Perhaps They Were All Trying 'Alohomora'.

[rionaleonhart]

There should definitely be at least one episode in the second series of Merlin that has Merlin and Arthur interacting in every scene. Because Merlin and Arthur and their interactions are amazing, but frequently they simply do not interact enough. Let us have an episode in which Merlin somehow accidentally locks them in a prison cell together.

...hang on, if Uther locks up sorcerers, why can't they just magic themselves out of prison? We've seen magic being used to unlock doors before. (I suppose the answer could be 'because they're never really sorcerers', but I'm sure he must lock up the occasional actual sorcerer.)

In any case, Merlin cannot magic himself out when he is in prison with Arthur. They will instead be forced to have loud arguments about whose fault it is that they are trapped, followed by Arthur demanding that Merlin allow Arthur to use him as a pillow, followed by long conversations about whether magic is inherently evil, followed, perhaps, by kissing.

I CAN DREAM.

Of course, such an episode would have no plot at all, but I think I would be able to accept that.

Here is a poll that has very little to do with any of this. (Livejournal does not demand that you fill out all the questions on a poll, so you are welcome to answer only the third question if you are not familiar with Final Fantasy X but feel like writing Merlin crossovers/bizarre mpreg/bizarre Merlin mpreg crossovers.)


[Poll #1391796]

(EDIT: SO APPARENTLY I CANNOT SPELL 'SORCERER' shame shame so much shame.)

Comments

[dancesontrains.livejournal.com]

HAVE MY FIRST FIC SEX SCENE \:D/

[rionaleonhart]

I feel this is an excellent start. (Not technically mpreg, but I shall forgive you because you're awesome.)

[timydamonkey.livejournal.com]

...I actually had to use an Al Bhed translator for my ficlet. I feel like I should have learned it or something. :P

Lol at how Auron completely dominates the poll!

[rionaleonhart]

Hmm. Lyh e ica Al Bhed... I was going to say 'from memory', but I can't remember 'f'. Blast! I think 'memory' is 'sasuno', though. OH, WAIT, 'F' IS 'V'.

Lyh e ica Al Bhed vnus sasuno?

The answer: to some extent, but it takes me a really long time.


I suspected Auron would dominate. I started typing out the poll options and then thought 'hang on, this is probably going to be a bit one-sided'. Hence, of course, the 'er, all right, let's pretend Auron isn't there' question.

All the second-favourites so far are female, I notice, which I think is quite nice, because female characters tend to be a bit forgotten in many fandoms.

[dracothelizard.livejournal.com]

If Jeremy Ifrit isn't a GF in Final Fantasy X, just pretend I crossed Merlin over with Final Fantasy VIII instead.

[rionaleonhart]

Ifrit can indeed be summoned in Final Fantasy X! (Something about which I do not imagine Uther would be terribly happy.)

[aestivalis]

I'm really glad you split the poll, because~ I love both Auron and Wakka. Being able to vote for them both made me a happy participant. :D

Poor Tidus currently has no votes! >:

(my icon reveals my actual favourite character in FFX. as if there was any doubt :|b)

[rionaleonhart]

I am also glad I split the poll, because the answers to the first question indicate that a non-split poll would have been really boring. I really don't have enough Final Fantasy icons.

(Jecht! He was pretty great. I am still hoping for Final Fantasy (1/2)X, focusing on Braska's pilgrimage.)

[bubbles-san.livejournal.com]

For the record, I do know Merlin chatacters, but innapropriate mpreg is so much more fun.

I think that would be an amazing episode.

Perhaps Arthur is inspecting the dungeons, as part of his princely duties, and Merlin accidentally locks them in? And while they are locked in, someone attacks someone important with a Mysterious Illness, and they must get out so that they can save the person and stop the other?

[rionaleonhart]

The problem with that: how would Merlin and Arthur know that someone was mysteriously ill? Surely anyone who told them would also say 'er, and I notice you're locked in the dungeons. Let's do something about that'?

(The other problem with that is that news of a Mysterious Illness might distract them somewhat from calling each other idiots and then snogging. Obviously arguments and snogging are much more important than silly things like plot.)

I am all for Merlin accidentally locking them in during a princely dungeon-inspection, though.

[mekosuchinae.livejournal.com]

COMBO BREAKER. I'm sorry. :< I do love Auron, only it is like nothing compared to my love for Possibly Stupid Golden Retriever Puppy (Tidus). I have a character type! It's very embarrassing. LET'S MOVE ON.

[rionaleonhart]

GASP.

(I am mildly perplexed by the fact that your favourite character is Tidus, but take away Auron and your favourite character is Yuna.)

[rionaleonhart]

ALSO I JUST SAW YOUR MINI-FIC AND I LOVE IT.

"Oh, Merlin," said Arthur, almost fondly. "As if you could."

Oh, I love Merlin and Arthur so much.

[vzg.livejournal.com]

I support your love for Tidus!

[the-funmonkey.livejournal.com]

Dean felt a lot better about the whole situation when he landed on the *eating for two* excuse.

Arthur and Merlin need to go on some kind of Quest together, with death-defying heroics and vicious bitching for a full 45 minutes. Arthur could kill things and bring down many curses (this is what he does).

[dracothelizard.livejournal.com]

"Arthur and Merlin need to go on some kind of Quest together, with death-defying heroics and vicious bitching for a full 45 minutes. Arthur could kill things and bring down many curses (this is what he does)"

So, basically, Dean and Sam need to swap places with Arthur and Merlin. I'm sure no one will ever find out :D

[rionaleonhart]

Oh, poor Dean. Hee!

Arthur and Merlin need to go on some kind of Quest together, with death-defying heroics and vicious bitching for a full 45 minutes.

YES. Seriously, Arthur and Merlin, let us have an episode in which some sort of quest is necessary whilst you are both conscious.

[th-esaurus.livejournal.com]

I only picked Wakka because he amuses me in KH. I STILL PRETTY MUCH HATE FFX. Also I will tell you that for assorted reasons, I skim-read a Castiel mpreg fic the other day. It was not a fun experience for me.

[rionaleonhart]

YOU ARE SO WRONG FOR HATING FFX. WRONG WRONG WRONG.

But perhaps not quite as wrong as Castiel mpreg. What? (Tell me about this fic.)

[vzg.livejournal.com]

I spent several minutes looking at question one, and I couldn't deny it: Auron. Big time. AND THEN I LOOKED AT THE SECOND QUESTION AND I LAUGHED AND LAUGHED.

Although I can't help but notice that currently there is one answer for Tidus for the first question and NONE FOR THE SECOND. And yet there are ten answers overall for both? Someone lied!

Tidus would have been my answer for a third, if it had started "Not including Auron and Yuna..."

[mekosuchinae.livejournal.com]

I didn't lie! I love Tidus and Yuna equally! STOP FORCING ME TO MAKE THESE DECISIONS. This pressure is tremendous.

[mekosuchinae.livejournal.com]

ALSO, perhaps Uther shackles suspected sorcerors with iron, because it inhibits magic or something. Still, you'd think if these sorcerors were as evil and dangerous as he claims, they'd be a bit better at getting away.

[rionaleonhart]

Perhaps there's some sort of magic-resistant material, but I don't remember Gwen being bound in any way when she was suspected of sorcery. You really don't think these things through, do you, Uther? (I hope that the second series has a plot sparked off by Uther imprisoning a sorcerer, who then casually opens the door and strolls out.)

[emmarrrrr.livejournal.com]

I LAUGHED MUCH HARDER THAN I OUGHT TO HAVE AT "NOT INCLUDING AURON"

I wrote no fic, because I did not see the box. Because there's no border, and it blended into the backgroud. ALAS.

[rionaleonhart]

ALL IS NOT LOST; you can remedy your lack of boxfic here.

(I suspected you'd pick Rikku! Which... possibly isn't all that brilliant a deduction, given that she used to be your default icon.)

[squeemu.livejournal.com]

I had a tough time choosing between Yuna and Lulu for the second question. EVERYONE IS SO AWESOME IT IS SO DIFFICULT TO CHOOSE

[rionaleonhart]

Your ficlet is the most amazing thing I have ever read. I choose you, Squeemachu.

(EDIT: 'I choose you, Squeemachu' was dreadful and I apologise. But that ficlet is still a work of absolute genius.)

[jira-rd.livejournal.com]

Ahahah, I just thought of an even better ending for my little story.

...

"Horay!" squealed Sam.

[rionaleonhart]

With this apparently being the season of ridiculous fanfic plots, I fear we may well be seeing a pregnant Dean on our hands within an episode or two.

[amy-wolf.livejournal.com]

That's the most inappropriate mpreg I can think of. I hope you're happy.

[rionaleonhart]

I think you win at inappropriate mpreg.

(There is no prize. Writing about an unhelpful dragon impregnating Derren Brown is its own reward.)

[cobecat.livejournal.com]

Sorry for spamming your poll without even knowing you, but I've been playing FFX lately and the Tidus-hate needs to be let out sometimes. ^_^'' To make up for it, here, have a longer ficlet:

Arthur watched in horror as the blond boy in ridiculous suspenders stomped around in a circle making the most petulant whining noises he had ever heard. "You're a knight? You're a knight?" "Guardian, eh? It's different." Wakka laid a friendly hand on the prince's shoulder. "Er...yes, quite." Arthur mustered up a smile and shook the hand gingerly, letting go as quickly as possible.

Two dark-haired women sighed in unison before the princess offered her hand for a handshake. "Morgana." "Lulu." "...I feel as if I know you from somewhere. Are you by any chance a main female character whose role consists of projecting sex appeal while kicking ass?" "Why, I am, in fact. Do you have a contentious, rather condescending relationship with a brother-figure that the producers/game designers are trying to force into being romantic?" "Why, yes." There was a moment of silence before Morgana spoke. "Well, now that that's out of the way, I have to say that I love your hair, but the skirt seems a little unwise." "Tell me about it."

"Merlin, we're leaving!" Arthus extricated himself from Wakka's headlock with a technique that was designed to break at least two bones in the hand and fingers, and stomped a good distance away, flattening his hair down furiously.

"--tried everything I can think of and he's just completely oblivious to it, you know? It really gets me down and I was wondering how you...just a moment, Arthur, we're talking!" Merlin held up an impatient hand and bent his head back down to Yuna's. "Oh, I see. Well, have you tried apologizing profusely even when you've done nothing, or giggling randomly? That's always worked for me. Or what about getting engaged to someone else, that's always a great idea! Doesn't matter who, it's not like they'll be evil or anything." Yuna suggested sweetly.

"I...guess I could try that?" Merlin looked dubious, then sighed as Arthur called again. "Merlin, now!" "I guess we're leaving now...thanks for the advice. And good luck with the whole 'protecting the hero and uniting all the land' thing!" "You too!"

They faded into the sunset as Tidus's voice began to play in the background. He had just gotten to the part where he once again expressed his desire to go back to Zanarkand when there was a crackle of flame and an agonized shriek. All eyes turned to the Great Dragon, who whistled innocently.

The end.

[rionaleonhart]

Hello, stranger! It is nice to meet you! (Ah, I have known the Tidus-hate. Largely, I feel, induced by Videogame Recaps, which I suspect from your poll entry you may know. Rather unexpectedly, however, I found myself really liking him on my last playthrough. He's an idiot, but he can be a loveable idiot. (No, really.))

...oh, my, Morgana and Lulu meeting would be amazing. And is amazing in that little paragraph, in fact. Oh, dear, you have just approximately tripled my desire to write about the adventures of the Merlin characters in Spira.

Also, the idea of Merlin and Yuna talking about being in love together is just too adorable for words. And Arthur trying to regain his dignity after being held in one of Wakka's headlocks is a truly wonderful mental image.

Thank you for this!