Riona (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
rionaleonhart) wrote2018-01-04 10:39 am
rionaleonhart) wrote2018-01-04 10:39 am
The Sound Of Your Voice Puts The Pain In Reverse.
I went to Wales with friends to see in the new year!
In the ladies' loos at a service station, I thought at first that there was a mirror when in fact no mirror was present; the place just had a near-symmetrical design. I started to suspect the truth when I noticed the 'mirror' had no smudges or imperfections, and eventually I stuck my hand through it to confirm it didn't exist. It occurred to me only then that perhaps I should have wondered why I had no reflection.
We drove through Haverfordwest, where all the bollards and tree trunks were encased in cute knitting. Less unsettling, as a village quirk, than the place I passed through years ago with my family, where there were no people to be seen but every house had a homemade scarecrow in the front garden. It still haunts me.
Rei slept for much of the journey. The other inhabitants of the car collaborated on a limerick:
There once was a person named Rei
Who slept for a week and a day.
She got kind of grumpy
When the car ride got bumpy
But she was still sleeping; hooray!
'It's good,' Yuffie said, on hearing our effort later. 'Not lewd enough.'
I corrected this.
There once was a person named Rei
Who slept for a week and a day.
She got kind of grumpy
When the car ride got bumpy
But she was still sleeping; hooray!
And then we fucked her.
(We then spent most of our first meal in the place having an extended discussion of orgies. Good work, gang.)
We spent our first evening there passing around an Animorphs book (Elfangor's Secret) and reading it aloud, a chapter per person, until past midnight, because we are cool grown-ups who know how to party. A particular highlight was Rei's alarming rendition of the lines, 'I looked around at all my friends. I tried to make eye contact with each as I repeated, "Fast and hard."'
('You're ruining the childhood that these books already ruined,' I protested.)
St David's Cathedral is an extraordinarily beautiful building, both inside and out. But then there's the tacky little gift shop in one corner, selling 'Holy Socks: Faith on Your Feet'.
It was a full day later when I suddenly exclaimed, 'Oh, my God, "Holy Socks" is a FUCKING PUN.'
The 'miracle' that canonised St David: he was seen with a white dove on his shoulder. The cathedral had a statue of St David and the dove. The dove had a halo. The saint himself did not.
At one point, wearing two pairs of trousers in the lounge of the building we'd booked, I found myself becoming uncomfortably warm, so I stood and said, 'I'm going to take my trousers off. Try not to be too scandalised.'
When I'd stripped off my tracksuit bottoms, revealing the jeans beneath, I realised one member of our party was desperately covering his eyes. I tried to tell him it was okay to look, but I was laughing too hard to get the words out.
We somehow got into a discussion of intercepting takeout delivery drones, and how such interception could be prevented.
Chris: Theft detected! Adding poison to food.
Riona: I don't think you'd be allowed to poison it. How can you legally protect your food?
Rei: Theft detected! Robot licking food.
Hannah: Licking 50% complete.
We were playing a great little board game called Codenames on New Year's Eve; Yuffie's boyfriend Chris was giving us clues, and we had to work out which words on the board corresponded to the clue (for example, at one point he wanted his team to choose the words 'tail' and 'worm', so he gave the clue 'Peter Pettigrew').
We suspended the game just before midnight, so we could see in the new year properly. We saw it in extremely well; Chris proposed to Yuffie at midnight, and she accepted. Yuffie is one of my oldest and dearest friends - I've known her for about eighteen years now - and I'm really glad I could be there for that moment.
There was applause, congratulations, champagne, Auld Lang Syne, the discovery that the words of the Pokémon theme fit remarkably well to the tune of Auld Lang Syne, a lot of 'did all you guys know about this? how did you manage to keep it a secret???' from Yuffie. (We knew.)
'Chris,' I said, eventually, 'this is all very exciting, but what's our fucking clue?'
But we never finished that suspended game of Codenames. Tragic. He probably proposed just so he wouldn't have to think of another clue.
We all went down with norovirus on New Year's Day (I'm still recovering), but it was still really good to have a holiday.
In the ladies' loos at a service station, I thought at first that there was a mirror when in fact no mirror was present; the place just had a near-symmetrical design. I started to suspect the truth when I noticed the 'mirror' had no smudges or imperfections, and eventually I stuck my hand through it to confirm it didn't exist. It occurred to me only then that perhaps I should have wondered why I had no reflection.
We drove through Haverfordwest, where all the bollards and tree trunks were encased in cute knitting. Less unsettling, as a village quirk, than the place I passed through years ago with my family, where there were no people to be seen but every house had a homemade scarecrow in the front garden. It still haunts me.
Rei slept for much of the journey. The other inhabitants of the car collaborated on a limerick:
There once was a person named Rei
Who slept for a week and a day.
She got kind of grumpy
When the car ride got bumpy
But she was still sleeping; hooray!
'It's good,' Yuffie said, on hearing our effort later. 'Not lewd enough.'
I corrected this.
There once was a person named Rei
Who slept for a week and a day.
She got kind of grumpy
When the car ride got bumpy
But she was still sleeping; hooray!
And then we fucked her.
(We then spent most of our first meal in the place having an extended discussion of orgies. Good work, gang.)
We spent our first evening there passing around an Animorphs book (Elfangor's Secret) and reading it aloud, a chapter per person, until past midnight, because we are cool grown-ups who know how to party. A particular highlight was Rei's alarming rendition of the lines, 'I looked around at all my friends. I tried to make eye contact with each as I repeated, "Fast and hard."'
('You're ruining the childhood that these books already ruined,' I protested.)
St David's Cathedral is an extraordinarily beautiful building, both inside and out. But then there's the tacky little gift shop in one corner, selling 'Holy Socks: Faith on Your Feet'.
It was a full day later when I suddenly exclaimed, 'Oh, my God, "Holy Socks" is a FUCKING PUN.'
The 'miracle' that canonised St David: he was seen with a white dove on his shoulder. The cathedral had a statue of St David and the dove. The dove had a halo. The saint himself did not.
At one point, wearing two pairs of trousers in the lounge of the building we'd booked, I found myself becoming uncomfortably warm, so I stood and said, 'I'm going to take my trousers off. Try not to be too scandalised.'
When I'd stripped off my tracksuit bottoms, revealing the jeans beneath, I realised one member of our party was desperately covering his eyes. I tried to tell him it was okay to look, but I was laughing too hard to get the words out.
We somehow got into a discussion of intercepting takeout delivery drones, and how such interception could be prevented.
Chris: Theft detected! Adding poison to food.
Riona: I don't think you'd be allowed to poison it. How can you legally protect your food?
Rei: Theft detected! Robot licking food.
Hannah: Licking 50% complete.
We were playing a great little board game called Codenames on New Year's Eve; Yuffie's boyfriend Chris was giving us clues, and we had to work out which words on the board corresponded to the clue (for example, at one point he wanted his team to choose the words 'tail' and 'worm', so he gave the clue 'Peter Pettigrew').
We suspended the game just before midnight, so we could see in the new year properly. We saw it in extremely well; Chris proposed to Yuffie at midnight, and she accepted. Yuffie is one of my oldest and dearest friends - I've known her for about eighteen years now - and I'm really glad I could be there for that moment.
There was applause, congratulations, champagne, Auld Lang Syne, the discovery that the words of the Pokémon theme fit remarkably well to the tune of Auld Lang Syne, a lot of 'did all you guys know about this? how did you manage to keep it a secret???' from Yuffie. (We knew.)
'Chris,' I said, eventually, 'this is all very exciting, but what's our fucking clue?'
But we never finished that suspended game of Codenames. Tragic. He probably proposed just so he wouldn't have to think of another clue.
We all went down with norovirus on New Year's Day (I'm still recovering), but it was still really good to have a holiday.
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Yeah, I'd assume you show up in mirrors normally. Although I don't think I've seen you in front of a mirror, so I can't be sure.
ILess unsettling, as a village quirk, than the place I passed through years ago with my family, where there were no people to be seen but every house had a homemade scarecrow in the front garden. It still haunts me.
Yeah, that sounds it'd be near the beginning of a horror movie.
I love the limerick!
Theft detected! Robot licking food.
...okay, poison is obviously worse, but a robot drone that can also lick things is definitely creepier.
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Also, when you said 'holy socks' was a pun, it took me a good two minutes to figure out how the pun worked, so you're not alone. :)
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Ginger was very amused that the pun-getting had taken me so long and told Rei about it. Rei's response was '...OH MY GOD.' So it seems there's a fair few of us!
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I knew you were a vampire! I KNEW IT.
You're ruining the childhood that these books already ruined,
I have a new life goal
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