Trabia Garden

Back to The Hundred Line: Last Defense Academy! I played as far as the game would let me on the Mystery route, and now... well, I'm not sure what route I'm on now, but I can tell you that it contains the line 'I'll just have to make some counterfeit panties!'


( Notes on The Hundred Line. )


I'd seen it said that this game's script was long enough to fill sixty novels, which seemed implausible, so I investigated.

Riona: Yeah, I think that's an exaggeration, or at least they'd have to be short novels. Six million Japanese characters is apparently... maybe two point five or three million English words? It's probably more like thirty novels, if we're looking at average novel length. Five or six times the length of The Lord of the Rings.
Tem: Oh, God, we'll be here forever. We're stuck in a time loop.
Riona: I always knew this would happen.
Tem, simultaneously: We were always going to end up here.

I can't believe The Hundred Line: Last Defense Academy exists. The scale of it just does not feel like anything that would be created with commercial intent. It's a passion project; it's an Umineko, it's a Homestuck. Any sane studio would have stopped at the first route or two. But somehow here this game is, in all its sprawling, ridiculous glory.

As if the game weren't vast enough already, Kodaka has said he wants to add more routes, possibly consulting the fans on what they want to see.

I think we should all petition him to make my orgy fic canon. I think that would be right up his street.

More of The Hundred Line: Last Defense Academy! Just finished day forty-seven of a route that involves a surprising quantity of bees.

I think, when we're getting ready for battle, we should allow Yugamu to stab everyone with their Infusers. I think he would really enjoy that. A nice little treat for him.


( Notes on The Hundred Line. )


Out-of-context The Hundred Line: Last Defense Academy:

Yugamu: Don't worry about that. I'm really good at ramming stuff in holes that look like they'd be too small to fit.

This game is so weird and horny. I'm having a blast.

More of The Hundred Line: Last Defense Academy! I've finished the cult route and taken a brief detour back to the Coming-of-Age route.

Heads-up: this entry mentions (fictional) consent issues, to put it mildly.


( Notes on The Hundred Line. )


I can't believe how much of this game there is. There are a hundred endings, apparently. Having played for fifty hours, we've seen six of them.

More of The Hundred Line: Last Defense Academy! At this point it's getting hard to describe exactly where I am in this game. I'm in day fifty-five of a route that involves training at the beach.


( Notes on The Hundred Line. )


I love the kids' different priorities when they're told they'll get plenty of money after the war.

Tsubasa: Then can I build a brand-new workshop for my grandpa and me?
Sirei: Of course!
Darumi: Can I shut a bunch of kids in an abandoned building and force them to play a killing game?
Sirei: Sure, why the heck not?

I maxed out my bond with Yugamu. It's a shame Takumi doesn't speak in the bonding scenes; they'd be more fun with his reactions! Also, it's always such a disappointment when I max out a bond with someone in a Danganronpa-esque game and do not receive that character's underpants.

(After lamenting the lack of underpants, I commented, 'Although he wants to murder us, I suppose, which is equally intimate.'

'He could kill us and take our underpants,' Tem said, consolingly.)

sholio is hosting a commentfic promptfest! If you're in a fanfiction mood, you should run over to post some prompts or write some fills. It's only just started, but I'm watching it with interest.

In other news, I'm still playing The Hundred Line: Last Defense Academy! I'm up to day... eighty-six, I think? In the ranks of the stupid videogames I've played in the legacy of Danganronpa, it's not top-tier, but it's a solid contender; I'd put it around the level of Zanki Zero, below Master Detective Archives/AI: The Somnium Files and well above World's End Club.

I enjoy how much murderflirting Yugamu does. Constantly feeling his classmates out, trying to determine whether they'd be up for killing each other romantically. This guy really wants to find his kismesis.

Yugamu: You can't just throw your life away with the first murderer who takes an interest in you. Those one-night stabs may seem exciting, but there's so much more meaning in a committed relationship - one where you let your bloodlust grow over time. Trust me, your death has value. You need to treat it with respect.
Takemaru: Gotta hand it to ya: if ya take out all the serial killer crap, that almost sounds like good advice.

Yugamu and Darumi are definitely going to end up locked in a constant cycle of kinkily murdering each other and being revived.

Maybe that would cheer Darumi up, at least. Tem and I are very worried about Darumi. Her mental health is clearly an absolute wreck, but everyone just uncomfortably ignores all the alarming things she says because she's so creepy.

'Oh, man, they might have been despicable bastards, but they fought their way through so much hardship together!' Takemaru says, in tears, summing up my attitude to fictional characters.

I find myself wholly unsurprised that this game, which takes place over a hundred days, makes a point of celebrating day 69.

Riona: The Commander still has Ima.
Tem: It's an Imergency.

Congratulations to The Hundred Line for being the only game I've ever played that uses the word 'twincest' in dialogue.

I like how easy Yugamu is to get presents for. What's Murder Boy going to want? A scalpel, a ball gag and an iron maiden, obviously.

Tem and I have been replaying AI: nirvanA Initiative. This entry starts out just trying to discuss the game and rapidly descends into a hideous conversational nightmare. I'm very sorry.

I hate Lien and Kizuna's romance even more than I remember, and I remember really hating it. Lien sees Kizuna in a restaurant, decides he's in love with her without knowing anything about her, and asks her to marry him. She says no. He stalks her and hassles her, despite being repeatedly turned down, until she eventually gives in and agrees to date him. The game somehow expects us to root for their relationship and think they're cute??

Outrageous that Ryuki gets tied up by the killer, and yet we don't get to see him tied up. This is such a horny game! How could it miss this opportunity?

Tama: It's my dream to do it on a sofa.
Riona: That seems like a very achievable dream.
Tem: Well, not if you're an eyeball.

And now the hideous conversational nightmare begins. (For anyone who has not played this game and wants context: Tama is Ryuki's artificially intelligent and extremely horny synthetic eyeball. You may feel you need more context than this. You're not getting it.)


( The Great Eyeball Sex Debate of 2025. )


I suppose Tama's also capable of having sofa sex in someone else's dream. But, slightly tragically, not with Ryuki, or at least not with the actual living Ryuki (as opposed to someone else's dream of Ryuki); Ryuki doesn't have a physical presence when they enter people's dreams together.

Maybe Tama can be present in Ryuki's dreams when he's sleeping, though? I don't think it ever comes up.

Anyway! Regardless of the mechanics, Ryuki is definitely in a relationship with his own eyeball, and it's... weirdly cute sometimes?

Karaoke! At an actual karaoke place, this time, meaning we were largely limited to actual hits rather than the obscure nonsense we tend to sing at home.

I arrived a few minutes after the starting time, so the others had already gone in. I didn't know the surname of the person who'd booked the room, so I told the receptionist, 'I'm looking for a group of millennials with interesting hair.'

'You're in room seven,' he said, sagely.

For my first song, Rei and I performed 'Scream' from High School Musical 3, with all the intensity we could manage. It was swiftly followed by another guest's pick of 'The Emptiness Machine' by Linkin Park, which really brought home how thematically similar 'Scream' is to a Linkin Park song.

Tem wasn't able to come along, alas, but asked us to perform 'Livin' on a Prayer' in xyr honour; Rei and I dutifully belted it out. It was fun! Very difficult song to sing without dramatic arm motions. We did not manage to resist the dramatic arm motions.

I also fell prey to the temptation to gesture dramatically when joining in on another guest's pick of 'Total Eclipse of the Heart' later on. At one point, during this song, I turned and saw that all the people in the room had turned on their phone torches and were waving them in time to the music.

(NB: when I say 'all the people in the room', I mean about five people, but please feel free to envision me bringing the house down in front of a massive crowd if you'd like.)

My other performances:

- 'Teenage Dirtbag' was another person's pick, but it was one I'd been thinking about singing myself, so I took the second microphone. The whole room sang along with gusto.

- When I'd warmed up enough to get overambitious, I attempted 'All the Things She Said' by TATU and 'Savior' by Rise Against. Both very fun; both very challenging!

- I did 'Dreams' by the Corrs. One member of the party, not having realised it was a cover rather than the Fleetwood Mac original, expressed confusion at this 'dance remix'.

- As a favour to my twelve-year-old self, I performed 'Hunter' by Dido, a song I loved when I was a kid. In my head, I'd tied it to my childhood dragon obsession; a friend of mine told me that the music video featured a dragon, and I didn't realise until I was an adult and actually watched the video that this was an outrageous lie. I was sure other people would know this one, but apparently not, so I ended up doing an unanticipated solo!

- I correctly judged that most of the room would know 'Immortals' by Fall Out Boy. Everyone sang along with this one; it was fun!

- A guest who'd gone to the loo came back into the room during my performance of 'How You Remind Me' by Nickelback and said, 'Oh, this song,' damningly. Another person also expressed unhappiness when I chose this song for home karaoke earlier in the year. Karaoke is not a place for taste. Every time this song gets a disparaging comment, I'm just going to perform it again, louder.

And a few notes from performances by other people:

- We all ended up on our feet, doing ridiculous synchronised backing dancing, during a solo perfomance of 'Lay All Your Love on Me' by ABBA. Great fun.

- I forced Rei to sing 'I Write Sins Not Tragedies' by Panic! at the Disco because they'd recently read a songfic based on it and were cursed to be unable to take it seriously. 'I'm going to murder you,' Rei informed me, as I handed them the microphone.

- The people singing 'Hurt' by Johnny Cash also struggled to take it seriously, and it was very funny to see them losing it laughing while attempting the very sombre lyrics.

- The songs everyone could join in on were a real blast. 'Rasputin' immediately followed by 'Stacy's Mom': an incredible combination. I also enjoyed everyone singing passionately on the chorus of 'Iris' by the Goo Goo Girls.

- 'Maybe I should add this to my Bill/Dipper playlist,' Rei commented to me during 'Murder on the Dancefloor' by Sophie Ellis-Bextor. Shortly afterwards, they spotted me making notes for this entry and expressed concern that I was going to expose their Billdip playlist plans. I was actually just noting that most of the room ended up on their feet and dancing during the song, but, because I was so amused by Rei's reaction, I'm now also telling you that it's going onto their Bill/Dipper playlist.

By popular demand, here's another entry on Metaphor: ReFantazio! (When I say 'popular demand', I mean that necrophilia told me to post this. It takes very little pressure to get me to talk about videogames.)

We're just about to leave Virga Island. No real plot spoilers below the cut, but you might want to avoid this entry if you don't want to know which characters have joined your party by this point.


( Notes on Metaphor: ReFantazio. )


I'm still absolutely loving this game. I hadn't even heard of it before the demo came out; it's been such a great surprise!

Tem and I have finished our replay of Master Detective Archives: Rain Code! Here are some more of our stupid conversations while playing, this time with full-game spoilers.


( Spoilers for Master Detective Archives: Rain Code. )


Having taken some time to consider the question of whether I ship Yuma and Shinigami, I have concluded that I prefer them as friends, but they're friends who have sex, obviously.

The ending hints very heavily at a sequel, and I really hope they make one; I'd love to play another of these games.

Tem and I have been replaying Master Detective Archives: Rain Code. This game is extremely silly and horny, it's filled with characters named things like 'Zilch Alexander' and 'Yomi Hellsmile', and we act like idiots when we play it, which I feel is very much the way it was meant to be played.

Yuma: I'm Yuma Kokohead!
(The name 'Yuma Kokohead' zooms past Yuma in large letters, in slow motion.)
Tem: That's what happened to me when I changed my name.
Riona: To Yuma Kokohead.
Tem: Yes. Legally, in this country, if you change your name, it has to be to Yuma Kokohead.

One of the characters is named Pucci, pronounced 'Poochie'.

Pucci: Names are meaningless.
Riona: If I were called Poochie, I would probably also convince myself that names were meaningless.
Tem: I'd probably just change my name.
Riona and Tem: To Yuma Kokohead.

Zange: I'm Zange Eraser.
Riona: Oh, no, he's going to erase all our Zanges!

Yuma is so endearing. I love that his defining quality as a character is being a sub. He has a big crush on everyone he works with, and it's great.

We-as-Yuma gained some Detective Points, or DP.

Riona: I don't remember why we want DP.
(pause)
Tem: I mean...

Culprit: Your investigation isn't worth shit!
Tem: Well, that's not very nice.
Riona: Yuma's a good boy!
Tem: Yuma's a good boy! Don't be mean to him! Look at his little face; he's so keen.

At the end of every Mystery Labyrinth, Shinigami grows to enormous size and engulfs Yuma's head in her mouth, because this game likes to cram as many fetishes as it can get away with into every moment.

Tem: I don't know how to say this in a way you're not going to make fun of me for. (pause) But, if I could grow to fifty feet tall, I would also put people in my mouth. I wouldn't eat them, but I think it would be funny to threaten to eat them. This is not a sex thing, I want to clarify.
(I listen in silence, nod, and pick up my phone so I can write down what Tem just said for this journal entry.)
Tem: Yes, I thought you would do that. I'm vulnerable in front of you, and what do I get in return? Mockery.

(EDIT: Tem just stormed into my room and declared, 'I showed that exchange to Rei, and Rei agrees with me. Rei says this is your tall person privilege again.'

For context, Rei and Tem are each barely over five feet tall. It's possible that, at the towering height of 5'8", I cannot fully appreciate the appeal of growing to fifty feet.)