Trabia Garden

A friend mentioned she'd seen a comment about Light Yagami on a video about Shakespeare.

Riona: I suddenly and desperately want to see Death Note as written by Shakespeare.
Mori: Be the change you want to see.

I apologise for the results. This soliloquy is set during this scene from the first chapter of the manga (read the manga pages from right to left).

I... don't think I'll write any more of this? I very much hope I'm not going to write any more of this.


LIGHT:
Two men lie dead because I wrote their names,
A monstrous act - but wait, were not those men
Of monstrous acts themselves both culpable?
And yet the second weighs upon my soul;
His acts were grave, yet, to be met with death -
Before my eyes, a swift and brutal sight -
The penalty I dealt the man was steep;
Too steep, perhaps, for me to justify.
But - no. Why should I lie awake in bed
With visions of these ghosts within my mind?
What right have they to torment me like this?
The world is better off without their kind.
I'll wield my pen and cleanse the world of sin:
My right, my duty. Come now, let's begin.

I have been writing fanfiction for eighteen years, and I'm pretty sure this is the most fucked-up thing I've ever written.


Title: Bad Habits
Fandom: Detroit: Become Human
Rating: R
Pairing: Hank/Connor
Wordcount: 2,300
Summary: It's stress relief. He'll come back. (Hank has a lot of bad habits. Repeatedly murdering his partner is just one more.)
Warnings: Suicidal ideation, strangulation, generally fucked-up.


( Bad Habits )

SOMEONE IS WRITING FANFICTION FOR VISITORS. Someone is writing fanfiction for my Assassin's Creed fanfiction. This is so weird and I'm delighted.

Even better: someone is writing Visitors fanfiction with Shay/Aveline. Somehow I accidentally caught this 'ship (which there was literally no fanfiction for) while writing Visitors. They never canonically interact, but they could, theoretically; they were only born sixteen years apart. And there's definitely the potential for a really intriguing dynamic; they're kindred spirits in being pushed to doubt the Creed by their mentors, but they fight on different sides.

I'm glad someone else is carrying on the Visitors universe, because all my further ideas for it are unwritably ridiculous. I'm desperately trying to restrain myself from attempting Visitors (Gratuitous Wish-Fulfilment Edition): exactly the same concept, only everyone is constantly cuddling and falling asleep on each other. It would be terrible and deeply implausible. You don't know how much effort it took to keep myself from ending the 'traumatised post-hanging Ezio meets Desmond for the first time' scene with the two of them platonically bed-sharing. I keep going 'BUT SHAY'S TIMELINE OFFERS SO MUCH SCOPE FOR HUDDLING FOR WARMTH' and then having to drag myself away.

(I really want Shay to be warm. It's very important to me. I accidentally fell into freezing water in Rogue and couldn't find a way out and he froze to death and it was horrible.)

I'm not even a fluff writer most of the time, but apparently all I want to see from Assassin's Creed is this collection of mass-murderers snuggling up to each other.

And also Shay/Aveline. Seriously, I couldn't have ended up 'shipping two characters from the same game?

...aaaaand now I've written the below. Wow. This is embarrassing. I'm sorry that this journal has turned into nothing but weird self-indulgent AU fanfiction for a fandom none of you are in.


Title: Visitors (Gratuitous Wish-Fulfilment Edition)
Fandom: Assassin's Creed
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: Shay Cormac/Aveline de Grandpré
Wordcount: 9,000
Summary: Visitors was a collection of scenes from a universe in which most of the Assassin's Creed protagonists kept meeting through involuntary time-travel. This is the same, only now they all cuddle and fall asleep on each other. Don't give me that look.
Notes: These side-stories may occasionally conflict with the established Visitors timeline. It's the gratuitous wish-fulfilment edition and everything is permitted.


( Visitors (Gratuitous Wish-Fulfilment Edition) )


Part Two

Here are a few thousand words of obnoxiously meta Community fanfiction. I suppose it's technically a finished fic, but I'm not going to give it a proper title and header because that will make it An Official Fic I Wrote, and it is so obnoxiously meta that I am frankly ashamed of myself.

Seriously, it's so bad that the answer to the question 'when is this set?' is 'between Community's cancellation and Yahoo! Screen picking it up'. It has footnotes. I'm sorely tempted to delete this entry-in-progress and run off without posting it at all. But I suppose someone might find at least a little amusement in it, and so I'm going to take a deep breath and hit the 'post' button.

(You may suspect, correctly, that this started out as idle musing on a Community/Silent Hill crossover. I don't know how it turned into this.)


( Obnoxiously meta Community fic. )

I can't excuse this. I really can't. I was visiting my parents, and I rediscovered my old copies of The Poltergoose and The Toilet of Doom from Michael Lawrence's Jiggy McCue series, which I'd loved as a kid. Out of idle curiosity, I decided to find out whether anyone in the world had written Jiggy McCue fanfiction, and of course nobody had.

Somehow it seemed like the logical next step to write a ridiculous Animorphs crossover.

The Jiggy McCue series is a series of rather silly books aimed at twelve-year-olds, and I've never met anyone else who has read them. They do rely on gross-out humour sometimes, and I sort of wish they wouldn't, but what appeals to me about them is Jiggy's very chatty, informal style, laced throughout with terrible jokes and unnecessary clarifications ('I opened a drawer in my chest (of drawers)' is a line I'm particularly fond of). It's a lot of fun to read, and even more fun, it turns out, to write.

Which is why I've written eight thousand words of fanfiction that has no market at all.

Hooray!

(I've written it to be understandable to people who aren't familiar with the Jiggy McCue series (or indeed Animorphs), so you should be able to follow it if you just happen to be in the mood for something in the style of a ridiculous book series aimed at twelve-year-olds. I really hope at least one person in the world reads and enjoys this.)


Title: Earplugs Would Have Been Better
Fandom: Jiggy McCue series/Animorphs
Rating: PG
Wordcount: 8,300
Summary: I can't tell you who I am, or where I live. Or maybe I can? Jiggy McCue, Brook Farm Estate. That was actually pretty easy. Anyway, this is the story of the day I got possessed by an alien, which was probably only about the third-worst day of my life.


( Earplugs Would Have Been Better )

I did manage to find a good picture of smug Joshua in the end, so I've now created two manips of Joshua Kiryu wearing a tiny skirt. I'm not proud. If my previous entry failed to meet your Joshua-in-a-tiny-skirt needs, though (or even if it succeeded; sorry!), here you go:




Here he is posing flirtatiously and looking immensely pleased with himself. As well he should, because not many people could wear that tiny skirt as well as he does.

One reaper in The World Ends With You tells you he'll only let you pass if 'pretty boy' ('You're speaking to me?' asks Joshua) comes back in head-to-toe Natural Puppy, a girls' clothing brand. If you do dress Joshua in Natural Puppy, the reaper will say, 'Wow... you actually kinda work that.' I can readily believe it. (And then he doesn't let you pass after all, because he doesn't have the authority to remove the wall. The game just wanted an excuse to make you dress Joshua in girls' clothes.)

The clothing system in The World Ends With You does create some odd mental images sometimes. In my game, Joshua ended up wearing a patchy biker jacket over a girl's school uniform and work boots. Shiki is wearing a full-body cat suit and a pirate hat. Beat is carrying a rubber duck.

I'm going back over the chapters at the moment, trying to get all the Secret Reports, and there are so many things I missed the first time around! All this optional dialogue! The main thing I've gathered from my further exploration is that Joshua flirts with Neku even more than I'd originally realised.

There was a wonderful moment when I was trying to work out the location of one of the hidden items: I stared and stared at the clue 'SHOWN A DREAM', becoming increasingly frustrated as I had no idea what it meant, and then gave up and exited the menu and realised I was standing directly in front of the gigantic SHADOW RAMEN sign.

Ahahaha, awww, if you buy enough at le Grand the shop assistant develops a massive crush on you. I was already fond of the le Grand assistant because he was one of the few shopkeepers who didn't obviously resent me when I hung around for a while and then left without making a purchase; I suppose that was because just seeing Neku was enough for him. The proprietor of Shadow Ramen, meanwhile, assumes that you have a crush on him and gets really nervous whenever you're around. I'm tempted to max out friendship with all the shop assistants now, just to see how what they say changes (and to stop them getting annoyed when I leave without buying anything; stop making me feel bad, fictional shop assistants! It's starting to make me feel awkward when I leave shops without buying anything in real life!), but that would cost me an awful lot of yen.

I sort of want to write The World Ends With You fanfiction, but I don't have any ideas! Where are you, inspiration?

Upupupu!




oh my God no this is the worst crossover ever what am I doing.

Hello, everyone! Here is a pretty great My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic-style pony creator. I propose that we all create pony versions of our favourite fictional characters and then post them in the comments here.

(There is an option for importing a cutie mark image on the creator, but it resizes images oddly, so you may find it easier to add the mark yourself in an image editing program.)

To kick things off:



Now greatly alarmed, I cast about in search of Holmes, for I felt certain that my friend would be better able to explain this strange transformation than I.

I found him standing upon a precipice and looking down upon the town below, or I thought it must be him, for never had a beast been so alike in stance and mien to Sherlock Holmes. "Holmes!" I exclaimed, "what an extraordinary occurrence! what an impossibility! Have you any idea what has happened to us?"

"I have," said Holmes (for of course it was he). I was most relieved to hear it, although I had little doubted that he would know. If he knew what had brought about this change, I hoped he would also have some idea of what steps we could take to reverse it.

"Yes," said Holmes, gazing pensively upon the town. "It is highly probable, I have concluded, that we have been turned into ponies."




I liked Lightning when I first played Final Fantasy XIII, and I'm liking her more and more on this replay. Here is a brief plot summary of Final Fantasy XIII:

Anima: You get to be either a monster or a crystal! What'll it be?
Lightning: Actually, I'm just going to punch the world in the face.
Anima: That wasn't one of the options.
Lightning: I don't care.

She's pretty amazing.


Yes! Ponies! You are all invited to create ponies and pony up the comments. Have fun!

Q: Riona, why have you ineptly manipped John Marston onto Applejack's back?
A: Well, I felt that Applejack fit the Western theme of Red Dead Redemption better than any of the other ponies. I mean, using Rarity would have been ridiculous.

Q: Er, that wasn't exactly what I—
A: Goodness me, is that the time?





RED DEAD REDEMPONY: FRIENDSHIP IS WORTH TRACKING DOWN YOUR OLD GANG MEMBERS FOR.

– You take the role of John Marston. The government has kidnapped your best friends, which isn't very nice at all; now it's up to you to rescue them, and perhaps find some new friends along the way!

– Ride all six of the central ponies from My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic! Well, if you can. Fluttershy will hide whenever you're within half a mile of her, Rarity will buck you off if you try to ride her in rain and Rainbow Dash is practically impossible to lasso. Also, be aware that Pinkie Pie's bouncing means you have to play a keep-your-balance minigame constantly when you're on her back. Applejack, however, is a highly reliable steed and has a hat that complements yours.

– Play Horseshoes to your heart's content. Other minigames include hoof-wrestling, the Running of the Leaves and attempting to write a letter about what you've learnt to Princess Celestia despite being only semi-literate.

(EDIT: Wait a moment: I said that the government had carried out the kidnapping. Does that mean that Princess Celestia is responsible? I hope not, because that would make Marston even less likely to write her letters telling her what he's learnt about friendship, and I love that mental image far too much to give it up. Maybe Princess Celestia kidnapped Marston's friends because she felt that it was the only way to make Marston fully appreciate the magic of friendship? If you ever want to see your friends again, Marston, you are going to write those letters.)

– Keep an eye on your honour bar; if it gets too low, the ponies may not want to be friends with you any more. You can increase your honour by doing good things like helping your friends and decrease it by doing bad things like being dishonest or eating the cake Pinkie Pie has prepared for a big party tomorrow afternoon. (Note: although John Marston does carry a lot of guns, he obviously wouldn't dream of shooting them in Ponyville, and therefore there is no button for using weapons. If there were, though, using them would incur a massive honour penalty. Shame on you for even thinking about it.)

Okay. Here's what happened.

- The Left 4 Dead zombie apocalypse games were released.
- zarla and jazaaboo created some AU female versions of Left 4 Dead zombies.
- zarla and jazaaboo created an AU of the above AU in which the ladies did not in fact become zombies and instead had to fight their way through the zombie apocalypse.
- I wrote the below AU of the above AU of the above AU, in which all of the above and also they have superpowers.

So, yes, this is an AU of an AU of an AU of a game I've never played. This is, I'll confess, a bit ridiculous. But I really love these OCs and wanted to do something with them (well, all right, I did write the Hogwarts AU, but I wanted to involve all four of them this time). I hope I've done them justice.

The government's actions are incredibly implausible here. I don't know how they thought they were going to get away with that.



Title: You Missed 'Superpowers', Pandora (or, alternatively, 'yo dawg I heard you like AUs...')
Fandom: erm, the Left 4 Dead OCs over at respectawoman. Hunter and Smoker belong to zarla, Charger and Jockey to jazaaboo. You can find out more about them on this page.
Rating: R
Wordcount: 6,800
Summary: AU of the survivorverse AU. Shortly before the infection strikes, Hunter, Smoker, Charger and Jockey are caught in a storm with very strange effects. Loosely inspired by Misfits.
Warnings: violence, swearing, the sort of unpleasantness you'd associate with a zombie apocalypse.


( You Missed 'Superpowers', Pandora )