Oh, Come On, I Couldn't Resist.
Jun. 13th, 2007 04:50 pmYou've probably heard about this already, because, well, a world-wide zombie apocalypse is a difficult thing to miss. If you've only just woken up and don't know the situation: stay indoors. If you've got any weapons, arm yourself (I never thought I'd wish the UK gun laws were less strict).
You don't have to worry about me: they aren't crowding in on the house yet, and I've heaved a mattress out under the sitting room window; the plan is that, if the zombies break in and it turns out that they can climb stairs (I'm still holding onto the rather desperate hope that they can't, because, well, they shuffle around, don't they? I've never seen a zombie lift its feet enough to actually get up a flight of stairs), I can jump off the balcony, have a soft landing on the mattress, run out onto the common and then... I don't know, hide up a tree (I am almost certain zombies can't climb trees) until all this is over.
Assuming it eventually will be.
But that's not why I'm making this entry. I'm making this entry to say that there may be hope for the people who have already been attacked. From all the reports I've heard, the vast majority of the zombies appear to be completely mindless, but I'm sure that there must be at least some residual intelligence. I believe this because, not long ago, an undead Piers Morgan knocked on the door and asked, very politely, to be let in.
Yes, I know. Of all the bloody fics that could have come true.
I haven't let him in, because I'm not taking any risks and Zombie Piers Morgan has never been exactly trustworthy when he shows up in fanfiction, but we've been speaking for some time through the door and he seems to be perfectly coherent and intelligent, although he doesn't seem able to tell me exactly what happened to him. If he manages to remember, maybe we can use the knowledge to reawaken the minds of the people who have been infected. Don't give up hope.
EDIT: I JUST GENUINELY GOT A PHONE CALL THAT WAS NOTHING BUT WHITE NOISE AUGH AUGH AUGH.
On the plus side, Piers and I have found how to reawaken the zombies' intelligence!
13th of June 2007: Blog Like It's the End of the World. With apologies to the people who are being very serious and dramatic. I couldn't not include Zombie Piers Morgan.
You don't have to worry about me: they aren't crowding in on the house yet, and I've heaved a mattress out under the sitting room window; the plan is that, if the zombies break in and it turns out that they can climb stairs (I'm still holding onto the rather desperate hope that they can't, because, well, they shuffle around, don't they? I've never seen a zombie lift its feet enough to actually get up a flight of stairs), I can jump off the balcony, have a soft landing on the mattress, run out onto the common and then... I don't know, hide up a tree (I am almost certain zombies can't climb trees) until all this is over.
Assuming it eventually will be.
But that's not why I'm making this entry. I'm making this entry to say that there may be hope for the people who have already been attacked. From all the reports I've heard, the vast majority of the zombies appear to be completely mindless, but I'm sure that there must be at least some residual intelligence. I believe this because, not long ago, an undead Piers Morgan knocked on the door and asked, very politely, to be let in.
Yes, I know. Of all the bloody fics that could have come true.
I haven't let him in, because I'm not taking any risks and Zombie Piers Morgan has never been exactly trustworthy when he shows up in fanfiction, but we've been speaking for some time through the door and he seems to be perfectly coherent and intelligent, although he doesn't seem able to tell me exactly what happened to him. If he manages to remember, maybe we can use the knowledge to reawaken the minds of the people who have been infected. Don't give up hope.
EDIT: I JUST GENUINELY GOT A PHONE CALL THAT WAS NOTHING BUT WHITE NOISE AUGH AUGH AUGH.
On the plus side, Piers and I have found how to reawaken the zombies' intelligence!
13th of June 2007: Blog Like It's the End of the World. With apologies to the people who are being very serious and dramatic. I couldn't not include Zombie Piers Morgan.
