Extreme Romance.

[rionaleonhart]

(EDIT: Who just sent me an anonymous vgift? Thank you so much! ♥!)


Happy Valentine's Day! Would anyone like an incredibly terrible poem?

WARNING: I AM NOT JOKING WHEN I SAY THEY WILL BE INCREDIBLY TERRIBLE. Here are some of my compositions so far:

For my ex-housemate (but also dedicated with love to the Hannahs on my flist):

OH HANNAH
YOU ARE NOT A SPANNER
EVERYONE ELSE IS AN ALSO-RANNER
HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY


For my housemate from Nottingham and her unrhymable name:

OH RACH
OWING TO SOUTHERN INFLUENCE YOU NO LONGER DROP YOUR 'H'...S
HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY


For myself (yes, I composed a Valentine's Day poem for myself), and possibly the worst of the lot due to slightly unfortunate rhyming:

OH HARRIET
JOIN ME IN MY CHARIOT
LOTS OF LOVE FROM JUDAS ISCARIOT
HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY


If you would like an appalling poem, let me know in the comments! (If you give me your name and/or nicknames as well, that might make things easier.)

Comments

[rionaleonhart]

Kingdom of Loathing sounds hilarious! And I am bizarrely touched by that BASIC Valentine.


OH PATRICK
MY LOVE FOR YOU IS GALACTIC
ALTHOUGH I HAVE TO CONFESS THAT ON THIS OCCASION I HAD TO RESORT TO THE 'ONLINE RHYMING DICTIONARY' TACTIC

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY

[kadrin.livejournal.com]

IT IS THE BEST POEM EVER. Naturally I have to either now reciprocate or steal you away for a romantic journey to, I dunno, um, where are romantic journeys these days, somewhere exotic but with no shooting, anyway that sounds complicated so I'll just reciprocate.

OH HARRIET
YOU CAUGHT MY HEART WITH A LARIAT
SO NOW YOU'LL HAVE TO CARRY-IT
I DO HOPE YOU DON'T BURY-IT
OH COME ON THAT WAS TOTALLY A RHYME YOU DON'T HAVE TO DISPARRY-IT
(DISPARRY IS SHORT FOR DISPARAGE)
HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY

You should sign up (http://www.kingdomofloathing.com)! It's fun and free and hilarious and it doesn't take up too much time per day due to the Adventure limit and I certainly don't have an ulterior motive like speeding up the time until my rather small clan gets a Clan Basement to unlock Hobopolis and the Slime Tube.

Ahem.

The game features Somerset Lopez, Dread Mariachi.

[rionaleonhart]

My name is almost unrhymable! I am incredibly impressed! Even if you cheated a bit. ('Disparry-it' made me laugh extremely hard.)

Oh, dear. It's tempting, but I really can't justify signing up to an online game right now. Remind me in June and we'll see.

[kadrin.livejournal.com]

One could, at this point, pull a Lewis Carroll and make up strange creatures such as the "varriet" and "tentarriat", who indulge in forms of recreation known as "sarriet". But then one would have an army of uninspired fanboys taking all the wrong meanings from everything.

I SHALL DO SO, THEN.