Look How The Evil Flakes Fall On Everyone.

[rionaleonhart]

I'm not very good at April Fools' Day. I considered making a big fake 'I'M LEAVING FANDOM, GOODBYE FOREVER' post, but what I've decided to do instead is this:

- You post the worst fanfiction idea you can think of in the comments. Inappropriate crossovers, incompatible pairings, stupid AUs or just wildly out-of-character behaviour: all are welcome here. 'Squall Leonhart gives up being a SeeD to pursue his dream of becoming a telemarketer', for example, or 'Silent Hill 2 AU: Pyramid Head is a florist, James Sunderland is a regular customer, love ensues'.
- I unwisely attempt to write a few lines of that fic.

It's sort of in the spirit of the day, if not a traditional April Fools' joke. Prompt away! (If you make a request featuring a fandom with which I am not familiar, I reserve the right to make things up based solely on the fandom's name.)

THIS IS SUCH A BAD IDEA. I suppose that's sort of the point, but still. SUCH A BAD IDEA.

Comments

[amy-wolf.livejournal.com]

He'd be all "Human men don't really wear that many sparkles", but she'd have met Mark already, so she wouldn't believe him.

[dracothelizard.livejournal.com]

And Richard DID agree with the cape.

Also, I'm watching the episode where Gilda the Griffon shows up, and, er, Pinkie Pie is also a batshit inventor, with her flying machine. I did not expect that.

[amy-wolf.livejournal.com]

She needs to meet Jeremy!

[dracothelizard.livejournal.com]

"Have you considered adding an engine?"
"What's that?"

And then, some time later, there would be a massive explosion, which Pinkie Pie finds hilarious.

[amy-wolf.livejournal.com]

Pinkie Pie would think that explosions were some wonderful new invention.

[dracothelizard.livejournal.com]

But they need more sparkles.

[amy-wolf.livejournal.com]

Jeremy would offer to blow up something sparkly. Mark would have to hide out with Rarity for his own safety.

[dracothelizard.livejournal.com]

She'd try to disguise him as a pony.

[amy-wolf.livejournal.com]

Gary would see that and be all "You've become one of them! Aaah!"

[dracothelizard.livejournal.com]

"YOU HAVE BECOME A PONY-HUMAN MONSTER HYBRID!"
"No, no, I'm hiding from Jeremy!"

But then Gary has already run screaming.

[amy-wolf.livejournal.com]

Gary would run to Robbie, who'd be all "Hybridization! That explains all of the abductions!" And Mark would be going "It's just a costume!"

[dracothelizard.livejournal.com]

Gary insists they get a proper scientists, Robbie insists he can do his own research on Mark, thankyouverymuch.

[amy-wolf.livejournal.com]

Eventually, through the scientific method of undressing Mark, Robbie works out that the human-space pony hybrid theory isn't terribly accurate.

[dracothelizard.livejournal.com]

The ponies definitely ask them to leave after that.

[amy-wolf.livejournal.com]

Although Pinkie Pie would be all "Come on, can't I keep him?"

[dracothelizard.livejournal.com]

It's the first time the other ponies tell her 'NO'.

[amy-wolf.livejournal.com]

Poor Pinkie Pie. No pet Robbie Williams for her.

But then Jeremy from Peep Show turns up, and they start a band together, and he teaches her to smoke grass. (It's actual grass, and not at all intoxicating, but he refuses to believe that.)

This lasts for about a week, before Pinkie Pie learns that smoking is bad, and Jeremy is sent home.

[dracothelizard.livejournal.com]

Peep Show Mark is also wary of the ponies, but not to the point where he tries to run screaming. He and Fluttershy get along quite well.

[amy-wolf.livejournal.com]

You think? I can picture him enjoying that for a short stretch, but her personality would be far too fluffy for him to put up with for any length of time. And Twilight Sparkle may have a massive library, but none of her books are about war.

[dracothelizard.livejournal.com]

And he doesn't think having a baby dragon in a library is quite safe.

But at least Fluttershy doesn't try to race him, or insists on giving him a party.

[rionaleonhart]

My immediate thought upon seeing 'Jeremy' and 'Mark' in the same comment was that this discussion had somehow shifted to a Peep Show crossover. I was quite disappointed to realise it was, presumably, Take That.

[amy-wolf.livejournal.com]

Yeah, there's a Mark in Take That, which adds to the confusion. Mark from Peep Show would have a very different reaction to the ponies.

[rionaleonhart]

I'm almost tempted to watch this now, just so I can work out how Mark Corrigan would react. I'm leaning towards 'assume he was having a mental breakdown; really, it seems almost about time' at the moment.

[amy-wolf.livejournal.com]

I suspect he would. Jeremy would just keep taking drugs until he was stoned enough that it made sense for him to be talking to a magic unicorn, then go hang out with Pinky Pie because she's the musician of the group.

...I suspect Mark would be completely incapable of coping in Ponyville, now that I think about it. If he ever stopped assuming he was having a breakdown, he might start having one for real.

Proof Jeremy and Pinkie Pie should start a band together!

[amy-wolf.livejournal.com]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UVipLfHLi94&feature=related

Can't you just picture Jeremy setting that to a drum machine beat and insisting they were going to be famous?