I Shouldn't Be Allowed To Watch TV.

[rionaleonhart]

Pairings I Would Really, Really Like Somebody To Write:

Lee/Keith (Any Dream Will Do; not including their full names in case either is in the habit of Googling himself. Er, hello, Lee or Keith, if you've somehow stumbled across this! I hope you don't know what 'slash' is. PLEASE DO NOT LOOK IT UP). This is extremely bad and wrong of me, but I can't help it. Any Dream Will Do was a very recent TV series in which young men competed for the lead role in a West End production of Joseph and his Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat. During the final, a number of scenes awakened my poor demented brain to the idea of Lee/Keith, no matter how hard I tried to prevent it:

The announcement of the contender in third place. Lee (my favourite) is the one in the red coat; Keith is the one in yellow.
Lee and Keith perform 'Superstar' from Jesus Christ Superstar.
The announcement of the winner.

OBSERVE THE HUGGING. IT IS ADORABLE oh dear I'm a terrible person.

Also, have Lee and Lewis singing 'Oh What a Circus' from Evita. It has nothing to do with slash (unless you're one of the people who seem to be intrigued by Lee/Lewis - ahahaha, I love that I'm not the only person who has actually been contemplating Any Dream Will Do slash, you lunatics), but it's probably my favourite of the performances.

Jeremy Clarkson/Ford GT (Top Gear). I can't believe there isn't more of this, honestly. It is an amazing, beautiful, tragic love story. Man meets car, man falls in love with car, man orders car, car is eventually delivered a million years late, man licks roof of car in carsexual bliss, car refuses to start the next day, car spends the next year making besotted man miserable. It is a fabulous pairing for angst. YES, I KNOW THAT IT IS BETWEEN A MAN AND A CAR. WHAT IS YOUR POINT? (I would not say no to Jeremy Clarkson/Bugatti Veyron, either.)

Richard Hammond/Selphie Tilmitt (Top Gear/Final Fantasy VIII). This would be adorable, right up to the point at which they blow up the entire planet.

Allison Cameron/The Janitor (House/Scrubs). I think that I have a strange sort of fondness for pairings that manage to combine adorability with absolute lunacy. This would, of course, have to be Cameron as she is portrayed in Series One and Two, because in Series Three she has a sudden and bizarre personality change. Woe!

Top Gear Dog/dracothelizard (Top Gear/um, the Netherlands). You know it's true.

And, as always, Captain Jack Harkness/anyone. If you know the character, you'll understand.

Comments

[culf.livejournal.com]

The Janitor is way too awesome for Allison "Mary Sue" Cameron! there should be a Culf/Janitor ship, right next to the Culf/Robert Sean Leonard in Dead Poets Society ship

[rionaleonhart]

Oh, come now, even if you don't like Cameron you can't call her a Mary Sue! She's too easily hurt; she has a need to be liked that impedes her ability to do her job properly, leads her to do stupid things and can make her a bit of a pushover; she is incapable of objectivity; she has terrible, terrible taste in men and deludes herself into thinking that she is capable of fixing everything. She's hardly an idealised writer-avatar. (Sorry, Cameron; I, er, point out your flaws because I love.)

Ahem. Sorry about that. (If the Janitor is too awesome for her - and I can understand why people don't like her - then people should write more Janitor/Elliot! IT IS QUITE POSSIBLY THE CUTEST PAIRING EVER.)

[culf.livejournal.com]

Okay, maybe I was a little harsh on her because I don't like her. Cuddy is much cooler than Cameron could ever dream of. And she does not have a terrible taste in men. She likes House, and House is great! (if you've seen season 3, I haven't, so please don't spoil anything for me!)
And yes, Janitor/Elliot is the cutest pairing ever! It breaks my heart just a little every time it looks like it's going to happen, then Elliot ditzes off somewhere else.

[wanttobeatree.livejournal.com]

I have no idea why, but my brain has decided Cameron/Janitor would be totally awesome.

*FEAR*

[rionaleonhart]

Hooray! It really could be adorable, I think. And she would be very perplexed by JD's fear of the Janitor, and would probably conclude that he was having paranoid delusions.

[wanttobeatree.livejournal.com]

I have this vision of the Janitor being a phantom of the... hospital kind of character, stalking her with slightly battered roses and the faint scent of cleaning products. Climaxing in a dramatic rooftop meeting where he offers to show her his collection of stuffed squirrels.

[clo.livejournal.com]

YES! I LOVE YOUTUBE. :D

And you know, after they've broken the hug after Lee's announced the winner, Keith tips forward and Lee catches him by the arms as if to say "No, kissing here would be bad." Which I didn't notice the first time around.

Interesting. *contemplates*

[rionaleonhart]

Keith tips forward and Lee catches him by the arms as if to say "No, kissing here would be bad."

He so does! I didn't realise that, either. Oh, I need fanfiction for this.

[dracothelizard.livejournal.com]

"Top Gear Dog/dracothelizard (Top Gear/um, the Netherlands)"

*flails*

IT IS AN UTTERLY PLATONIC KIND OF LOVE I HOPE YOU KNOW THAT.

[rionaleonhart]

OH MY GOD DRACO

I AM WATCHING THE 'DOGS' EPISODE OF QI AND STEPHEN ASKS ABOUT DOGSHAGGING AND JEREMY SAYS 'You grab the collar and the tail... well, that's what I do' AND HOW DID I NOT NOTICE THAT HE WAS SAYING 'I SHAG DOGS'? OBVIOUSLY THE FIC IS TRUE.

[darthfi.livejournal.com]

SAYS THE WOMAN WHO VERY CAREFULLY INFORMED ME THAT BESTIALITY WAS LEGAL IN THE NETHERLANDS!

[littlemoose.livejournal.com]

Top Gear Dog/dracothelizard (Top Gear/um, the Netherlands). You know it's true.

Hee! It is sweet and platonic and utterly adorable! And unfortunately placed above the last line because I read it as TGD/Jack Harkness... ow my brain.

[dracothelizard.livejournal.com]

"TGD/Jack Harkness"

NO NO NO NO.

Unless it's Human!TG/Jack Harkness.

[cryforthemoon.livejournal.com]

*giggles* I half-wish that I'd watched it now!

Surely there's been car!fic? (Stop making me think about Jeremy licking his car, plzkthnxbai.)

[rionaleonhart]

There certainly has been carfic, but there has not been nearly enough. You can never have enough carshagging. Obviously.

[sideshow-meg.livejournal.com]

There needs to be Lee/Keith, because it's an insanely good pairing.

I also want TGD/Draco because...well, because I'm a freak.

[rionaleonhart]

Hooray for other Lee/Keith fans! Seriously, there needs to be enormous amounts of Any Dream Will Do slash. And wanting Top Gear Dog/Draco does not make you a freak, because it is blatantly obvious.

[misplacedmarble.livejournal.com]

I'M GOING TO SEE LEE LIIIIIIIIIIIIVE!

Well, I'm not actually as excited by this as I sound, because I didn't actually watch it properly - just watched my mum watching it and occasionally ran in when she squee-ed at something - but he was her favourite too, so she wanted to go see him in August for her birthday. BUT the only tickets we could get were for 20th December, so it's suddenly become my 'birthday treat'...Somehow. It should be fun, though.

And, having watched the clips, I say WRITE LEE/KEITH! Or I shall just have to wander around pining for some to read. ;D

[rionaleonhart]

Ooh, have fun!

The sad thing is that the final was the only episode I saw in full (my mum was usually watching the Grease thing competing with it), so I don't know how to characterise Lee and Keith properly, so I can't write it aaaaah! Somebody has to write it, or I will cry.

[emmarrrrr.livejournal.com]

JACK/ANYONE? MORE LIKE JACK/EVERYONE. AT ONCE.

JEREMY/FORD GT? NOOOOOOO. CLARKSON/VEYRON OTP!!!111oneone!!!

Lulz, Cameron/Janitor.

I agree with everything about Richard Hammond/Selphie Tilmitt. EVERYTHING.

Also. I did think that Lee and Keith were very gay and looked close to kissing at the point when Lee burst into tears all over the wee scotsman, y/n?

I NEED TO SEE LEE SING NEW YORK NEW YORK AGAIN. I'M ALSO GOING TO GO WATCH OH WHAT A CIRCUS AGAIN. THANKYOU KINDLY.

[talcat.livejournal.com]

I want to read Lee and Keith now and it's all your fault!

Haveing seen Lee and Josh Groban singing together and haveing seen Josh watching the guys sing I'd read Josh/Lee too.

[saaski-moql.livejournal.com]

GOD, STOP CORRUPTING ME. NOW I'VE ALL WATCHED THE CLIPS AND THINK THEY ARE INDEED CUTE. QUITE IT.

[rionaleonhart]

IF I'M GOING TO BE ATTACKED BY THE SLASHINESS I'M TAKING EVERYBODY WITH ME.

[harveytheayeaye.livejournal.com]

I have searched in vain for ADWD slash. There is none (although Keith...? why? lol) and I have decided the time has come for me to finally give up with "I'll never write RPF Ev0R!" and write it.

Also, I'm totally glad I'm not the only one who feels the need.

[rionaleonhart]

(Well, I don't find Keith remotely attractive, but I cannot deny how ridiculously adorable the way he will hug Lee at every opportunity is. I can be won over far too easily by subtext. Although you may as well strip the 'sub' out when it comes to Any Dream Will Do.)

IF YOU WRITE IT, I SHALL ADORE YOU FOR EVER. It's the most homoerotic thing I've seen in a very long time, and I cannot believe there isn't slash for it.

(And friending is always welcome! I've added you back, because I took a look at your journal and enjoyed your ramblings on Doctor Who and ADWD very much indeed.)