rionaleonhart | Entries tagged with one tree hill

It is Derren Brown's birthday today! Should I do something to celebrate? I have already sent him a ukulele, edited a Jigglypuff into his picture and thrown him into the TARDIS, so I don't really know what else I can possibly do. Once you are the Doctor's companion with a Jigglypuff and a ukulele, what more can you want?

Actually, yesterday, I watched the Derren Brown interview on Inside Your Mind (which was, by the way, amazing. Nine-year-old Derren setting fire to his friend's dad's boat! Derren generally being dorky and hopeless and adorable!) and, in response to Derren's wonderful story of his rubbishness at basketball ('IT WAS LIKE BEING BACK AT SCHOOL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF THE TEACHER YELLING AT YOU IT WAS ALI G'), sent the following e-mail to

moogle62:

Of course, this means that there needs to be terrible AU crossover fic in which teenage Derren Brown goes to Tree Hill high school and is the worst basketball player in the world and has sex with Lucas.

So I suppose there is something I could write to celebrate Derren Brown's birthday.

But I won't. Because it would be appalling.

What I will do, instead, is say that one of the things I really love about Derren - aside from, you know, the dorkishness and the adorability and the bizarrely attractive eeeeeeeeevil - is the way his work says 'look at this, this is what the human mind is capable of' (his explanation of how he remembers which cards have come up when playing Blackjack with four decks is a good example of this, and something on which he expands in his book). Human beings are so much more able and fascinating than I had ever realised before.

So happy birthday, Derren Brown. Keep making the world a more interesting place.

Progress on the Derren-and-the-Doctor fic: it is now fifteen thousand words long! Making it longer than any work of fiction I have ever completed. It's not a solo effort, admittedly, but that is still quite a number of words, and I am rather amused by the fact that what looks very like it will become the longest piece of writing on which I have ever worked is also quite possibly the most ridiculous.

(Writing fanfiction involving the Winchesters from Derren's point of view, incidentally, is really difficult. I DO NOT KNOW HOW TO MAKE SAM AND DEAN INTERACT WITH PEOPLE WHO ARE NOT DEAN OR SAM.)

Oh, dear. I keep wanting to update, partly because I am bored and partly because finding myself confronted by the twin stares of Derren Brown and his Jigglypuff every time I visit my journal is starting to seriously unnerve me, but my fandom of the moment is this ridiculous imaginary universe in which Derren Brown is the Doctor's companion, and I don't want to ramble about that too much for fear of giving away everything that happens in the fic.

Perhaps I could write a few snippets in which Derren and the Doctor pop into fandoms that aren't going to show up in the actual story? Yes, I believe I shall.

"I've worked it out!" the Doctor announces. "The cliff face on the left is allergic to feet!"

There is a pause.

"The cliff is allergic to feet," Derren says.

"I thought maybe it was sunglasses, but it's definitely feet. See, all the Zoombinis with feet are on the other side."

"The cliff," Derren says. "Is allergic. To feet."

"Humans," the Doctor says, rolling his eyes. "Show them a species that's born wearing rollerskates and they'll still have trouble with a little allergic cliff."

-
"I'm sure there are more interesting places to visit than contemporary New Mexico."

"Contemporary for you, maybe," the Doctor points out. "I haven't been in 2008 for aaaaaages."

"I see," Derren says. "And is there any particular reason we've come to a school?"

The Doctor grins. Somewhere inside the building, a bell rings.

Derren's mind goes suddenly blank, and the next thing of which he is aware is dancing in a huge group of brightly-clad teenagers, singing enthusiastically about the end of the school day. He is more than a little perturbed by this. The mildly worrying issue of involuntary singing and the embarrassment of being twice the age of his fellow dancers aside, Derren is not particularly enthusiastic about the end of the school day. The end of the school day means there are many more Channel Four watchers on the street to stop him, making any sort of journey five times longer. The song is a highly inaccurate representation of his feelings.

When whatever has induced this (hopefully) temporary insanity forces him to drop to one knee and serenade the Doctor, however, he decides that accuracy is overrated.

-
Derren has a vague feeling that bursting into giggles may not be the wisest thing to do, given the circumstances. The circumstances, of course, being 'Derren is at present concealed in the undergrowth, downwind from a vampire with incredible speed, strength and senses, who has recently ripped the head off a still-living deer and is probably entirely capable of doing the same thing to Derren'.

But there are only so many reponses possible when a deadly, terrifying predator stands in the sunlight and sparkles.

Speaking of giant mechanical spiders, I have been rewatching the first season of One Tree Hill with my housemates, and I find myself massively 'shipping Haley/Peyton this time around. They would be adorable! Please tell me that there is Haley/Peyton in the future, One Tree Hill watchers.

Tomorrow, I am returning to university. My new Brighton abode does not have Internet access, and so I am probably not going to be around much for a period of time as yet undetermined.

'But, Riona,' I hear you cry, 'surely you wouldn't leave us without giving us more of your thoughts on incestuous implications and other matters in a terrible American high school drama series watched by perhaps four people on your friendslist, would you?'

I'm glad you asked.

Regarding the One Tree Hill episode 'How Can You Be Sure?':

- LUCAS SCOTT. SERIOUSLY. HOW IS IT POSSIBLE FOR ANYONE TO BE THAT ADORABLE? When I see him, of course, there's always a small part of my mind laughing uncontrollably at the fact that he is being played by a man who has his own initials tattooed on his arm (oh, Chad), but the vast majority is just 'awww'ing. Especially when he is with his mother. Cutest parent-child relationship I have ever seen in fiction? It is quite possible.

- Also ridiculously adorable: Nathan/Haley. You guys! I am so charmed! Nathan is kind of an idiot, and kind of a git, but when he is with Haley he just becomes incredibly lovely. Haley doesn't need a Nathan to make her lovely, but she is especially charming when she is with him.

- You know, One Tree Hill, when you open a scene between Keith and Lucas with Keith carrying a pair of jeans across the room and continue to film him from the waist up for the entire conversation, I am going to assume that he is calmly speaking to his nephew sans trousers.

I'm just saying that maybe that's something you need to think about.

Not - not trouserless Keith speaking to Lucas. You need to think about your filming choices. (Unless 'Keith is not wearing trousers; Lucas is unfazed' was what you were actually going for, in which case you did a very good job and also, er, why?)

Seriously, is this show actually full of incestuous implications or has fandom just warped my perception?

More One Tree Hill, and I knew Nicki's actress looked familiar! She played Madison in Supernatural! I - I - I have no idea what to do with that, actually. THERE'S A CROSSOVER SOMEWHERE. NICKI HAD TO LEAVE JAKE BECAUSE OF HER UNFORTUNATE AFFLICTION.

Peyton! 'That's a creepy threesome.' I love you, Peyton, ridiculous angst and all. Please continue to imply creepy and yet so hot Nathan/Haley/Lucas threesomes (ashsjhsgjhgh I want it to happen it could totally happen).

Also creepy: Whitey totally matchmaking Nathan and Lucas. 'LUCAS, HELP NATHAN WITH HIS BASKETBALL TECHNIQUE.' 'HEY, LUCAS AND NATHAN, I'VE GOT YOU A HOTEL ROOM TOGETHER AND YOU CANNOT SWAP ROOMMATES. ENJOY IT. I SHALL NOW WALK OFF WITH A MILDLY EVIL SMIRK.' I bet he's a Wincest writer. And then the shots inside the room were carefully filmed at such an angle that Nathan and Lucas appeared to be in the same bed. Seriously, One Tree Hill, are you doing this on purpose?

In 'Spirit in the Night', which is one of those frequent One Tree Hill titles that appear to have nothing whatsoever to do with the episode (seriously, the episode is about a cheerleading competition), Lucas says, 'Haley could be with anybody and I'd be happy for her. I mean, even... Tim.'

I misheard this as 'I mean, even Dan.'

I think that Haley/Dan is probably one of the most disturbing pairings ever to impinge upon my brain. Nathan/Dan would probably alarm me less, and Nathan is Dan's son.

(...all right, it would only alarm me a little less.)

Now, of course, I'm imagining Lucas' reaction to discovering that Haley and Dan are in a (horrifying, horrifying) relationship, and I cannot stop giggling. Oh, Lucas, and you thought it was bad when she was dating Nathan.

- Thank you so much for your contributions to the happiness post! I'll try to go through and comment on them in the next couple of days. I think - I think - that I may have a home for the next term. Fingers crossed!

- Watching the early season four House episodes is a very different experience when you know which fellows are the important ones. TAUB WAS ALMOST ARBITRARILY FIRED IN HIS FIRST EPISODE. I ALMOST SHOUTED 'NOOOOOOOO' DESPITE KNOWING HOW THINGS WERE TO TURN OUT. Kutner also almost went! And I'd forgotten how much I loved Awesome Old Dude. He should hang out with Bobby and Iroh. And also Auron, who somehow falls into the 'awesome old dude' category despite being in his thirties. Oh, Final Fantasy, you and your absurdly low average character age.

- I have now watched 'I Shall Believe' and 'Suddenly Everything Has Changed' (oh, One Tree Hill, you and your ridiculous episode titles), on the One Tree Hill DVDs that mysteriously turned up at my door (who could possibly have ordered them? It must have been some sort of mistake), and, okay, Brooke is amazing. I had not quite realised how amazing Brooke was. She is massively amazing.

I'm still 'shipping Lucas/Peyton, though. Ha,

wanttobeatree. (Although I'm also 'shipping Lucas/Brooke and Lucas/Haley and Lucas/Nathan ~~and I'm teetering dangerously close to 'shipping Lucas/Keith and Lucas/Karen as well~~, so that's not really saying much. Lucas is apparently one of those characters I 'ship with everyone. Or possibly One Tree Hill is just one of those shows in which everyone/everyone else is clearly the truth.)

I am actually slightly more embarrassed about watching One Tree Hill than I was about High School Musical. Despite the fact that they are the same thing. LUCAS AND NATHAN MISS BASKETBALL HOOPS TO REPRESENT THEIR ANGST. THEY ARE TROY BOLTON. BOTH OF THEM.

In related news, I cannot watch a basketball sequence in anything without playing 'Get'cha Head in the Game' or 'Now or Never' in my head. You can imagine Dan shouting 'Come on, boy; come on, boy, come on!' in time to the music, can't you? Well, er, I can.

- I have actually written a few snippets of a Prison Break real-person fic in which Michael Scofield is a real person and has no idea that what he believes is his real life is being filmed for television. And the sinister Director kidnaps the other actors' loved ones in order to force them to keep up the deception, and Dominic is slowly becoming more and more genuinely attached to his fake brother, and this is a terrible idea.

When I was in Manchester with

sazzlette and

wanttobeatree, they forced me at what I'm going to say was gunpoint to watch One Tree Hill. This is an American drama about high school students and how basketball TEARS FAMILIES APART and IS THE MOST IMPORTANT THING EVER and also about the evils of drugs and alcohol and partying and tattoos and infidelity and, gasp, safe sex. There is an average of one car crash every four episodes. It is ridiculous. It is also terribly, terribly addictive.

So far, I have seen thirteen episodes, up to 'Hanging by a Moment'. Here are some thoughts:

- Lucas is adorable. Adorable! (I still find Chad Michael Murray hilarious for no good reason.)

- I would be up for some Nathan/Lucas. It doesn't really feel like incest - they weren't raised together, after all - and so there's room for all the fun 'augh this is so wrong' feelings on the parts of the characters without violating my usual 'I CANNOT DESTROY THIS SIBLING RELATIONSHIP WITH INCEST' block. This is not helped by the fact that Lucas, in an episode in which he was kissing someone he really should not have been kissing, said, 'You know, that this is wrong... somehow it makes it feel deeper.' LUCAS IS DRAWN TOWARDS WRONGNESS, GUYS. LUCAS/NATHAN. YOU KNOW IT MAKES SENSE.

-

wanttobeatree,

sazzlette and I had a brief discussion about Lucas the sparkly vampire, who angsts about no longer being able to play basketball because oh no he is too strong. I would not be surprised were this an actual episode. (This is a lie.)

- I would rather like to see a Supernatural episode in which they investigate a haunted high school and meet the One Tree Hill cast, playing thinly-disguised versions of their One Tree Hill characters. They could be called things like 'Leyton' and 'Snucas'.

- I am pretty massively 'shipping Lucas/Peyton.

wanttobeatree is horrified.

( And cut for spoilers up to the thirteenth episode, 'Hanging by a Moment.' )

Today, two other girls and I had to present to my Approaches to Grammar workshop group. It was not until twenty minutes after it ended that I realised I had concluded the session with '"...and witnessed is a lexical non-finite passive participle!" *JAZZHANDS*'

DEAR SELF: SOMETHING IS WRONG WITH YOU.

Then I went into a Zavvi, saw One Tree Hill DVDs and immediately cracked up laughing. I've never even watched One Tree Hill! There is just something intrinsically hilarious about Chad Michael Murray!

Here is something I just stumbled across in a Notepad document from about half a year ago:

You know what I'd like to see? A Groundhog Day-type fic written from the point of view of someone who isn't the person caught in the time loop. Endless permutations of the same day, the viewpoint character unaware while their companion becomes more and more distressed. I'm just interested in seeing whether it would work, really.

THIS IDEA IS AWESOME. WHY DID I NOT POST ABOUT IT BEFORE? I'm tempted to use it for my Art of Short Fiction assignment, actually.

I cannot stop watching videos of Jensen and Jared on YouTube. These guys are amazing. Here is a clip that particularly amused me: 'Let me rephrase that: what's your odd question?' (At the beginning, Jared is (adorably!) put out because all the questions the fans are asking are for Jensen.)

According to my tag counts, this entry officially makes Supernatural the most talked-about fandom in this journal. I should probably make some sort of ridiculous manip post to celebrate this.

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Entries tagged with one tree hill

It's The Only Reason To Have A Cake.

Had The English Won At Senlac, We Would Have Less Diverse Daleks.

Apparently There's Some Sort Of Life Thing Outside The Internet.

That's A Creepy Threesome.

They Pick The Best, And Then Kidnap Their Families.

Why Do All Our Conversations Come Back To Paedophilia?

I May Have Briefly Considered Purchase Before Coming To My Senses.

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