rionaleonhart | The Doomed and Crazy Love of James and

(During an adaptation of Macbeth. Macbeth, sometime after his killing of Duncan (ZOMG SPOILER), has been told that 'pigs will fly' before he is harmed (and I didn't see the end, but I wonder how they handled that? 'Where's that pork we were going to cook? Wait a second - what's that going past the window?'), and has got a bit cocky and also even more insane that he was previously, which was pretty damn insane. He has just been yelling at the people working under him. He and Banquo are now alone, sitting on a bench in a cloakroom or something.)
Banquo: ...you're forgetting the most important thing about running a kitchen. (pause) Respect.
(Yes, this version of Macbeth was set in a kitchen. Don't ask me why.)
Macbeth: (very quietly) ...I'm sorry. (reaches out to lay his hand along Banquo's cheek.)
Riona: ...wait, what?
(Banquo looks as if he is having the same thought. Suddenly Macbeth pulls him into this weird half-hug, pressing his (Banquo's) ear against his (Macbeth's) chest, and asks him, half-laughing and half-crazy-sobbing, whether he can hear his heartbeat.)
Riona: ...wait, what?
Banquo: (says something that I can't quite catch. Macbeth releases him and stares into his eyes.)
Macbeth: (all crazy-intense) But you love me.
Banquo: ...yes.
Riona: STOP APPEALING TO MY LOVE OF INCREDIBLY SCREWED-UP ROMANCES MY GOD.
Banquo: (starts talking about his son and the cycle rides they have sometimes.)
Macbeth: (with a rather creepy half-smile that makes you think dear God Banquo don't tell him anything seriously asks quiet questions about where exactly the cycle rides are, whether he feels like having one tomorrow dear God Banquo don't tell him anything.)
Banquo: (tells him.)
Riona: ...well, of course I knew what was going to happen, but I thought that, uh, maybe, in this adaptation... if I thought 'don't tell him' loudly enough... well, he's doomed now anyway.
Macbeth: (catches hold of Banquo's hand as he passes and kisses it, his eyes unfocused.)
Riona: AGHDGIFHDASJF ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL ME?

SO YES. FINE. I NOW CAN'T STOP THINKING ABOUT MACBETH/BANQUO.

DON'T JUDGE ME.

I CAN SEE YOU JUDGING ME. STOP IT.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

People do weird things (http://www.livejournal.com/users/weaselwoman13/691722.html?mode=reply) to Shakespeare.

(Then again, it's Shakespeare. It's practically canonical to slash everyone with everyone else.)

Heh, good point. I can't help but be reminded of a very interesting speech that Iago had in Othello. And the question of Mercutio's sexuality seems to come up whenever he's mentioned. Oddly enough, that was something I never picked up on.

...there are probably better pairings to be suddenly attacked by than Macbeth/Banquo. But the damage has already been done.

I swear that in Twelfth Night, the main character's cousin has a crush on her. So that's, like, incestslash. (...possibly it's As You Like It. Dammit, it's been too long since I read these things.)

Well, in Britain it's perfectly legal to marry one's cousin, so I'm not sure whether it would actually be considered incest.

I have read neither of those plays. I'm an awful student. Apparently my punishment is to be deprived of the femmeslash.

Ohh, my crazy American ignorance! Still, though.

Main character? Totally oblivious. Poor cousin.

Must be As You Like It. I just read Twelfth Night, and it's not that one. That's the one with the crossdressing chick and her brother whose friend is totally gay for him. XDDD

Shakespeare slash WOO!

I want to see that adaptation now...Macbeth is my favourite thing in the history of literature.

I was watching that too, and man, it was hot. In a slightly psychotic, I'm-going-to-have-you-killed way, i.e. the best way ever.

And then the advert for the next one came on, with Rufus Sewell, and I've seen a different adaption of Macbeth with him playing the man himself. It was a little odd. James McAvoy/Rufus Sewell? I could get behind that.

DO I GET TO SEE THIS? Because we're studying Macbeth soon! OMG I WANT TO SEE IT. The class is going to flip; they were already perturbed by Twelfth Night - which, if you want slashy Shakespeare, PWNS. Hell, it owns anyway. And if you don't wanna read it, the 1996 movie is absolute LOVE. You might have seen me raving about this over the past few weeks. XD

...Are you asking me if I wrote that scene? :O

(BTW: your mention of flying porkchops amuses me muchly.)

...Are you asking me if I wrote that scene? :O

YES. YES I AM. I wanted to thank you for it, if you did.

It's only just aired, and it may well be exclusive to the BBC. I don't know whether DVDs will be coming out of their Shakespeare remakes. Whether it is released or not, THIS IS A SCENE YOU HAVE TO SEE.

YES. YES I AM. I wanted to thank you for it, if you did.

I am strangely honored that when you wonder who came up with crazy crackpairings and wtf!scenes, I'm the one you think of. Obviously, I've been doing something right. XD CRACK IS LOVE.

...And if you were just fuckin' with me and are laughing at me now, then THAT WAS VERY MEAN, RIONA. XP

I'm going to find that scene. I'll hunt it down. It can't hide from me. *evil laughter*

OH-HO-HO-HO-HO YESSSS.

By the way, wanna see how they dealt with the pig?

----Would love to do the Assless Freak thing here but can't work out how to---

Macbeth's supplier comes in on the roof in his whizzy helicopter just as Macduff is fighting him with carving knives. "Get it?!" he screams. "Pigs'll fly! Pigs'll fly! A pig is landing on my head!!" Then he pulls apart his chef jacket to expose his chest.

STAB

---END OF SPOILERS---

Ohh, ooooh, I can't wait until FF.net gets a section devoted to tose adaptions...

Thanks for telling me! I basically saw the Macbeth/Banquo scene, stared, thought that the rest of the adaptation couldn't possibly measure up to that and stopped watching. It's nice to know how the pig thing worked out, though. Also that Macbeth, apparently, just kept getting crazier.

I forgot about the Banquo's-ghost scene, though. If they did that, is there anything about it that I should know about?

Also,

magistrate posted a helpful assless freak tutorial in this comment.

Ah, Macbeth/Banquo. The light of many dull English lessons reading that play with Mr Halon. And...scaring him. =D

Remind me to watch the next one plzkthnx

If you have any Macbeth/Banquo-related Mr Halon-scaring anecdotes, I would very much like to hear them.

I can see slash in everything. I saw loads of Macbeth/Banquo in the play, and then I saw - OK, I didn't see, but I invented - plenty of Gerald/Eric/Inspector in An Inspector Calls. Fuuuuun.

Oh, Bethquo. If FF7 fandom has taught me nothing, it's that nothing says lovin' quite like killing someone.

[judge judge judge]

Macbeth/Banquo is OTP))))

The Doomed and Crazy Love of James and - er, of Banquo and Macbeth.

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