rionaleonhart | We Have To Go Back.

Entry tags:

lost,
when they cry

We Have To Go Back.

I said in my last entry that the start of Lost 'wasn't a bad opening at all' and then found myself thinking that, while the phrasing made sense for the context, it is really understating it. The first ten minutes or so of Lost may be the strongest televisual opening I've ever seen.

Anyway, I rewatched the pilot. Whoops.

And obviously, if you're going to rewatch the pilot, you might as well rewatch the episode after it, because 'Tabula Rasa' is great, and...

Well, here I am, six episodes into Lost. Again.

I don't think I'm going to rewatch the entire thing right away. Maybe the first season, though? I didn't really pin down my feelings about Jack until early in the second season; it might be good to experience the first season again now that I've identified him as the unfortunate love of my life.

It's weird to go straight back to the start from the end; everybody's noticeably younger! I never really registered them ageing, beyond a bit of grey starting to appear at Jack's temples, but skipping back six years really makes it stand out.

Great to rewatch 'Tabula Rasa' now that I've fallen in love with Jack. I love him snarling 'I am not a murderer' at Kate but being cornered into killing someone by the end of the episode. Jack! The compulsive hero who's desperate to save everyone! Forced to kill a person with his own hands!

The show never really fully lays out their story, but I'm still sort of fascinated by the asshole marshal who's devoted himself to destroying Kate's life but is also heavily implied to be in love with her.

I remember thinking 'Tabula Rasa' was a strong episode even before I got attached to the characters; it's even better now. I love characters being attracted to each other but unable to trust each other; I love Sawyer's horror at fucking the kill up; I love that Jack has to finish what Sawyer started and then has to deal with that; I love whatever weird thing Kate and the marshal have going on. Definitely one of my favourite episodes of Lost; maybe my absolute favourite?

I found myself thinking about the ending of Lost during a walk and getting weirdly emotional about it. As with Higurashi and Umineko, something about Lost resonates so strongly with me it's almost painful. Love in the face of everything. Connections, how intense and life-shaping they can be, how they're important even if they can't last, how they can retain that importance even when they're no longer tangibly there. How things could have happened differently, and what that means. People finding each other, perhaps when they're ~lost~ (I had a WHOLE BUNCH OF FEELINGS when it first occurred to me that the title of Lost might not just refer to being stranded on the island). I don't think I can be very articulate about it.

I'm so sorry I'm still flooding your reading page with this show.

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There's nothing better than being able to marathon style something you love. I always prefer to blitz through a series if I'm in love with it!

I'm not surprised you're still in love with Lost, but I am a little bit surprised that you've not mentioned Taskmaster!

I don't think I'm going to rewatch the entire thing right away. Maybe the first season, though?

I am going to watch for the "this entry is retrospectively hilarious" tag on this entry, just so you know. :P

It's weird to go straight back to the start from the end; everybody's noticeably younger! I never really registered them ageing, beyond a bit of grey starting to appear at Jack's temples, but skipping back six years really makes it stand out.

It is really weird when you're watching something long-running and you're suddenly confronted by aging even though it'd be more baffling if it, you know, didn't happen.

The show never really fully lays out their story, but I'm still sort of fascinated by the asshole marshal who's devoted himself to destroying Kate's life but is also heavily implied to be in love with her.

This reminds me a little of the manga and anime adaption of Monster (which I think is actually on Netflix now, after years of being basically unobtainable?). There's a character called Eva who I've always loved because if any other story she'd just be *tragic backstory* but in Monster she gets her own story of being on top of the world and in love, to losing everything (partially due to her own choices and partially due to horrible events that happen), to completely self-destructing, blaming it all on her former boyfriend and living purely on spite (and alcohol) for a while while still clearly being in love, making awful choices and only making good ones when it's too late, to a creeping realisation and very gradual change (though I'm still not sure she could be called a good person by the end). A lot of people hate Eva but she's such a mess, it's great - and understandable, if in an unhinged kind of way. I was always very happy whenever we got a sudden Eva chapter or arc. You might like Monster actually, though I'm not sure how well it'd come going after something like Lost.

I spend a lot of time living in my head just thinking and my family thinks I'm brooding when I'm just like... having fannish thoughts, please don't interrupt me, haha. I kind of love that you do this too.

-timydamonkey

I am a little bit surprised that you've not mentioned Taskmaster!

I'm really enjoying this season of Taskmaster! It's something I watch with my housemates, though, so I can't pause it to take notes; it's a lot easier to share every passing thought I have about Lost, which I watch alone.

It's a strong panel, I think. Jenny's probably my favourite; she's hilariously chaotic. Mae's a strong all-rounder, very focused and determined. Kiell's outrage and little songs are great. Ivo's an entertaining disaster. I wasn't sure what to expect from Frankie Boyle, but Taskmaster often shows another side of its contestants, and that definitely feels like the case here; he's come across as a lot more centred and likeable than I expected. I was startled by how genuinely bad I felt for him in the most recent episode!

I am going to watch for the "this entry is retrospectively hilarious" tag on this entry, just so you know. :P

I very nearly mentioned that tag at that point in the post; it really felt like I was tempting fate. We'll see!

It is really weird when you're watching something long-running and you're suddenly confronted by aging even though it'd be more baffling if it, you know, didn't happen.

True! I wonder whether the three-year timeskip halfway through was in part done because the showrunners went 'we cannot keep progressing time at a rate of approximately one month per season, it's going to become really obvious that that is not the rate at which the characters are ageing'.

Eva sounds like a really interesting character! I just looked Monster up on Wikipedia, and I'm very amused by the quick summary on the first volume's cover ending with 'That's how this horrible story begins!'

I spend a lot of time living in my head just thinking and my family thinks I'm brooding when I'm just like... having fannish thoughts

This is both delightful and highly relatable. Sometimes you have to spend time in other worlds!

I have been watching this season's Taskmaster. I've seen some before but it's tended to be more of an on in the background than an active watch? I'm actively watching this season though. I like the panel. Jenny's enthusiasm is infectious and she's very funny, Frankie is surprisingly calm and soft-spoken (I love his and Ivo's team tasks - that spoon task was my favourite of the series so far), Ivo panics, Kiell is funny and Mae likes to look for loopholes.

Are there any kids in Lost? That's normally where it becomes a really hard sell. Take Netflix's adaption of A Series of Unfortunate Events, for example: you can always tell instantly what season you're on based on Sunny (the baby, if you're unfamiliar with the books). It kind of works for that show as Sunny does grow up somewhat in the books but not as drastically as seen on screen.

Exhibit A: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9TniV1CI9lE (the opening sequence for all episodes; spot the season based on baby age :P).

I've just looked up that wikipedia article for Monster and my favourite bit is that on the cover it says HORRIBLE STORY under the title. Has nobody heard of marketing?? That plot summary barely touches on the story, too - it's a very character driven story and doesn't ever give easy answers to the questions it presents.

I realised that in my Eva summary I didn't put the main bit of why it reminded me of your line. Here is a quote from one of the translations, from Eva (think this might be from the official dub): "This man was my only hope. I must see to it that his life is ruined, or I can never be happy again." Eva's a fascinating mess.

-timydamonkey

People being fannish about things makes me happy, so as far as I'm concerned you never have to apologize for that!

Aww, I'm glad to hear that! I always like seeing other people's enthusiasm as well.

I never got madly into Lost, but I do remember thinking the beginning was a hell of a premise. Did they ever explain about the polar bear??

I'm really just commenting to recommend you watch From when you're in the mood for a new show (currently in its second season), because it kind of reminded me of Lost, not least because Harold Perrineau is basically the lead guy in it. People get stuck in a town where monsters come out at night, but no one knows why or how or if they can ever get out. It's really all about the friends they make along the way. I'm really enjoying it.

I... think there was some sort of animal testing happening on the island and the bears got loose? I think that's what was going on.

Huh, that does sound potentially like my sort of thing. Thank you for the recommendation!

riona PLEASE I am still watching season two how do you do it

This show has devoured me whole and I need help.

(Also, how is the rewatch experience going? WAIT NO I just remembered you haven't seen past season one before, so I suppose it's just the watch experience. IT'S OKAY, I'M GOING TO STOP EDITING THIS COMMENT NOW, I'M DONE.)

Edited 2023-05-01 19:00 (UTC)

Tempted to just write this comment one word at a time, adding each additional word as an edit.

But the (re)watch is going well! I'm pretty certain I'm now well beyond the point of knowing anything that happens although the very beginning of season two surprised me by being familiar, and when the numbers in the hatch ticked over and started turning into weird hieroglyphics that felt oddly familiar as well. Most recent episode I watched, Sun realised she is pargnant w/ babey, and Henry said some extremely suspicious stuff about maybe sending Sayid, Ana Lucia and I suppose Charlie into a trap? But he may have just been saying crazy stuff for funsies, because people in Lost love doing stuff like that and then being surprised when people are upset with them. You are all lunatics.

Michael has been gone for half the season and Walt has been nothing but cameos and I miss them immensely. I'm not spoiled about what happens with either of them, but I am spoiled about the fact that Child Actor Ages Too Fast For Show's Internal Chronology, so I don't think this situation improves and I am disheartened. Miss my awkwardly bonding father-and-son combo. Also now that I am thinking about it, where is Vincent. my god. the whole family is dead.

Sun realised she is pargnant w/ babey

I enjoyed this immensely.

'But he may have just been saying crazy stuff for funsies, because people in Lost love doing stuff like that and then being surprised when people are upset with them. You are all lunatics' is also great. Why is everyone on this island so weird? I'm looking at you, Locke. I mean, I'm looking at everyone, but I'm especially looking at you.

I'm sorry that the show is so cruelly dangling half of your favourite characters just out of your reach!

I feel as if...

You are Lost to me.

I'm sorry. I didn't mean to abandon you; I've just been claimed by the island. (If it helps, you can imagine that the island is Edwards Island and I have been claimed by the ghosts.)

Does that mean you'll write as many entries about Oxenfree 2: Here We Ox Again as you have about the plane crash show starring Michael Emerson?

Edited 2023-05-01 22:18 (UTC)

And obviously, if you're going to rewatch the pilot, you might as well rewatch the episode after it, because 'Tabula Rasa' is great, and...

Well, here I am, six episodes into Lost. Again.

I've done that for shows before! Shorter ones, but I know the "I need to see it again" feeling.

It really took me by surprise! It's fairly common for me to rewatch or replay things after a while, but I think this is the first time I've felt compelled to dive back in straight away.

I know nothing about Lost (or Higurashi or Umineko, from this genre), but I've been enjoying your updates about it and your enthusiasm about Jack! ;D And aww at your description of love + connections in the show -- that sounds lovely.

I hope you enjoy your maybe rewatch (and I laughed at now that I've identified him as the unfortunate love of my life. ;D).

Aww, this made me smile! I'm glad you've enjoyed my alarmed yelling as I trip and fall headlong into this show.

I haven't watched Lost, but I have been enjoying your posts. So, I ended up watching these long videos about the show: LOST Was Weird: A Show No One Wanted to Make (3 hours) and When LOST Became "TV'S GREATEST MESS" (6 hours) when I otherwise wouldn't have bothered clicking on these vids. (If there was any Jack bashing it flew over my head. When it comes to Jack the videomaker talks about Jack's need to have control and how his bad communication skills makes him hard to read; I think the videomaker shows an understanding of the character and how he gets plots rolling + has a genuine love for the whole show.) I enjoyed these videos and the show seems really interesting! But I don't know if I could ever actually watch through it because I'm just plain bad at watching TV shows 😅 I like having secondhand knowledge about it though, so your posts have a reader in me 😊

I'm glad to hear you've been enjoying my posts, and that you were intrigued enough to check out the videos! (Wow, you said 'long' and you weren't kidding.)

I can't really bring myself to watch any deep analysis of Lost's production, because I loved it too much; I don't want to spend too long looking behind the curtain in case it takes some of the magic away! But I'm glad to hear the videomaker has a love for the show, and that you had a good time watching. It's definitely an interesting show and I do think it's something special, even if in many ways it's a bit of a mess!

I took a quick look, and I'm cracking up at the fact that one of the segments in the second video is called 'Lost fans hate Lost'. That very much does seem to be the case, much as Doctor Who fans hate Doctor Who and Final Fantasy fans hate Final Fantasy.

Re-watching something with new information (not even the plot stuff, but the 'I love this character now and I didn't back then' stuff) can be so much fun, and I love that you just did it immediately! :D And everyone suddenly being all baby-faced is something I enjoy about long shows too.

And I can't articulate what Lost means to me pretty much at all, never really could outside of some very specific situations, so imo you're doing great articulating it! ♡

I don't think I've ever finished a show and gone straight back to the start before! There really is something special about Lost, whether it's possible to articulate or not.

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We Have To Go Back.

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