Liar! Our Pay Scheme Is Awful!

[rionaleonhart]

It's odd how all the little clues that you were ill - the feeling-incapable-of-going-out that you put down to laziness last night, the inexplicable but persistent tiredness all day - fall into place when you're actually leaning over the lavatory and un-eating the meal you worked so hard to prepare. It is possibly slightly worrying that I was genuinely mentally comparing it to foreshadowing in a work of fiction while in the act of throwing up. You'd think I'd have other things to think about, wouldn't you? (Er, sorry for the TMI.)

I feel much less dreadful now than I did before my impromptu reverse lunch, but I'm still rather unwell and, y'know, if you felt like writing ficsnippets in the comments, that might be nice? Only if you have the time and the inclination, obviously.

Comments

[rhosyndu.livejournal.com]

Hmm. I'm guessing you won't object to something slightly cracky...
(Fingers crossed that I can pull it off)

--

In the short space of time they had spent in Transylvania, things had become slightly weird. Well, more weird than usual.

On the first day, James had been bitten by a very large dog while out walking. On the second day, Richard had come down with two pin pricks on his throat and what appeared to be an anaemic attack. On the third day, Jeremy had been crushed to death by a boulder on a mountain path. Shortly afterwards, Richard became sicker and died of mysterious blood loss.

James had been slightly upset by all of this, so went out for a drive with the Stig.

Unfortunately, the car had broken down in an old cemetery. Even more unfortunately, the inhabitants of said cemetery were six feet higher than one would usually expect, and were rather interested in relieving them of their brains. Fortunately, it was the full moon and James was rather startled to find himself in possession of huge teeth, claws and rather more shaggy hair than he had that morning. Unfortunately, this didn't manage to stop the Stig from being bitten.

All of which had put a slight crimp on filming.

It got slightly better when a bat flew in through James' open bedroom window and transformed into the world's shortest vampire. With sparkly white fangs.

And a better semblance of normality (for a given value of normal) returned when Jeremy's translucent form materialised and demanded at least eight caravans be used for his funeral pyre.

--

Hope you feel better soon.

[rionaleonhart]

You--


um, what?

YOU'RE INSANE. YOU ARE ABSOLUTELY INSANE. THIS IS BRILLIANT. I love 'James had been slightly upset by all of this'. Yes, your two friends dying bizarrely is one of those things that can really ruin your day.

Seriously, I am gawping at the way you've managed to fit zombies, vampires (sparkly white fangs! Hee!), werewolves and ghosts into such a tiny space.

Did I mention that you are stunningly, gloriously insane?

[rhosyndu.livejournal.com]

Thank you.

Well you know, if you've got one undead creature then you might as well have the others. He'll feel left out if you don't.

I did cheat slightly- it's one of the things I wrote on my long train journey last week: blame the fact I was on my own for six hours at a stretch.

I also did a few little asides and exchanges, like:
"Remember, this is a man who tried to persuade an American to eat black pudding by describing it as 'a fried scab of tastiness'; romance is not on the menu."
"Neither is black pudding anymore."
Which sort of worries me, as I don't know who's talking or what they're on about, but I really want to use it in a fic.

[culf.livejournal.com]

And a better semblance of normality (for a given value of normal) returned when Jeremy's translucent form materialised and demanded at least eight caravans be used for his funeral pyre. = WIN!