rionaleonhart | Also, I Genuinely Believe That Oxford Is Silent Hill.

I seem to remember that there was a 'Five/Ten/An Infinite Number Of Fannish Confessions' meme going around a while ago, and I thought 'hey, that could be fun!'

But then it occurred to me that I, er, don't really have much to confess. At least, not that I can think of. I think I've already mentioned most of my shameful shameful fannish secrets. 'I AM IN LOVE WITH AN RPS THREESOME' or 'I CAN'T STOP WRITING CROSSOVERS HELP' wouldn't exactly be news, would it?

However, I was able to come up with four things:

- I am a colossal feedback addict. I'd forgotten what the feedback high felt like until I wrote and posted a couple of fics very recently. The problem with this is that I'll sometimes be tempted to put up a subpar story just for the feedback (yes, it's awful, I know), and then I'll come to my senses after two hours, take it down and hide from the community for a while in shame.

- I will write absolutely anything if the idea pesters me enough. I can't write smut to save my life, but I can be persuaded to write almost any concept, no matter how ridiculous. It's why I always end up writing ridiculous crossovers and parrotmonkey/elf romance. Some of you have already taken advantage of this by suggesting insane fanfic ideas to me until I snap and write them, damn you.

(I love you all really. Some of the fanfics I'm most pleased with have come out of evil persuasion by you people.)

- I don't like Terry Pratchett. I have tried and tried to like the Discworld books, but I just can't. I'm sorry. I couldn't even get into Good Omens, even though I really like what little I've read of Gaiman.

- I am attracted to the wrong Top Gear presenter.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

(I TRIED TO LIKE HIM I REALLY DID. PERHAPS THERE IS SOMETHING WRONG WITH ME. If you made a post about his awesomeness I probably would read it, because I am interested in knowing what his appeal is.)

I never knew someone could write fic like that before! Maybe I should try it out?

You should! It really is a lot of fun. (I think I probably particularly like silly drabbles and one-sentence fics because I have The Shortest Attention Span In The World, though.)

(I never finished reading Sabriel (it's my shockingly short attention span again). Maybe I should go back to it?)

TOP GEAR IS FANTASTIC. Yes, it is very much all like that. I advise you to watch this, which is a ridiculously fun challenge in which the three presenters try to make their own hydro-cars and it is an absolute disaster. (You can probably tack 'and it is an absolute disaster' onto the end of the description of any Top Gear challenge.)

(Well, his appeal for me is partly the bits of his books that are an enormous piss-take of the conventions of fantasy. Examples: The True King who actually doesn't want to be king, the fact that his werewolves/dwarfs/trolls/zombies/vampires etc. are actually people rather than archtypes, the elves actually being a bunch of evil bastards. He also does fabulous things with names, anti-climax, literary references, and the meanings of words. Also! Death. I just, I love Death. I think he needs a hug.)

The Shortest? You sure about that? I've been known to lose interest in sentences as I say them. Maybe I'll do that onesentence request meme for my fandoms.

(Never? How far d'you get?)

I have started watching the video and the dude just reasoned his way into making an aquatic vehicle with a mast and sails. I AM SURE IT WILL END WELL.

(I do remember that there was a takeoff of Anne McCaffrey's Pern novels somewhere in The Colour of Magic, and Good Omens had a Just William parody. Perhaps I would enjoy his work more if I 'got' more of those references.)

Maybe I'll do that onesentence request meme for my fandoms.

Do! Seriously, it's fantastic fun. (If the people who read your journal are anything like those who read mine, though, you'll probably end up being forced to write all sorts of insane crossovers.)

(I don't actually remember. It was quite a while ago. I just got halfway through and sort of forgot to carry on reading.)

Hee, the sailing-car! The mast causes so many problems on the road.

(It does require a fair bit of, er, general knowledge? I collect strange facts and silly history, and the Discworld has loads of that. The books get way better after the first two, honest. And he wrote Good Omens fifteen years ago, his style's changed a bit since then.)

Not many people actually read my journal, so if I do that, I'm relying on you to give me bad, bad ideas.

(Readitreaditreadit it's not to everyone's taste but I feel so alone in my fandom and my strange obsession with Sabriel's father and Mogget.)

Clarkson's car will not stop being on fire. And - honestly, is he crazy? Those engines are enormous, it'd be like trying to haul an elephant around. And the other two are just procrastinating and Hammond is trying to see how much house he can make out of his car and TOYBOTA. EXCUSE ME, THAT'S GENIUS AND I MUST LAUGH.

(Can you recommend one of his books that you think is particularly good?)

I have to warn you in advance that I may sort of, er, request Top Gear fic.

(I am very busy at the moment, but when I've sorted my life out I will!)

And - honestly, is he crazy?

Yes. As you will quickly learn.

(Small Gods ftw. Reaper Man contains one of my favourite passages ever written and is when Death starts becoming less RRRRGH and more HMMM? Um...The Watch books, that is Guards, Guards!, Men At Arms, Jingo and The Fifth Elephant are pretty universally popular. They also need to be read more or less in order. I love Going Postal because it's about words and the power of words, which, yeah, kind of my kink, nearly. The Last Hero has spectacular illustrations. But it's hard to tell what'll appeal to different people. I haven't read them all yet, either.)

Ooh, er. I don't know much about it yet. I'm not sure what would happen if you did. Possibly there would be me bs-ing my way around car knowledge and confusing my dad (who is a car nut) with all sorts of weird questions.

(Horray!)

I'm....I'm getting that impression. Everyone is stalling and he just doesn't care because it means he wins by default. Wow. Hammond is also such a dweeby little guy, so happy about his magazines. And his, er. What was that last one there?

(Thank you! I'll see if I can get my hands on Small Gods or Going Postal at some point in the future.)

I probably wouldn't request anything requiring huge amounts of car knowledge, mainly because I, er, know practically nothing about them myself. It'll probably all be 'CLARKSON MOCKS HAMMOND FOR EVER' and 'THE TOP GEAR TEAM IN SPACE'.

And his, er. What was that last one there?

I can't tell whether this question is rhetorical, so you'll have to forgive me if I answer it: it was, rather fantastically, the Gay Times. I love the scene later on in which James is reading it and drinking tea.

First of all, Gay Times? AHHAHAHHAAAHAA that's great in an awful way. (Mm, tea. Okay, what. Brain sometimes I don't even know if you are actually a brain and not some sort of tea strainer that has mutated out of control).

Second of all, I blame you for this completely.

Also, I Genuinely Believe That Oxford Is Silent Hill.

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject