible that the characters in question aren't doing it- which was not the case with Jack and Ianto. Plus it was strangely difficult to work out the Jack/Ianto dynamic- why they were in the relationship, how serious it was, what each of them thought they were getting out of it. I second the flashback idea.
Or you could just argue that the only relationships RTD is really good at writing are the ones that are completely doomed.
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Also, I am much more interested in the first time two characters kiss than, say, the fourteenth. I like the feeling of potential, and we really got that in 'Captain Jack Harkness'- everything worked, the build-up, the slow realisation, the way the real Jack and the audience could see the other meanings in what our Jack was saying. Sudden revelations of sex-having only really work for me when it genuinely seems impossible that the characters in question aren't doing it- which was not the case with Jack and Ianto. Plus it was strangely difficult to work out the Jack/Ianto dynamic- why they were in the relationship, how serious it was, what each of them thought they were getting out of it. I second the flashback idea.
Or you could just argue that the only relationships RTD is really good at writing are the ones that are completely doomed.