Look How The Evil Flakes Fall On Everyone.

[rionaleonhart]

I'm not very good at April Fools' Day. I considered making a big fake 'I'M LEAVING FANDOM, GOODBYE FOREVER' post, but what I've decided to do instead is this:

- You post the worst fanfiction idea you can think of in the comments. Inappropriate crossovers, incompatible pairings, stupid AUs or just wildly out-of-character behaviour: all are welcome here. 'Squall Leonhart gives up being a SeeD to pursue his dream of becoming a telemarketer', for example, or 'Silent Hill 2 AU: Pyramid Head is a florist, James Sunderland is a regular customer, love ensues'.
- I unwisely attempt to write a few lines of that fic.

It's sort of in the spirit of the day, if not a traditional April Fools' joke. Prompt away! (If you make a request featuring a fandom with which I am not familiar, I reserve the right to make things up based solely on the fandom's name.)

THIS IS SUCH A BAD IDEA. I suppose that's sort of the point, but still. SUCH A BAD IDEA.

Comments

[petrol.livejournal.com]

Hello. I would very much like Charlie Brooker to go to Hogwarts. Thank you. *runs away*

[darkest-alchemy.livejournal.com]

Erm, Derren becomes a pop star, singing songs about God and Jesus and how awesome religion is. I think that counts as a stupid AU and wildly OOC behaviour.

[faeries-bite.livejournal.com]

Josh attempts to court Charlie Brooker.

[marginaliana]

OMG, I love you. I love you A LOT.

[amy-wolf.livejournal.com]

Technically, there are supposed to be six elements of harmony, so even with the Stig included, they're two short. They've definitely got Laughter and Loyalty covered, and the Stig could be Magic. As far as Honesty, Kindness, and Generosity, they do have their moments.

[marginaliana]

Mitchell and Brooker or Webb in a Good Omens AU, but Mitchell is the demon and Brooker/Webb is the angel.

[amy-wolf.livejournal.com]

Draco came up with the idea!

[dracothelizard.livejournal.com]

"All right, time for some honesty: Hammond, you look ridiculous in that shirt."
"I look ridiculous? What about May?"
"Yes, fine, you BOTH look ridiculous. Is that honest enough? Do I need to point out how stupid their choice of pony is as well?"

[amy-wolf.livejournal.com]

Would Richard want to ride Rainbow Dash or Applejack, do you think? Rainbow Dash is all adventurous and prone to tearing around at high speeds, but Applejack is very down-home and country, and has a cowboy hat. If Richard was on Applejack, Jeremy would want to ride Rainbow Dash, and if Richard was on Rainbow Dash, Jeremy would be all "I want a dragon!"

James would want to ride Twilight Sparkle, so he could have some intelligent conversation.

[dracothelizard.livejournal.com]

Richard would insist on trying both, as a fair comparison, while James locks himself in the library with Twilight, trying to find a way back home.

And then Pinkie Pie throws them a party.

[amy-wolf.livejournal.com]

OMG, a Pinkie Pie party! They totally need to have a Pinkie Pie party! With a song and everything!

[dracothelizard.livejournal.com]

DEFINITELY a song, and lots of Applejack's Apple-everythings.

[amy-wolf.livejournal.com]

Jeremy would pretend to hate it, but then Pinkie Pie would look sad, and he'd be all "Er...just kidding! Can I have some more apple juice?"

[dracothelizard.livejournal.com]

You can't remain angry at Pinkie Pie, she's that good.

[amy-wolf.livejournal.com]

She's Pinkie Pie! She's too bouncy to be angry at!

[dracothelizard.livejournal.com]

Jeremy would drag her with him everywhere, hoping the 'you cannot be angry at me!' field rubs off on him.

[amy-wolf.livejournal.com]

He'd say something that upset people and then go "Look! A pony!" and Pinkie Pie would start talking, and confuse them out of being offended, and she'd be so happy that he wanted her around all of the time!

[dracothelizard.livejournal.com]

Besides, Jeremy likes donkeys, I can see him becoming very fond of ponies. And pretend he isn't.

[amy-wolf.livejournal.com]

He so would. When no one was looking, he'd brush their fur and braid their tails and everything. But in a manly way! No ribbons!

[dracothelizard.livejournal.com]

He tells Rarity to talk to Hammond instead, and then goes back to untangling Pinkie Pie's tail and putting racing stripes on Rainbow Dash.

[amy-wolf.livejournal.com]

And Richard would be all "I don't do girly pony decoration!" but then Rarity would get him talking about hair/mane care products, and they'd be discussing shampoo forever!

[dracothelizard.livejournal.com]

Rarity tries to style him, but first needs lessons in human fashion.

[amy-wolf.livejournal.com]

He'd be all "Human men don't really wear that many sparkles", but she'd have met Mark already, so she wouldn't believe him.

[dracothelizard.livejournal.com]

And Richard DID agree with the cape.

Also, I'm watching the episode where Gilda the Griffon shows up, and, er, Pinkie Pie is also a batshit inventor, with her flying machine. I did not expect that.

[amy-wolf.livejournal.com]

She needs to meet Jeremy!