I Am Humming 'Viridian City' Whilst Typing This Entry, Incidentally.

[rionaleonhart]

Why can't I stop thinking about this ridiculous pairing? Here is some thoroughly excessive rambling about bad Charlie Brooker/David Mitchell fic ideas. Perhaps at some point I should actually attempt to write a couple of these, rather than simply inflicting the concepts upon my long-suffering flist.


The Fic In Which Charlie Brooker and David Mitchell Fight Zombies.

Mr Mitchell is to begin hosting a panel show called The Bubble quite soon, I believe. The idea is that the panellists are locked away from the outside world for three days, then presented with news items and asked to determine whether they actually occurred during their incarceration or whether they were simply made up.

This is obviously the ideal setting for maximum Dead Set similarity. Brooker is in the bubble (I assume that the title of the programme refers to the panellists' prison); Mitchell is visiting the bubble for some reason; ZOMBIE OUTBREAK.

I... haven't actually watched Dead Set, I have to confess, on account of being a wimp and a coward (zombies are scary!), and watching Dead Set would definitely be a prerequisite for this fic. But I do think it should exist. (To those of you who've seen Dead Set: should I watch it? Do you think I'd enjoy it? Will it make me freak out and cry?)


The Fic In Which Charlie Brooker Is A Panellist On The Bubble And David Mitchell Visits Him In His Incarceration Slightly More Than Necessary, Or Maybe The Door Lock Malfunctions Or Something And Both Mitchell And Brooker Are Trapped Together, I Don't Know Enough About The Bubble To Know Whether That Would Be Feasible, But In Any Case They Fall In Love And It's Brilliant.

Because I realised whilst writing about The Bubble up there that I really wanted this. This is frustrating, because it is a fic idea requiring research that at present cannot be done. I hope we get some information about the conditions in which the panellists are held when The Bubble begins.


The Inevitable Charlie Brooker/David Mitchell Pokémon Crossover.

The mental conversation I just had with myself:

Riona: Where would David Mitchell live, if he lived in the Pokémon world?
Riona's Mind: Pewter City.
Riona: And which Gym would Charlie Brook—
Riona's Mind: Pewter City.

APPARENTLY IT IS THE MOST OBVIOUS THING IN THE WORLD THAT BOTH MITCHELL AND BROOKER LIVE IN PEWTER CITY. I was originally planning to have Mitchell come to a strange town and make his way to its Gym, there to meet Brooker, but this is evidently impossible because it is solid fact that they are both residents of Pewter City. GUYS, YOU ARE BEING TROUBLESOME.

Actually, my original plan wasn't terribly well thought-out, because why would Mitchell go to a Gym? He's not a Pokémon trainer. He's never owned a Pokémon, in fact, and he is frustrated by the fact that the world around him seems to be increasingly designed only for people with Pokémon. It is perfectly possible to exist without a Pokémon! Or it should be, at least. He barely trusts himself to look after himself; he can hardly accept the charge of another living creature.

ONE DAY THERE IS A ROCKSLIDE ON THE BORDERS OF PEWTER CITY, OH NO. Mitchell, out for a pleasant walk, finds himself about to be rockslided! But the leader of Pewter City Gym happens to be training on the cliff and sends his Onix to save the man in peril.

Possibly the Onix may have been responsible for the rockslide in the first place. The leader of Pewter City Gym isn't going to talk about that.

Although he is not actually injured, Mitchell, rather embarrassingly, faints in the Onix's coils. The Gym Leader (spoiler: it's Brooker), having established that the man is unhurt, rolls his eyes and orders his Onix to carry his insensible form back to the Gym. Tending to unconscious strangers is neither Brooker's area of expertise nor his idea of a good time, but he supposes he might have a tiny bit of responsibility for this man, given that he maybe possibly caused that rockslide.

He supposes.

(Should I write this fic, I may not be able to resist the urge to illustrate it with bad manips throughout.)


The Fic In Which Charlie Brooker and David Mitchell Totally Live Happily Ever After, Just Because.

...I'd like it, but I cannot begin to imagine how it would work. Oh, dear.

Comments

[nixwilliams.livejournal.com]

dead set is fantastic. apocalyptic in the best no-happy-ending way. it might make you depressed, i have no idea, but it's pretty well done, IMO.

[rionaleonhart]

Thank you for the information! I may have to check it out. (It actually seems to be available on the Channel 4 website, so I suppose I don't really have any excuse not to.)

(Er, that link is for my own reference (and that of any interested UK-based parties who may happen to wander by); I'm not just taunting you by waving UK-only video links in your face.)

[th-esaurus.livejournal.com]

I would read the shit out of that Pokemon crossover. Just saying.

(I managed to watch Dead Set and I am a HUUUUUUUGE wimp! I had to cover my eyes a couple of times. But it is a very, very good show, and my housemates (one of whom is a horror aficionado) all thought it was great too.)

[rionaleonhart]

The more I think about the idea, the more I love it. Perhaps they could run into trouble with Team Rocket!

(The fact that other wimps have managed to watch it is reassuring! Thank you.)

[misskass.livejournal.com]

should never be written ever and someone should probably write that are the most delightfully opposing tags in the world. =D

[rionaleonhart]

Ooh, you've just reminded me that I'd forgotten to add my 'two opposing tags: fight!' tag!

For a moment, I found the juxtaposition of a British panel game icon with not knowing who David Mitchell is completely bizarre, because David Mitchell is on panel games all the time. Then I remembered that he has never been on Never Mind the Buzzcocks and probably never will be, given that he owns only two CDs and doesn't like either of them.

[littlered2.livejournal.com]

DO NOT WATCH DEAD SET. I'm a massive zombie wimp, admittedly, but I made myself watch it and then spent weeks cowering in fear. My sister is still furious at me for how irritating I was because of it.

[rionaleonhart]

Ahahaha, oh, dear, now I am getting conflicting advice! I suppose I could give it a go and then back out if I start freaking out too much.

Neither of my housemates is here at the moment; it would probably be particularly unwise to watch it in an empty house, wouldn't it?

[amy-wolf.livejournal.com]

I vote zombies, angry unicorns (technically not on the list, but angry unicorns!) and happily-ever-after.

I suspect David Mitchell would be less of an angry unicorn and more of an incredibly insecure one. Which would also be fun, if you got tired of sparkly rainbow surliness.

I haven't seen Dead Set. I'm weird about zombie movies and things. I love watching them, and then go on to get nightmares. So now I only watch them if it's daytime and I've got someone nearby (still haven't seen 28 Days Later). And I still get nightmares, even if it's been months or years since I saw any.

Dream zombies just hate me. Or find me delicious.

[rionaleonhart]

I am not sure I shall ever get tired of surly unicorns. Brooker will complain rather a lot about having to carry Mitchell on his back, and Mitchell will be quite embarrassed about it, but they don't really have any options.

Shaun of the Dead is still the only zombie film I've ever actually seen. I was very confused by the reputation for being zombie-obsessed I somehow garnered in the Top Gear fandom, although admittedly the fact that I wrote two stories about Zombie Piers Morgan and a zombie apocalypse fic may have had something to do with it.

(Do I like this icon? I definitely like the picture it's from, but I cannot decide whether I like it as an icon or whether it just looks a bit odd.)

[darkest-alchemy.livejournal.com]

I'm thinking about zombie unicorns now.

Apparently, 28 Days Later isn't technically a zombie film. I think they're not actually dead or something. I don't know. My brother says it isn't anyway and he has this weird obsession with coming up with survival tactics for a zombie apocalypse.

[serriadh.livejournal.com]

Charlie's first thought (after some fairly impressive swearing) is that everyone was right after all: cannabis and video games really did make you go mad.

David's first thought was that this was just fucking typical. He stared at what had once been Charlie Brooker and went to rub his eyes, which was when he realised he had hooves. And of course he'd have hooves, because for some reason he was now a unicorn. Or was hallucinating he was a unicorn. 'Charlie,' he said tentatively (at least he seemed to be a talking unicorn: that was something), 'do you think you're a unicorn?'

Charlie turned and David noticed, rather sickened, that Charlie hair (mane, he corrected himself) looked rather good. David, even as a unicorn, had a rather odd fringe that kept falling in his eyes. Probably there was some horsey word for fringe that he should use.

'Oh great,' Charlie said. 'I don't know what's worse. That I'm caught in some fucking nightmare bad trip where I think we're both unicorns, or that I seem to have infected you with it as well'

[rionaleonhart]

I am making the most ridiculous noises of delight right now. Probably there was some horsey word for fringe that he should use - Mitchell! Always thinking about the important things!

'David's first thought was that this was just fucking typical' made me laugh really hard. 'Oh, we're both unicorns. Typical.' Also, '(at least he seemed to be a talking unicorn: that was something)' is brilliantly weird.

CHARLIE BROOKER. IMPRESSIVELY SWEARING UNICORN. GLORIOUS.

Also, I am weirdly touched by Charlie's 'oh, no, I've infected you as well?'

[amy-wolf.livejournal.com]

CHARLIE'S A PROFANE UNICORN! DAVID'S AN INSECURE UNICORN! TOGETHER THEY FIGHT CRIME!

(They do fight crime, right? You don't actually have to write those bits out if you don't want to; just say yes.)

[dracothelizard.livejournal.com]

Awww, poor David the insecure unicorn! :D

[dracothelizard.livejournal.com]

"Mr Mitchell is to begin hosting a panel show called The Bubble quite soon, I believe. The idea is that the panellists are locked away from the outside world for three days, then presented with news items and asked to determine whether they actually occurred during their incarceration or whether they were simply made up."

I like this idea even WITHOUT the addition of zombies!

...Also, Brooker the Gym Leader refusing to admit that his Onix was responsible for the Rockslide just made me think 'AHA so he's Jeremy Clarkson, then?' Because Clarkson would never admit to his Onix having caused a Rockslide either. Oh dear, Brooker and Clarkson would be Rocktype rivals, wouldn't they?

Dead Set is gorier than Supernatural, but it's not OVERLY gory, and it doesn't exactly have a happy ending and some of the characters are adorable.

[rionaleonhart]

It is a rather intriguing idea! Mitchell is generally not quite as much fun as a host as he is as a panellist, but at least this way he'll have a permanent presence; I don't suppose it's possible to have a permanent panellist on a game that requires temporary incarceration. And I really, really hope Brooker is on it at some point.

Brooker and Clarkson clearly have Pokémon battles all the time.

[zeitheist.livejournal.com]

I'm not sure about the zombie idea. I naturally assume that everybody in a zombie movie dies, so now I have the horrible mental image of Charlie and David... well, getting trapped in a dead-end corridor by zombies and realizing that all hope is lost. I'm a nasty bastard, sometimes.

You should write the Pokemon idea, just for laughs. I bet that, when David Mitchell wakes up, he inevitably blames Charlie Brooker for the landslide and starts ranting at him, which inevitably involves a tangent about how this world is incredibly unfriendly to people with no Pokemon, and Charlie is just standing there going thinking 'what kind of sad throwback doesn't have a Pokemon? I'll bet he doesn't own a computer or a television either, and gets frightened and frustrated by things like bacon sandwiches and zippers on clothes'.

[rionaleonhart]

That is the problem with the zombie idea: it would be unlikely to end well, and I cannot write real-person deathfic. I just can't.

I CANNOT EXPRESS HOW HAPPY YOUR SPECULATION ON THE POKÉMON IDEA MAKES ME. That is exactly what would happen!

Charlie is just standing there going thinking 'what kind of sad throwback doesn't have a Pokemon? I'll bet he doesn't own a computer or a television either, and gets frightened and frustrated by things like bacon sandwiches and zippers on clothes'.

You are brilliant.

[subtle-rift.livejournal.com]

(Should I write this fic, I may not be able to resist the urge to illustrate it with bad manips throughout.)

OMG PLEASE!!!

[rionaleonhart]

But it would be such a bad idea! Although admittedly not much worse than the concept of the fic itself.

[littlemoose.livejournal.com]

Dead Set is terrific stuff, as satirical and pointed (plenty of sniggers to be had, and there are a couple of laugh out loud bits) as you'd expect from Mr B. but it is pretty gory. (Mind you, I'm another wimp and I loved it)

[futuresoon.livejournal.com]

Dead Set was very well-written and had a few genuinely likable characters in it and was, from a plot standpoint, extremely interesting, but I had trouble sleeping afterward and couldn't stop noticing things like my dorm room having a big freaking glass window on the outside-facing wall which would be the least effective protection ever and, yeah, the story is not for people who do not like being depressed. The only zombie story I can 100% recommend to us wimps is Zombieland, which is not only very funny but surprisingly happy for a story where the vast majority of the earth is overrun by the undead. It is unrelated to Charlie Brooker, though, so maybe it is not as relevant to your interests.

[cryforthemoon.livejournal.com]

I am actually being more than semi-serious when I say I will attempt to write Brooker/Mitchell fic in return for any ukulele-related advice you could supply. This worries me...

[rionaleonhart]

Excellent. On what aspect of ukuleles do you require advice?