And She Had A Fiery Sword That She Couldn't Put Down.

[rionaleonhart]

IT IS TIME TO SHARE EMBARRASSING OLD FANFICTION. I shall start us off by quoting a few paragraphs from the Final Fantasy X self-insertion I wrote a few chapters of between the ages of thirteen and fourteen. Please join in by sharing your own shame-inducing fanfiction in the comments, because otherwise I'm just going to hide in a corner for ever.

THE STORY SO FAR: Riona, who has an embarrassingly large crush on Tidus (ACTUAL QUOTE: She hit the ‘New Game’ button, and watched as the opening scene played out. She grinned to herself at the close-up of Tidus on the cliff. Wow, he was a bishounen (bolding of appalling fangirl Japanese-use mine)), has just woken up in Zanarkand at the beginning of Final Fantasy X, having been ~mysteriously transported~ into the game. Her reaction to this is essentially 'I've been sucked into the videogame I was playing? How peculiar. OH MAN I'D BETTER WARN DREAMY TIDUS ABOUT SIN.' (Come to think of it, I never did learn to write realistic reactions to clearly absurd events. But I like to think I'm at least a little better than 'Huh, I'm in Zanarkand. Wonder how that happened. Well, as I'm here, better go and warn a fictional character about the upcoming fictional disaster.')

Below the cut, you may see Riona's exceedingly smooth attempt at telling Tidus what is about to happen. I have made no changes to it, much though I'd like to.



There he was, signing some kid’s Blitzball. I skidded to a halt in front of him. “Tidus! Zanarkand, it...”

“Huh?” he asked, handing the Blitzball back to the kid and turning to face me.

“I...” I paused, confused. “I can’t remember anything...”

He looked at me, concerned. “You okay?”

“Uh...” I mumbled, “I think so. I’m sure there was something important I had to tell you...”

Tidus grinned, and I almost melted. He was so cute... “Can’t have been more important than the Blitzball game, could it?”

“No,” I admitted. “I guess not. Name’s Riona, and...” I paused. I had a dim feeling that I shouldn’t go telling people about my real-life. All I could remember about the game was Tidus’ name, the crush I had on him, and Blitzball. And the fact that everyone seemed to be able to breathe underwater.

Could I breathe underwater? Spotting a fountain, I ran to it and rammed my head under the water, forcing myself – though my mind resisted fiercely – to breathe in. It was fine – just like air, in fact. I smiled to myself and pulled my head out. Turning around, I saw Tidus looking like he was trying not to laugh.

“Riona, huh? Nice to meet ya.” I felt myself blushing – in the middle of speaking to my hero, I’d gone and shoved my head in a fountain. Not the smartest-looking thing to do. I started stuttering.

“Uh... sorry. I, erm, needed to cool down. Can I... erm...” I picked up a stray Blitzball. “Can I have your autograph?” I blurted.

Tidus took the ball and signed it, still shaking with silent laughter. He handed it back, then grinned at everyone there. “Okay, I’ve gotta go now. Cheer for me!” He began running down the path, and one firm idea popped spontaneously into my head: follow him.



SMOOTH. What worries me is that I can actually see myself behaving like this today.

(This is by no means the worst thing in my fanfiction folder - it's not even the worst part of this fic; later on you'll find the line 'Agony beyond anything I have ever felt!' used completely seriously, exclamation mark and all - but it's the worst I can actually bring myself to show you. WHY THE CRUSH ON TIDUS, SERIOUSLY.)

Comments

[th-esaurus.livejournal.com]

RIONAAAAAAAAAAA

LOL ILU

This is amazing.

[rionaleonhart]

SHUT UP, OKAY. SHUT UP. I WAS THIRTEEN. HE WAS ATTRACTIVE AND BARE-CHESTED.

[the-funmonkey.livejournal.com]

I do wish that I could join in with this but alas all my fic pre-2005 has been lost to the ages (GOD I FEEL OLD).

[rionaleonhart]

I sometimes wish mine had been, but I obsessively back things up. I've still got the EPICALLY DIRECTIONLESS POKÉMON JOURNEY story I wrote when I was twelve. (Also a self-insertion, but at least it was a slightly more subtle one; the main character wasn't actually called Riona.)

[emmarrrrr.livejournal.com]

hahahaha

this is pretty good compared to one of my old self-insert ff7/gundam wing fics. I HAD FOX EARS, A TAIL AND DIFFERENT COLOURED EYES. :x

also, lol crush on tidus.

[rionaleonhart]

I HAD FOX EARS, A TAIL AND DIFFERENT COLOURED EYES.

Ahahaha, that's wonderful. May I ask how the characters reacted to your unusual anatomy?

[culf.livejournal.com]

I once wanted to write self-insert where I ended up in the Buffyverse and dated Jonathan, but I luckily never got farther than a paragraph. I still think he should have a girlfriend, and if I ever met him in RL, I'd volunteer.
At least you're over this Tidus guy by now, so you're one step up on me. :)

[rionaleonhart]

I don't know Jonathan, but fancying him is probably better than ever fancying Tidus - who, let's face is, is gigantically thick and more than a little immature (sorry, Tidus, but you know it's true) - in the first place.

[geekgirlofdoom.livejournal.com]

Haha. Wow. I never wrote them down, fortunately. I had enough badfic going on without the self-insertions.

At the age of 13, though, I think I was mostly, like, hanging around the FBI for reasons I never bothered to come up with. Obviously Mulder and Scully would want a thirteen-year-old investigating missing-persons cases (which probably had something to do with aliens) with them. Obviously.

[rionaleonhart]

Oh, of course! Were it not for the minimum work age laws, I'm sure the FBI would be composed entirely of thirteen-year-olds.

[kaatsu.livejournal.com]

Ahaha, awww, that's kinda cute. :D I can totally beat you in embarrassing- I discovered fic when I was twelve, and immediately started writing about the epic romance between James from Pokemon and a magical girl called Angel, who had perfect white angel wings, and had Mew. Then they had babies (James and Angel, I mean, not James and Mew. Though, looking back, one of their children may actually have had ~*so kawaii*~ cat ears...).

At least this all had the grace to happen before ff.net was around, so all traces of my opus retardus disappeared from the net along with the angelfire TeAm RoCkEt shrine it was on.

[rionaleonhart]

Oh, dear, I can't stop grinning. Angel wings! Cat ears! A Mew!

There's something terribly charming about wish-fulfilment fanfiction from writers' early days, really. Reading this ridiculous synopsis warms my heart a little.

[dracothelizard.livejournal.com]

CRITICISING THE GAME LOGIC ALREADY.

Well, my Fanfiction.net (http://www.fanfiction.net/~dracothelizard) profile has plenty of embarrassing stuff. There's 'why not to get drunk' in which Vegeta gets drunk because Bulma kicked him out. And I steal quotes from Men Behaving Badly. There's also 'Raditz' arrival, with a little twist', in which Goku dies 2 minutes too early because he once smoked a cigarette, meaning he can't nobly sacrifice himself to save the Earth, and all this because I heard every cigarette takes 2 minutes from your life.

And as for Pokemon, well, I have 'New mottos', in which it's Team Rocket versus Ash, Misty and Brock as to who can have the best team motto.

As for my first fanfic, man, it was EPIC. It was friend I had inserted in there rather than myself, at least, and it involved her being captured by two evil wizards (Billy Corgan, singer in The Smashing Pumpkins and Daniel Jones, musician from Savage Garden) and an evil knight (Darren Hayes from Savage Garden) and two knights (played by the friend's favourite Dutch musicians) were going to save her. It also involved Pikachu electrocuting Darren and then Darren got SOMEHOW turned into a small yippy dog, which the friend decided to keep as a wedding present, since obviously she was going to marry the knight who had saved her! EPIC I TELL YOU.

THERE WAS ALSO A SEQUEL involving Darren's revenge and being turned back into a human again and some things, in which I am an EVIL WITCH except that I am under evil mind control from Tarabas, also an evil wizard (and also really, really hot in Fantaghiro) and eventually I become a good person and run off into the sunset with Daniel.

The best thing of it all? It's entirely in Dutch and not on the internet!

[rionaleonhart]

AHAHAHA, THAT'S AMAZING. Smoking a 'sigarett' shortens your life by two minutes even if you were going to die of non-natural causes! Brilliance!

Wow, you became a crackfic writer early on.

[twilit-wanderer.livejournal.com]

My oldest fanfiction is something I narrated to my mother at age, I don't know, five, that she typed up. It was about Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer, the claymation movie. It is hilarious, but I can't find it on this computer. Alas! And I took all the old stuff I can't stand to look at, typed it, copied it to a CD, and then buried it in storage a few months back.

They probably don't count, anyway, though, because mostly it's stories written at the request of a then-friend featuring her Sailor Moon self-insert. There's also a hideous FFVII AU I started out editing and ended up helping to write simply because of the massive amount of work every chapter ended up needing. WHY AM I SO WEAK, TO ALWAYS HELP WRITE THINGS I KNOW ARE AWFUL EVEN WHEN THE MAJORITY OF MY SOUL IS SCREAMING, "NOOOOOO!"


I don't believe I ever done any actual self-inserts (w-wait, does Final Fantasy XI count?). Part of me thinks I missed out on something. (Everyone else ever has! Why didn't I? Clearly there is something wrong with me?!) Mostly, though, I am very glad for this.

[pointytilly.livejournal.com]

I never wrote self-insert fic either, and my only Sues were intentional spoof. Now, stuff that was just plain crap, on the other hand...

SO YOU ARE NOT ALONE.

[pointytilly.livejournal.com]

Man, I have some really old really bad X-Files thing I wrote for English class (yeah, seriously) from when I was a kid, but I dunno where my copy of it's got to D:.

My little sister is writing fic now and keeps notebooks. I told her to never throw them out no matter what, because they'll be amusing as hell ten years from now.

[rionaleonhart]

I applaud your forethought in notebook-preservation! It saddens me enormously when old fiction is lost. Yes, there's the period of cringing and shame, but later you reach the point where you can look back and appreciate your younger self's heartfelt efforts.

And also mock them. But mostly appreciate.

[amy-wolf.livejournal.com]

I lost my really bad Doctor Who fanfic with the Mary-Sue (named, er Amy Wolf), who grew up during the Dalek invasion of Earth, and had massive angst (SHE ACCIDENTALLY KILLED HER PARENTS! BUT THE DALEKS HAD TURNED THEM INTO ROBOMEN AND SENT THEM TO DO THE SAME TO HER, SO SHE WAS TOTALLY JUSTIFIED AND IT WASN'T HER FAULT!), impossibly good hunting, fighting, and weapon-making skills, and post-invasion got to have a secret love affair with Susan Foreman, while totally showing Susan's husband up in terms of moral righteousness. Then tragically got killed at a young age.

This was never posted. It's probably for the best.

Here is some typo-laden Smallville fic for you: http://www.smallville.slashdom.net/cgi-bin/search.cgi?ShortResults=0&Title=&Title_Range=0&Author=amy+wolf&Author_Range=0&Summary=&Date=0&SortBy=0&SortOrder=0&NumToList=0&FastSearch=0

Feel free to find any embarrassing bits and share them with the whole journal.

[justspaz.livejournal.com]

That is adorably wonderful. I have never written self insert, because I don't find myself interesting enough, but I have written bad fic that I then consider canon and find myself playing the characters in the movies/tv show.

Like, I had this 3rd cousin of Harry Potter fic where she went to an orphanage/boarding school in the middle of Wales but she had the magical name Clairavay Raz. She went to Hogwarts finally, instead of the small Welsh Witchcraft Boarding Academy in her 6th year (Harry's 7th, which means horcrux time). It involved ~evil Snape too, which means I obviously was out of my mind.

So, I would imagine this being the seventh book and I becoming a dual citizen of the USA/England to be cast as her in the movie because I was already an Academy Award Winning Actress. YES.

Oh my goodness. :?

[rionaleonhart]

WHEE, LATE RESPONSE

That's beautiful. I hope your Welsh accent is up to scratch, because Clairavay Raz must be properly portrayed. (Clairavay Raz! Where did the name 'Clairavay' come from?)

[nano_moose]

I am finding your fourteen-year-old crush on Tidus to be COMPLETELY ADORABLE. Seriously it is, I want to hug them both a little bit.

My first fics were all about either Jak and Daxter or Invader Zim because at thirteen I was embarrassingly obsessed with them both (these days, of course, I'm embarrassingly obsessed with Thief instead. Hoy). They were all about a new female character I'd invented just for the fandom. She almost always had a best friend character as well, and they'd run around having adventures with the canon characters but - and here's the weird part - never actually kiss/date/do anything like that with any of them. There's only one, a Jak and Daxter one, where I made even the slightest attempt at something resembling romantic tension.

Hilariously, reading back over them I get more romantic vibes from the female OC's and the 'best friend' characters. I should probably look into that.

Oh man, I remember a fic when I explicitly pointed out Jak being unable to use his guns on the hoverboard because you can't in the game, never mind logic, and there was a big ridiculous heist where the strategy boiled down to 'shoot everything that moves, then everything that doesn't move.' And an explosion scene that I ripped off whole-sale from Matthew Reilly of all people. I loved writing fight scenes and shoot outs.

[lovestories.livejournal.com]

One Day On the Hogwarts Express (A 13 Year Old shizuka_blooms Tries Her Hand At Writing A Parody)

Harry Potter and Ron Weasley were talking animatedly about their summer holiday when a stunning, brunette beauty stood in the doorway. She batted her long, fluttery lashes, and flipped her smooth, caramel colored hair, with fresh blond highlights.

“Hey.” she said sexily. Ron started drooling. Harry’s jaw dropped, if not to the floor, quite a considerable length. The brunette stepped over the piles of sweets on the floor (somehow managing not to trip over her five-inch heels) and sat in Ron’s lap. Her black, leather mini dress rode up, exposing a lot of perfectly tanned thigh.

“You’re cute.” she purred seductively. Ron fainted.

Harry managed to sputter, “Err…who are you?” The brunette giggled, exposing perfect, white teeth.

“Don’t you remember? I’m Hermione!” she said.

“That’s impossible!” claimed Ron, who had come out of his little faint mysteriously quick. His outburst startled Hermione, who fell off his lap rather ungracefully. Unfortunately, she fell on a very sharp pair of tweezers placed strategically on the floor. Hermione examined her elbow, which was scratched slightly.

Hermione burst into tears and wailed, “My perfect skin!” Still crying, she slapped Ron, and ran out the compartment door.

“Err…” said Ron. Suddenly, at that moment, Harry realized he was passionately in love with his best friend (No, not Ron!)

“Ronald Bilius Weasley!” he bellowed “You bastard! How dare you drop Hermione, my one, true love?”

“Huh?” said Ron “I thought you liked Ginny.”

With a voice filled with rage, Harry screamed, “That brainless bimbo! How can you even think I like your loser of a sister better than Hermione? Ginny’s so ugly, especially now that she’s turned goth! She’ll never measure up to my perfect Hermione!” At that moment, Ginny waltzed in.

She twisted her (now black) hair around her finger and crooned, “Hey there Harry.”

Harry shrieked, “You supreme ugliness blinds me! GO AWAY!” Ginny started bawling, and ran out into the corridor.

“Hey!” said Ron. Harry punched him, and raced out of the compartment in search of Hermione.

Continued in the next comment because my 13 year old self was extremely wordy

[harveytheayeaye.livejournal.com]

“You supreme ugliness blinds me! GO AWAY!”

Sorry but this line cracked me up!

[lovestories.livejournal.com]

One Day On the Hogwarts Express (A 13 Year Old shizuka_blooms Tries Her Hand At Writing A Parody) Part 2

Draco Malfoy was strolling along the corridors of the Hogwarts Express when a stunning brunette in a tight, black mini dress collided into him. Even though she had knocked him down, he didn’t care. In fact, Draco had never been this stunned in his life. The girl who had bumped into him was crying, but her tears made her eyes sparkle. Instead of looking really ugly like most girls did when they cried, this one looked even more ravishing than girls do on a daily basis. Even though he didn’t know her (or so he thought) Draco Malfoy was head over heels in love. He took her hands in his and claimed his never-ending adoration.

“I don’t know who you are, but I’ll do anything for you! I’ll jump off the top of the Astronomy Tower! I’ll shag Hermione Granger! I know you don’t know who that is, but no one would shag that Mudblood. Hell, even Potter’s not that desperate!” The brunette’s sultry, brown eyes looked into Draco’s cold, gray ones.

“I love you too Drakie-poo” she said.

After having a good snog, Draco picked up the brunette and said, “So who are you anyway?”

The brunette giggled, and chirped, “I’m Hermione silly!” THUD. Hermione fell to the floor for the second time in ten minutes. This time, it was on a hot iron placed flat side up. Needless to say (but I’ll put it in for good measure) Hermione got burned; on her elbow no less. Meanwhile, Draco had procured a bottle of mouthwash and was busy “swishing”. Unfortunately for Hermione, when he was done “swishing”, he spit on her shoes; Prada, size 6. Hermione looked at her ruined heels, and her burned (and scratched) elbow

It was too much for her.

She burst into tears, and bumped into…a Weasley (no, not Ron)! Of course, Hermione and Ginny recognized each other even though they had both undergone personality-changing, summer makeovers. Hermione, who was relieved to see her best female friend even though she had turned Goth, reached out to give Ginny a big hug. However, after being brusquely brushed off by Harry, Ginny was in a rather irritable mood. She grabbed Hermione’s sleek, brown hair and aimed a dragon roundhouse kick at her side. Ginny had never been one for solving conflicts physically, but its funny how being hugged by your ex-best friend can bring out the best in you. Ginny accompanied her kicking with a well-improvised commentary.

“You bitch!” she screamed, “You stole Harry from me! I was going to marry him so I could become rich and famous, but you got in the way!” If random people were peeking out of their compartment doors to see what the ruckus was about, they would have been amazed that Ginny could be heard over Hermione’s high-pitched shrieking. However, there weren’t any random people peeking out of their compartment doors to see what the ruckus was about because Dumbledore had gotten the compartments of the Hogwarts Express soundproofed. Anyway, “Marrying Harry was my greatest dream!” continued Ginny, “Especially now that I’m a Death Eater! After I kill Harry, He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named-But-Is-Extremely-Hot will snog me!"

Hermione stopped screaming long enough to say, “You think VOLDIE is hot!”
“Don’t Call him Voldie!” screeched Ginny, “Older men appeal to me, and everyone knows that there’s nothing as sexy as a bald head! Besides, every girl wants a man with a big snake!”

It was at that moment that Ginny tripped over the hot iron placed flat side up. She sent Hermione sailing through the air, into a compartment, (the door was open, but somehow, the occupant inside had stayed unconscious through the racket Hermione and Ginny were making) and right on to someone’s lap.


Dear Lord, apparently it's too long even for TWO comment boxes.

[harveytheayeaye.livejournal.com]

I have never written self-insert fic... yet.

But I have been on a quest to find various fics of SHAAAME!
I succeeded btw: I found a recent Torchwood piece where everyone - through God knows what reason - decides to have sex with everyone else at Torchwood and they ALL get knocked up... even the Weevil... I have NO SHAME! (I'm also not even sure who has who's baby, because Jack goes to have sex with Rhys to get back at Gwen for having sex with him, and Jack shags the Weevil.. cuz it's Jack and I think Owen does too, out of curiousity...)
There's also the one that was written as a request: Torchwood gets a Wii....

Here, is a small snippet from the biggest load of WANGST I have ever written. (I don't even have the "I was only 13!" excuse. It was only last year... I should know better)

"It seemed they were all destined to die alone. In a way he was jealous of the others. Eventually they would find release when death would bring an end to all this heartache. Even the Doctor would eventually know it once he was finished all regenerations. But his fate was to carry this burden in his heart for eternity. Dying alone seems more inviting than living alone forevermore.

Checkmate."

[rionaleonhart]

Man, that's no worse than the canonical angst in Torchwood. And the 'everyone has sex with everyone else and they all get knocked up' plot also sounds plausible. Is it even possible to write Torchwood badfic?

[lovestories.livejournal.com]

One Day On the Hogwarts Express (A 13 Year Old shizuka_blooms Tries Her Hand At Writing A Parody) Part 3

Ronald Weasley was slowly returning to consciousness. His eyes hurt (so he decided no to open them), and for some reason his legs felt heavy, almost like something was on them. He reached down to see if he could guess what was on his legs without opening his eyes. Hmmm. Whatever it was was soft and squishy.

“Maybe it’s a Loofa sponge.” thought Ron hopefully. He had an affinity for Loofa sponges. Unfortunately for Ron, it wasn’t a Loofa sponge, it was a breast, and its owner was getting redder by the second. When Ron decided to open his eyes, he was met with the sight of the beautiful brunette in his arms. Suddenly, Run realized he was holding (not to mention squeezing) her breast.

“Err…” he said. At that moment, Hermione lost it.

“Ronald Bilius Weasley!” she exclaimed, while scrambling off his lap, “I can’t believe you’re trying to molest me at a time like this! I thought we were friends! Do you have anything to say for yourself!”

“Uhhh…” said Ron.

Hermione shrieked and slapped him. “I hate you!” she screamed over her shoulder, as she stumbled out into the corridor and right into the witch who pulls the food trolley.

“Anything off the trolley dear?” asked the witch.

“NO!” shouted an agitated Hermione. In her moment of rage, she tried to kick over the food trolley, and injured her big toe. Hermione screamed, and started to wail. She raced down the train corridor in pain and embarrassment. Meanwhile, the witch bent down to pick up the gum that had fallen off the trolley during Hermione’s little tantrum.

“Children these days…” she muttered.

THE END.


...I forgot how bad this was until I actually read it again.

[rionaleonhart]

For a thirteen-year-old, I'd say that's actually pretty good, despite the rampant Hermione-bashing. It has genuinely amusing bits, at least ('My perfect skin!' 'Huh? I thought you liked Ginny.' 'Needless to say (but I’ll put it in for good measure)...'). Also, I find the dropping-in of 'especially now that she's turned goth!' absolutely hilarious.

[eva-kasumi.livejournal.com]

I was going to link you to my stuff on the ASMR fanfic archive, but by some fortuitous set of circumstances it seems that the site has recently been lost to the fickle whimsies of the databorg.

So instead you get... some... hideous Pokemon thing that was presumably a self-insert. I think I was... "Kris." Oh god.

Misty jumped up angrily and glared at the person she had bumped into. “Watch where you’re go-” she was struck dumb as she finally got a good look at the silent girl standing in front of her. Frayed blue shorts, yellow sleeveless vest, scuffy sneakers, purple knapsack slung casually, almost carelessly, over one shoulder. Completely normal attire for any traveler on the road. What scared Misty was the girl’s face. She’d seen it before… where? She looked at the twin pigtails of bright red hair, back at the face, and blanched. She’d seen that face the last time she’d looked in a mirror. She hadn’t seen a mirror in almost two months, so it wasn’t very surprising she had missed the resemblance at first, but it was definitely there. There were differences- Misty’s own green eyes were replaced by a smoky blue, and the features were softer, less defined, giving the girl an almost childlike appearance.
Misty shrieked and stumbled backwards. The girl continued to stand, unmoving, staring at her in what Misty decided was a very unnerving fashion. “You look like me.” The girl’s voice was so soft that Misty almost thought that she hadn’t spoken at all. Misty just moved her jaw up and down, for once in her life at a loss for words. Before she could gather her thoughts and reply, the sound of running footsteps pounded down the path and another girl jogged into view behind the first. Slightly taller, with long auburn hair in a high ponytail, she wore a pale green tank and tan Capri’s, and a yellow mini backpack pounded against her back as she ran. “Kris!” she cried as she reached the first girl. “What are you doing?”
‘Kris’ didn’t reply, or even remove her gaze from Misty. The new arrival seemed unaware of Misty’s presence, so she coughed politely. The auburn head whipped sharply toward her, but then she gasped and covered her mouth with her hands, looking wildly from Misty to Kris and then back to Misty again. Misty was actually somewhat reassured by this display, as the first girl’s silent stare had seriously disturbed her.

2-parter ARG

[eva-kasumi.livejournal.com]

(these are in two different documents; I don't know which one was supposed to come first. probably this one, actually)
“………..” finished Sam, running her fingers through her long auburn hair. “Pretty neat story, huh? I wonder if there are any more on the walls of these old ruins.”
“That was awesome! Wouldn’t it be cool if we were those two girls from the legend?” came a perky voice from somewhere below. Sam turned around to find herself face-to-face with a pair of sneakers.
“Kris!” she snapped at the upside-down girl they were attached to. “What are you doing?”
“Handstand,” came the matter-of-fact reply.
“I can see that,” Sam growled impatiently at her friend. “I meant why?”
“’Cause it’s fun?”
Sam gave an exasperated sigh, but she couldn’t help but grin at her friend’s antics. “Come on, you nutcase,” she laughed, moving towards the door. “We still have a long way to go if we want to make it to Cherrygrove by nightfall.”
The redhead grunted, by made no move to comply.
“Come on,” Sam repeated.
There was a pause before Kris answered meekly, “I can’t.”
“What? Why not?”
Kris gave a sheepish grin, “I’m stuck.”
Sam slapped a hand to her forehead. “Oh boy. Okay, just do as I say. Bend your knees and bring your legs down one at a time.”
There was a loud thud as Kris hit the ground in a heap. “Ow…” she moaned.
“Come on,” Sam said as she grasped Kris’s hand and pulled her up. “Honestly, what would you do without me?”
“Probably save myself from a whole lot of bodily harm,” Kris muttered darkly, rubbing her sore back. She grabbed her purple knapsack off the floor and raced out the door after Sam.
“Wait up!”


THAT'S ALL SHE WROTE. THANK THE LORD. PLEASE REJOICE. in this folder of "old gawdawful crap" there is also, apparently, Sailor Moon fic, a modern Zelda AU, and a Golden Sun/FFX script-format recasting crossover--I AM SO GLAD I NEVER FINISHED THESE

Also I am terrified of rereading Raw Horizon, but to criticize that would be to criticize YOUR tastes, and I suppose I can't fault it when it allowed me to meet such a wonderful person as you. Besides, I'm sure your tastes have rather improved in four years, because that's what peoples' tastes do, so if you tell me that you would never in a million years go near the stuff you read back then, I will not be offended in the least. ^^;

[saaski-moql.livejournal.com]

First person. Riona. FIRST. PERSON.

Although I think it does say something, really, that I can call this well-written even with all the blatant fourteen-year-old-fangirl. Like, you did a good job. Like...I would have read this and said "okay...not lovin this whole first person-y self insert but the girl has some potential." AND LOOK. LOOK AT WHAT, YEARS LATER, THIS POTENTIAL BLOSSOMED INTO.

You stuck your head in a FOUNTAIN what XD

[rionaleonhart]

Awesome! I am glad that my potential shone through even in my appallingly fangirlish self-insert.

IT SEEMED THE LOGICAL THING TO DO AT THE TIME

[johnnypurple.livejournal.com]

*cackles* that is awesome! the lolz. the lolz!

i'm not sure i have any teenage fic to show. i was a bit late to the fic-writing game. but my first fic is a harry potter/yu-gi-oh crossover which has some sort of competition/challege involving wrapping a roy orbison impersonator in cling film. so, really, not much has changed (considering the last thing i wrote was TG in cling film! lol). if you want to read some of it, i could dig it out from who knows where. i did write it while at work at a boring telephone job. that could explain it. possibly. *wink*

[thebaconfat.livejournal.com]

HAHAHAHHA Oh, ohhhh, this is fabulous. Sticking your head in the fountain!

Thirteen, thirteen, let's see...

[bubbles-san.livejournal.com]

Ah yes. Thirteen was my first time fandoming Big Guy and Rusty. I was, er, I was related to Lt. Hunter, I think I was his neice, and I was sent to live with him on the Dark Horse for reasons that changed steadily (usually involved my parents getting killed, me getting in trouble, or just a summer away from home thing.) I of course found out the Big Guy's secret, and of course I was able to comprehend and even assist Dr. Slate on some super complicated experiments, and I may have helped save the world a few times.

And I think in one version I had a Vulpix. Or a Rattata. Or maybe it was an Abra. I can't remember. Oh. I've been randomly inserting Pokemon into things for years, haven't I? And, incidentally, *points at icon*