Sprechen Sie Talk, Huh?

[rionaleonhart]

I don't have a fic on the go at the moment, but I'm in the mood to do something creative, so I thought I'd dig up one of my favourite memes!

Ask any fictional character you think I might be able to manage a question, and I'll reply in-character as them with an answer (or possibly reply as myself going 'WHAT THE HELL, I CAN'T DO THIS'). Feel free to ask either as yourself or as another character.

If you're not sure what fandoms I'm in, the fandom list on my AO3 might help.

You may, if you wish, ask multiple questions (and/or multiple characters) or attempt to engage the characters in extended conversation. Ask away!

Comments

[wolfy_writing]

Robert, for every other member of the drama society, what is one thing you admire about them?

Robert

[rionaleonhart]

All of them? Let's see.

Well, Sandra's easy enough: she's a talented actress who understands that more is more, and that 'less is more' is a lie put about by those who resent that they have not been blessed with acting skills.

Vanessa can act when things are going well, meaning that she is perfectly solid for the first four seconds or so of a production. Jonathan is similar: a perfectly capable actor under specific conditions that are, unfortunately, rarely met.

Chris... can occasionally act, I suppose. The less said about his directing, the better.

Annie is admirably enthusiastic and, in her occasional role as Chris's assistant, is open to ideas that Chris himself might unreasonably shoot down.

Max showed admirable judgement in signing up for my evening acting course.

Trevor should, I suppose, be applauded for his dedication as a stage manager. It can't be easy to motivate oneself in a role that is ultimately uncreative and meaningless.

Dennis... hmm. Dennis...

Well. Dennis offered me space in his home when I was living in my car. It was...

It was motivated in part by self-interest, of course, because he now benefits from my company and wisdom. That said, I... I suppose it was a kind thing to do. I appreciated it.

[larissa]

Light, what would you do if your father found out you were Kira?

Light

[rionaleonhart]

Interesting thought exercise. My father is a strongly principled man and would be horrified to learn any member of his family was Kira, as would I. Not that it's relevant, because I'm not Kira.

Kira's behaviour suggests someone who is dedicated to his cause and prepared to do whatever needs to be done. If a family member stood in his way, I doubt he'd hesitate to—

...

Did L tell you to ask me this question?

[wolfy_writing]

Chris Bean, if you were going to pick a play where every member of the Cornley Drama Society had a role that was perfect for them, what would it be like?

Dennis, same question.

Chris and Dennis

[rionaleonhart]

Dennis: Robert likes to have an important role. So I suppose he should be a king or something?

Chris: Robert likes causing trouble. Put him in a mid-sized role: not so small he'll be driven to sabotage the production, but not so large he can take over the entire play.


Dennis: Jonathan finds it hard to get onto the set sometimes. So maybe he should do, um. You know, when there's a puppet or something on the stage, and you hear the actor's voice. I used to think it was the puppet talking, but it's a person acting, apparently.

Chris: A voiceover role? That's... that's not a bad idea, actually. I usually just cast him in minor parts to minimise the risk, which is a shame, because he's one of the better actors in the company.


Chris: Vanessa requires predictability, which unfortunately can be hard to come by on the stage. Small role, minimal interaction with props.

Dennis: I think Vanessa would probably like a role where she doesn't have to talk to me.

Chris: (a little sympathetic) Oh, Dennis. (pause) Although I suppose that is true.


Dennis: Sandra and Max both like looking at the audience. So maybe they should be narrators?

Chris: Sandra is good in femme fatale roles. Max... some sort of comic relief character, I suppose. He does like to make the audience laugh; it'd be nice if he could do it only when appropriate.


Dennis: I think I'd cast Annie as the main character.

Chris: The lead? Really?

Dennis: If it's a man, I mean. Annie likes playing men.

Chris: If you think she's lead material, surely she'd be capable of playing a female lead as well.

Dennis: Sandra wouldn't like it.

Chris: Sandra wouldn't like it, no.

(pause)

Chris: I suppose Annie would be fine in a lead role, although, thinking about it, I'm not sure I've ever cast her as the lead myself. She's a reliable all-rounder, so I tend to give her whatever's left over once I've cast the more... specialised members of the company.

Dennis: I know. She's always complaining about it.

Chris: Is... is she?


Chris: Dennis shouldn't have any lines, ideally.

Dennis: I'd like maybe one line, but I'd need a lot of time to get it right.


Dennis: I think Chris is good at villains.

Chris: I do like playing villains, actually.

Dennis: Because he's scary sometimes.

Chris: Because I - because I'm capable of nuance.


Dennis: Trevor likes being backstage on his phone. Maybe we should do a play about an actor who's always backstage on his phone, and everyone else has to try to get him onto the stage. Oh, but then maybe the phone man would be the main character, so Annie would be playing him.

Chris: You know Trevor's not an actor, don't you?

Dennis: Really? What's he doing here, then?

Chris: I do sometimes ask myself the same question.

Trevor: (calling from outside the room) Oi, you know we can all hear you from out here, right?

Re: Chris and Dennis

[newbie1990]

This is delightful! Chris' sympathy for Dennis tempered with the fact that it is true, Annie complaining to Dennis & both of them recognising her talent, Dennis thinking Trevor is an actor. Charmed.

[wolfy_writing]

Vanessa, quick, improvise an impression of each of your fellow drama society members right now, go!