Where's The Paper?

[rionaleonhart]

Real-Life Conversation Theatre:
Riona: (at university, speaking to sparklenight) I could actually show a clip from Newswipe in one of our Discourse in Public Life seminars; it'd be completely relevant. I'd just have to find one where he isn't...
Coursemate: Hi!
Riona: ...swearing outrageously or pretending to masturbate. Hello!
Coursemate: ...my God, what are you talking about?


Even random YouTube commenters, I have discovered in my browsings, 'ship Charlie Brooker/David Mitchell!

Yes, but [The Big Fat Quiz] was quite amusing. David Mitchell was his partner (now that sounds... quite right).

Aww. David Mitchell and Charlie Brooker would make such a cute couple. There'd be an eternal spiral of self-deprecation and nihilism, so much so that their little cottage would be consumed into a whirlpool of misery. It'd be brilliant.

(An interesting side-note: these may quite possibly be the only coherent comments I have seen on the whole of YouTube. From this sample, I can draw the highly scientific conclusion that Mitchell/Brooker 'shippers are the only YouTube users who know the slightest thing about spelling and punctuation. Therefore, 'shipping Mitchell/Brooker improves intelligence. Solid fact.)

Sorry about all of the Brooker/Mitchell entries, guys! (And sorry for the inconsistent name ordering; I haven't yet settled on which permutation I prefer.) I think I just need an outlet, because I appear to have abruptly fallen in love with the idea of a pairing that literally nobody has written. With Mark/Jeremy, at least I have the subtext of Peep Show itself to console me in the near-absence of fanfiction by people who have picked up on it; Brooker and Mitchell have very little recorded interaction. I really have no excuse for 'shipping them. But 'ship them I do, and it has left me with a craving for which not even the Internet, it seems, can cater. They could hypothetically be so interesting!

The thought of writing either Brooker or Mitchell intimidates me, but it is looking increasingly as if I must at least attempt this. Just so it exists on the Internet somewhere. In fact, the more Screenwipe I watch, the trickier it becomes to keep Brooker's style of speaking from leaking into my journal entries, so I may not need to worry about capturing his voice; I just have to keep watching his programmes until I actually become Charlie Brooker.

Anyway, enough moaning, because I've just worked out which Pokémon Brooker would have on his primary team, and the idea delights me. Please enjoy this visual argument for Voltorb and Onix.




I never thought it was possible for a man to look more like an Onix than Jeremy Clarkson did. I was wrong.

Comments

[dracothelizard.livejournal.com]

Did you base the choices on the fact that Brooker, Voltorb AND Onix look rather frowny?

[zeitheist.livejournal.com]

Sorry about all of the Brooker/Mitchell entries, guys!

Why are you apologizing!? All these entries are utterly delightful.

Also, the less said about Charlie Brooker's uncanny resemblance to an Onix, the better. (He SO DOES, though. It's unnerving)

[serriadh.livejournal.com]

'I've never met someone who really doesn't dance before,' Charlie says, in one of the breaks in the mammoth, never-ending recording of Big Fat Quiz. David looks slightly hurt and Charlie hastens to explain. 'I mean, I bet you don't even dance when you're really drunk and all your friends try to make you, do you?'

'No,' says David quietly. 'I have a very low embarrassment threshold, as well as a low tolerance for doing new things, particularly new things that I know I'll be crap at. Perhaps you're just more outgoing?'

Charlie gives a bark of laughter. 'Nah. It's more that I'm a pathetic people-pleasing wanker.'

'But it doesn't work,' David says before thinking. Charlie looks like he's been slapped. 'I mean, you do all those things they want you to - drink, dance, sing, have one night stands and stay up all night smoking cannabis rather than writing your essays and they still don't really like you. And the few that do like you seem to do so even though you do none of those things.'

'You're lucky to have Rob,' Charlie says bleakly, and David doesn't know what to say to that. This is hardly the place to explain the whole Rob situation to a nearly complete stranger, no matter how similar they seem to be. (Though not that similar, David thinks, who knows only enough about cool to be able to diagnose it in others. Charlie has it, which seems unfair.)

[truly-bohemian.livejournal.com]

I am just so thrilled to hear Mitchell/Brooker mentioned on my f-list, that I had to bounce in here and say YESSSSSS. I wrote David Mitchell/Lee Mack once, but the idea of writing this scares me because their fictional relationship is a truly beautiful thing. So, if you did write it, I, for one, would be insanely happy. :3

[nixwilliams.livejournal.com]

these may quite possibly be the only coherent comments I have seen on the whole of YouTube

VERY TRUE. i can hardly believe that's where you got them!

[darkest-alchemy.livejournal.com]

I wish I'd known someone like you at university.
I have no idea what Newswipe is (or indeed, who Charlie Brooker is) but using clips of it has got to be better than showing clips from Buffy the Vampire Slayer in a uni presentation (I got outvoted by the people I did it with; I hate Buffy and even worse, it was a presentation advocating its inclusion as something to be studied on a course about horror. Everyone else chose actual horror films. We did Buffy. I think I was probably cringing throughout the entire presentation).

[sunlightdances.livejournal.com]

*joy* You are insane.

[bubbles-san.livejournal.com]

RIONA RIONA. Today, I went on the internet, and I found this (http://hapuriainen.deviantart.com/art/Pokemon-trainer-dress-up-125433419) and immediately thought of you.

[cobecat.livejournal.com]

He has the exact same nose as the Onyx. I'm really impressed.

[amy-wolf.livejournal.com]

Okay, this is apropos of absolutely nothing (and lacks giant mechanical spiders, oddly enough), but you should watch this clip:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BaHvM9KVpcw

It's got Sherlock Holmes in it. Sort of.

Cannot get them out of my head.

[apiphile.livejournal.com]

"Would you ... ow, no, the other way--"

"Well how am I supposed to go the other way when your elbow's right there?"

"You could have asked and -- oh god I've got cramp in my leg I've got cramp in my leg--"

"Do you want me to go on... I mean I can probably..."

"... I hope that isn't commentary on my technique. This really hurts. Ow."

"Well I'm not exactly thrilled about having your knuckles digging into my spine either."

"Is that your back? I thought it was the mattress."

"The mattress is not that greasy. How's your leg?"

"...better. Look, I know this is a radical idea but maybe we should try this with the lights on?"

"Do you really, really want to be able to see our flabby pale naked bodies slapping against each other, David?"

"Well when you put it like that."

"Exactly."

[subtle-rift.livejournal.com]

He has the look of a man who has kept his voltorb from evolving so that it learns swift and explosion earlier, and feels no insecurity for not having an electrode.